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СМЕХBOOK | Час расплаты | Уральские пельмени

СМЕХBOOK | Час расплаты | Уральские пельмени

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Азбука Уральских пельменей - Н | Уральские пельмени 2019

Азбука Уральских пельменей - Н | Уральские пельмени 2019

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СМЕХBOOK | Шершеляфамов | Уральские пельмени

СМЕХBOOK | Шершеляфамов | Уральские пельмени

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Азбука Уральских пельменей - Е | Уральские пельмени 2019

Азбука Уральских пельменей - Е | Уральские пельмени 2019

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Королевство кривых кулис | 2 часть | Уральские пельмени

Королевство кривых кулис | 2 часть | Уральские пельмени

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СМЕХBOOK | Спортивный интерес | Уральские пельмени

СМЕХBOOK | Спортивный интерес | Уральские пельмени

СМЕХBOOK | Многоролевые игры | Уральские пельмени

СМЕХBOOK | Многоролевые игры | Уральские пельмени

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СМЕХBOOK | По семейным обстоятельствам | Уральские пельмени

СМЕХBOOK | По семейным обстоятельствам | Уральские пельмени

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СМЕХBOOK | Трудности перевода | Уральские пельмени

СМЕХBOOK | Трудности перевода | Уральские пельмени

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Азбука Уральских пельменей - М | Уральские пельмени 2019

Азбука Уральских пельменей - М | Уральские пельмени 2019

Channel: СТС

уральские пельмени

смехбук

смехbook

стс

ctc

стс медиа

ctc media

ctctv

стс сериалы

стс онлайн

уральские пельмени 2019

уральские пельмени последний выпуск

уральские пельмени премьера на стс

юмористическое шоу уральские пельмени

уральские пельмени лучшее

уральские пельмени новое 2018

уральские пельмени 2018

уральские пельмени новое

азбука уральских пельменей

дмитрий брекоткин

ксения корнева

дмитрий соколов

вячеслав мясников

сергей рожков

Случай не из жизни

уральскиепельмени

00:00:37

so that you don’t have to buy last year’s

00:00:40

food, buy it before the new year

00:00:45

[music]

00:00:50

[music]

00:00:52

andrey on the way you walk thirds searched

00:00:56

there already there you are such a pale

00:00:59

man there I don’t really want to

00:01:02

meet him you’re afraid of him MKK until bright

00:01:05

he was just afraid he’s the kind of person he’s like,

00:01:10

you know, he and I weren’t kind of

00:01:13

friends, well, she was

00:01:18

firmly three rubles great,

00:01:22

haven’t seen each other for a long time, and this is

00:01:25

probably your wife, Marina,

00:01:26

hello, Vyacheslav Myasnikov,

00:01:28

your husband’s classmate, look, didn’t

00:01:34

sell his wife, I understand, Andrey, we need to

00:01:36

talk, we need to, mom cooked and What

00:01:41

do you think Rozhkov friend Masha started

00:01:43

talking about so I won’t find you and

00:01:46

Rozhkov prozhek less often roofs stealing latte the

00:01:50

surname is so not funny or is it the

00:01:52

case that I have butchers meat miss nobody’s

00:01:55

lafarge is rotten this surname

00:01:58

understood the goodness of the lawless butchers they are still

00:02:02

insulting him yes I don’t

00:02:03

really care what you’re doing,

00:02:05

I’ll pass it on to you, you’ll pay for it after the scythe,

00:02:08

I’ll pick it up,

00:02:10

you go there, I understand, I was on my way, he’s

00:02:13

insulting you in the background of the fortune teller, be careful,

00:02:17

be careful than the horns,

00:02:19

otherwise everyone will know what you

00:02:23

pulled out during labor lessons,

00:02:26

you pulled it out, it was a rolling pin,

00:02:29

I’d look for glasses, there are dumplings places of

00:02:34

languages tomorrow it was one movement all

00:02:38

the photo on Instagram flies away my whole

00:02:40

class stuck themselves in understood the horns

00:02:43

can you do that they called me thicker

00:02:45

they found out that you're a loshara Danil already he and a

00:02:48

loshara I haven't left you think you're doing

00:02:51

repairs to the school toilet the inscription on fire will disappear from there

00:02:54

love yes girl 20 years old

00:02:56

update listen you want to feel from home

00:02:59

I don’t need your money or money my mother

00:03:01

will give me my whole life and sweet dear

00:03:04

committed to sweeten with cream or three

00:03:07

products together to rebel me

00:03:09

please not inaccessibility video about

00:03:13

Sterligov horoscope here is a change house boo boo

00:03:17

giant ford kuga

00:03:25

[ applause]

