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In this episode, I discuss the psychology and biology of desire, love and attachment. I explain how childhood attachment types are thought to inform adult attachment styles to romantic partners, and I describe some of the major theories of human mate selection, relationships and infidelity. Additionally, I explore the neurobiology and proposed subconscious processing underlying desire, love and attachment, including the roles of empathy and “positive delusion.” I outline how self-awareness can shift one’s relationship attachment style towards securely bonded partnerships. Finally, I describe specific tools and supplements that have been researched to increase libido and sex drive. Throughout the episode, I explain the science and key mechanisms underlying romantic love and outline tools for those seeking to find a strong, healthy relationship, or for those wanting to strengthen an existing relationship. Thank you to our sponsors Thesis: https://takethesis.com/huberman AG1 (Athletic Greens): https://athleticgreens.com/huberman InsideTracker: https://info.insidetracker.com/huberman Our Patreon page https://www.patreon.com/andrewhuberman Supplements from Thorne https://www.thorne.com/u/huberman Social & Website Instagram - https://www.facebook.com/unsupportedbrowser Twitter - https://twitter.com/hubermanlab Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/unsupportedbrowser Website - https://www.hubermanlab.com/ Newsletter - https://www.hubermanlab.com/newsletter Article Links Romantic love: an fMRI study of a neural mechanism for mate choice: https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1002/cne.20772 Relationship-specific Encoding of Social Touch in Somatosensory and Insular Cortice: https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0306452220305741 Investigating real-life emotions in romantic couples: a mobile EEG study: https://www.nature.com/articles/s41598-020-80590-w?error=cookies_not_supported&code=bcbf0749-78b6-437d-97b4-c5a950f5e6f8 Brain Knows Who Is on the Same Wavelength: Resting-State Connectivity Can Predict Compatibility of a Female–Male Relationship: https://academic.oup.com/cercor/article/31/11/5077/6304412 Manipulation of Self-Expansion Alters Responses to Attractive Alternative Partners: https://www.frontiersin.org/journals/psychology/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2020.00938/full Randomized Clinical Trial on the Use of PHYSTA Freeze-Dried Water Extract of Eurycoma longifolia for the Improvement of Quality of Life and Sexual Well-Being in Men: https://www.hindawi.com/journals/ecam/2012/429268/ For additional links and resources on Maca, Tongkat Ali and Tribulus, also see links in “Human Effect Matrix” at examine.com. Book Links Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find and Keep Love: https://www.amazon.com/Attached-Science-Adult-Attachment-YouFind/dp/1585429139?hvadid=241584142530&hvdev=c&hvlocphy=9028797&hvnetw=g&hvqmt=e&hvrand=162209221728194164&hvtargid=kwd-878912541&hydadcr=15492_10339794 Right Brain Psychotherapy: https://www.amazon.com/Right-Brain-Psychotherapy-Allan-Schore/dp/0393712850/?hvadid=346678714779&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=16597875227370056394&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=c&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9028797&hvtargid=pla-573668170707&adgrpid=72499260920&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvadid=346678714779&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=16597875227370056394&hvqmt=&hvdev=c&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9028797&hvtargid=pla-573668170707 The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide from the Country’s Foremost Relationship Expert: https://www.amazon.com/Seven-Principles-Making-Marriage-Work/dp/0553447718/?hvadid=312674999652&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=17290471525837439185&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=c&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9028797&hvtargid=pla-434109122391 Other Links The Gottman Institute Love Lab: A Research-Based Approach to Relationships: https://www.gottman.com/love-lab/ New York Times - The 36 Questions that Lead to Love (1/9/2015): https://www.nytimes.com/2015/01/09/style/no-37-big-wedding-or-small.html Timestamps 00:00:00 Desire, Love & Attachment 00:02:59 Odor, Perceived Attractiveness & Birth Control 00:08:04 Thesis, AG1 (Athletic Greens), InsideTracker 00:14:13 Romance: Balancing Love & Desire 00:19:00 Animal Studies, Vasopressin & Monogamy 00:22:06 Strange Situation Task, Childhood Attachment Styles 00:32:52 Adult Attachment Styles 00:38:50 Secure Attachment 00:41:23 Autonomic Arousal: The “See-Saw” 00:50:39 Tool: Self-Awareness, Healthy Interdependence 00:53:11 Neurobiology of Desire, Love & Attachment 00:58:02 Empathy & Mating & the Autonomic Nervous System 01:10:02 Positive Delusion, Touch 01:15:20 Relationship Stability 01:21:22 Selecting Mates, Recognition of Autonomic Tone 01:38:28 Neural Mechanisms of Romantic Attachment 01:47:43 Autonomic Coordination in Relationships 01:56:13 Infidelity & Cheating 02:08:56 “Chemistry”, Subconscious Processes 02:12:44 Tools: Libido & Sex Drive 02:20:20 Maca (Maca root) 02:25:58 Tongkat Ali (Longjack) 02:28:56 Tribulus terrestris 02:33:14 Zero-Cost Support, YouTube, Spotify/Apple Reviews, Sponsors, Patreon, Instagram, Twitter, Thorne Please note that The Huberman Lab Podcast is distinct from Dr. Huberman's teaching and research roles at Stanford University School of Medicine. The information provided in this show is not medical advice, nor should it be taken or applied as a replacement for medical advice. The Huberman Lab Podcast, its employees, guests and affiliates assume no liability for the application of the information discussed. Title Card Photo Credit: Mike Blabac - https://www.blabacphoto.com/