00:03:33

this is also run treasured you

00:03:37

want a toad to pop up what a jojoba

00:03:40

what a toad wait a minute I’ll start a photo I’ll make

00:03:43

facebook

00:03:45

eat you horns so the pigeons don’t like

00:03:49

what the pigeons did ra lived with the goat the

00:03:53

cat for which you cheated

00:03:55

without a straw how did you manage there. that

00:03:59

little one Rozhkova for the first time

00:04:14

and now I don’t care at all, get up,

00:04:20

we’ve been friends since school, getting up, taking pictures, hugging, hugging

00:04:24

like step-brothers,

00:04:28

call Marinka, it stank, bm the photo will boil and call

00:04:31

our chabo, let him catch up,

00:04:33

I’ll gather you all, the second Saturday of February, the

00:04:37

evening of the alumni meeting,

00:04:39

you’ll be friends with me like I used to

00:04:40

love school I can’t speak on behalf of the

00:04:44

horns water park

00:04:47

we are no longer

00:04:56

[music]

00:05:03

not so party the

00:05:07

lid is open the notes are ready well no

00:05:16

no but no legs the more royal the

00:05:31

stronger the technical equipment

00:05:46

[music]

00:05:59

[music] it’s

00:06:08

more expensive for everyone to buy a horse and the more opera

00:06:11

house

00:06:14

good evening then the corners of the boots

00:06:17

dear friends today two professionals

00:06:22

I and the secret managed to pour your ears

00:06:31

a little classics

00:06:34

therian I'm afraid I ask for sound extracting

00:06:37

structures and so go crushed the lid

00:06:49

sharp to the notes ready nude no

00:06:56

how no not to knit not how

00:07:01

so no but not how will burst

00:07:08

like so not like not years ago

00:07:11

speaking there was an English club but I'm with Iris

00:07:24

but you're armed with Mozart's language

00:07:29

not is in da house and Holmes has notes a

00:07:38

[applause]

00:07:43

so far

00:07:44

it's an awkward pause

00:07:50

I'll tell you a story one day I was sitting in

00:07:56

creativity on there were fans we it happens that she

00:08:00

drove us, a man came up to us and asked for a

00:08:07

lighter,

00:08:08

I didn’t have a lighter, but the one sitting there

00:08:12

only turned out to be the absolute truth, you brought the sheet music,

00:08:17

no, I just heard a story in

00:08:21

which I participated and decided to come too,

00:08:26

he often parted, took part and

00:08:30

run for the sheet music, I was

00:08:41

still a bullet back then one story already without Sergei

00:08:45

Anatolyevich

00:08:46

once went to a disco, yes I look like

00:08:50

at a disco,

00:08:52

so to speak, without ballast there is a man with a rebus

00:08:56

and asked for a lighter

00:09:00

[applause]

00:09:03

I said no, Sergei has it, only you

00:09:08

brought it from, of course, and well, you’re married,

00:09:13

please come to the table okay to the table let's celebrate this with

00:09:19

what we'll celebrate with Tchaikovsky

00:09:23

so you're starting to pour we have

00:09:33

a problem I forgot but you here they are no I

00:09:40

actually forgot the

00:09:43

musical notation inside then I'll go, by God according to the

00:09:52

musical notation

00:09:53

and you yourself will entertain the viewer

00:09:58

[applause]

00:10:19

bought soda fonda

00:10:27

like to be a problem was to find me I would have

00:10:30

found that the problem is from forgot but

00:10:34

you darling don’t forget the problem

00:10:38

was solved by the account has grown up here you have three

00:10:43

rubles go away

00:10:45

the problem here is 2 rubles this is not a problem you

00:10:51

want as you understand now the same

00:10:58

terrible world power will not be able to stop us

00:11:03

[music] the

00:11:08

partisans look great for the date of the concert

00:11:12

put your house I’m telling you that they brought

00:11:18

500

00:11:25

Ira is fixed and if about the change

00:11:28

from 5000 rubles then go and exchange

00:11:35

the fascists and so the fascists are defeated

00:11:40

everything is ready almost size 3 the lid is open

00:11:44

Dmitrievich I want to sleep

00:11:48

Sergey for the night let’s go we will solve

00:11:51

problems as they arise music

00:11:56

on earth all people have

00:12:01

difficulties but don’t need them my

00:12:17

yours don’t leave you just need to take the

00:12:24

problems solve

00:12:35

[applause]

00:12:41

[music]

00:12:50

girl

00:12:51

we sat down you’re great the prosecutor’s office date me

00:12:58

for 5 cups two deputies will sit down

00:13:01

[ music]

00:13:10

sees that a law has been passed prohibiting

00:13:13

Russian officials from receiving treatment

00:13:15

abroad, our officials went to ordinary

00:13:19

district clinics

00:13:22

[music]

00:13:24

[applause]

00:13:28

but now the family will be treated here

00:13:38

[applause]

00:13:42

also, my God Sergei, look at the

00:13:49

walls Yulia, don’t start this is vintage

00:13:59

look at the tiles on the walls with

00:14:02

Venetian cracks Seryozha I

00:14:05

saw this 1 exhibition attention this is the latest

00:14:07

collection and what is it that gilding where in a

00:14:11

knot around they are tokens of gas pipes in the

00:14:16

passage I’m treating people could now these are goals

00:14:21

gay as she said bi

00:14:25

yul but I should start it myself this is already a Slavic gesture, what is

00:14:32

this rudeness, this Russia

00:14:36

15th century, a brilliant actress, I believe this

00:14:43

is a historical reconstruction of the

00:14:46

reconstruction

00:14:47

girl, good afternoon, how do we get fluorography,

00:14:51

but quickly get a fluorography for the girl,

00:14:54

thank you, we need to go through fluorography

00:14:58

first, go to the local police officer, go to the therapist,

00:15:01

will you give us in the direction of Parvati, surgeon,

00:15:04

dentist, ENT, like no one else, and about

00:15:07

hockey,

00:15:08

then you get tested and only then you

00:15:11

go for fluorography, here’s a couple of auto kapets,

00:15:17

it’s the same thing that you have in

00:15:23

general, I’m awesome,

00:15:27

awesome class

00:15:29

of you, and how long will it take in general,

00:15:31

two days and the lives of you and the club

00:15:35

these catacombs speak out more widely for

00:15:38

your groups this is the coolest

00:15:40

conversation I have any idea please

00:15:44

go through the queue don’t hold up the

00:15:47

queue queue here is a word that I didn’t

00:15:50

guess in the crossword puzzle sequence of

00:15:53

people depending on each other and the place

00:15:56

where aggression arises

00:15:58

queue of gold you don’t come near me

00:16:04

I I’ll probably send

00:16:10

room 15 to the psychiatrist first, it’s cuneiform, that’s how they wrote it

00:16:16

even before our friend, the cabin is without a glitch, the weight is

00:16:19

live, the code here needs to be solved, so everything needs to be

00:16:21

solved, like everyone else, and

00:16:24

we’ll take you to the

00:16:25

Baja camp and the map itself, you’re

00:16:29

talking to a child like he’s talking to a child, he smoothly I’m not

00:16:31

a child already nudity where to get a wardrobe

00:16:36

so it’s not closed in the wardrobe and

00:16:41

work I told you so I

00:16:56

wish you good health I wish you to take it for

00:17:00

treatment health you will need it you

00:17:03

definitely need it as you are here my dear I

00:17:06

’m in philological and architectural ecstasy

00:17:10

and I’m in a gastronomic place you’ve been to a

00:17:13

buffet place and also no, you won’t believe

00:17:15

molecular cuisine

00:17:19

compote of dried fruits with buckwheat flavor

00:17:24

in Paris to prepare something like this

00:17:27

they use liquid nitrogen and a vacuum

00:17:29

splitter and here is one ladle,

00:17:32

first in bitterness then in compote, you are all

00:17:44

also extremely happy about some finally q & as the

00:17:48

food on the first floor of Oringa 1 5 tons of

00:17:51

oil works and goes down, everything is played

00:17:58

in a Chinese philosophical treatise, the function

00:18:02

overcome and you will get stronger, everything is done with such

00:18:06

meaning, they also say that our medicine is bad, it’s

00:18:08

nonsense from the State Department, I doubted it before, but

00:18:12

now I’m convinced, Petya,

00:18:14

then tell me what medical

00:18:16

dentistry is, 35 offices without na I came

00:18:19

after 5 tanks they sent me to a mechanic seat,

00:18:20

I didn’t find it at all, so I’m

00:18:24

reading carefully the second building, oh,

00:18:28

but in the second, how to get through the underground passage,

00:18:31

not only there a pipe burst, it was drowned, it’s

00:18:34

steep, you can’t go anywhere, you

00:18:42

were told it was flooded waist-deep in water, not

00:18:44

a sniff, he said no at home tuba

00:18:49

go by the way, I’m afraid of the dentist like hell

00:18:54

and then I ran, maybe this is a decision

00:18:58

arrow to cut funding the less

00:19:02

money clinics have, those people here are

00:19:04

more interested in the mental staff, don’t fuss,

00:19:09

I’m asking for energy, this is sable, it’s

00:19:14

hypoallergenic, what kind of allergies do I have,

00:19:17

social allergies

00:19:19

or not? I bet, well, really, your fur coat is more expensive than the

00:19:21

entire clinic, comrades lays udino, they have a

00:19:24

fast girl, we sat down

00:19:28

and you were great at the prosecutor’s office, you sat me down

00:19:39

over five centuries of two deputies, figured

00:19:44

it out, well, once again, I’m preparing without difficulty

00:19:48

there, such a system can

00:19:50

depend on how many letters are shorter,

00:19:53

specialists to and office David 23 to

00:19:56

remove 5 letters once whom we remove ada

00:19:58

how many let’s say 1 to select the item

00:20:00

disassembles and he is the boss here once he

00:20:02

removes this one and then he brings it like this and

00:20:05

removes it and that’s it and therefore once and that’s it and that’s how

00:20:07

it happened

00:20:10

get treated in Israel this is also with taxi drivers,

00:20:17

son, give these letters

00:20:20

back, we passed the quest, but we have a maximum of

00:20:23

Nikolai than we need to also pass through the single-mandate

00:20:29

[music]

00:20:38

[music]

00:20:42

sanitary zone sanitary zone sanitary zone

00:20:50

you are always suddenly

00:20:53

and always Howard

00:20:56

[music]

00:21:07

clarity

00:21:11

all accessibility in a good sense such

00:21:16

homogeneity and the simplicity was

00:21:18

not like it and the little one covers it, my

00:21:20

daughter likes it and they provided it forever

00:21:23

and already liked the grandmothers 90-year-old

00:21:27

legends [ __ ] like it and any

00:21:29

age because

00:21:31

because I haven’t seen their account of this and it’s

00:21:34

just humor

00:21:36

it’s made for the theatrical character of the actors

00:21:38

humor you will kick out the receiver and

00:21:41

how the performance makes a lot of sense from me and

00:21:44

humor

00:21:45

don’t call me very good like that or

00:21:48

the ticket is not him, that is, everyone understands him

00:21:50

like Pushkin to have this [ __ ], everyone understands him

00:21:55

and they have become a profit, so they are such

00:21:59

rifle guys, they are very talented and very

00:22:01

they understood but didn’t understand this feature

00:22:03

that people need they understand it they are

00:22:07

from the people to many all the guys they are from the

00:22:09

people themselves and that’s why their people love and

00:22:13

understand their music page we have

00:22:20

thank you thank you and a short preface of

00:22:26

questions tell me who he went to the south

00:22:29

by train one person a new ok

00:22:32

great song dedicated to all those who

00:22:35

traveled south by train I'm going I'm on the

00:22:39

train me and my family and we're going we're going on the

00:22:45

train to Sochi from Anadyr

00:22:49

five months have passed on the road in

00:22:52

Krasnodar we went out to the platform of a drain we

00:22:56

bought

00:22:57

three buckets did the same thing, did you have experience in the carriage,

00:23:01

but in the carriage the toilet and locked fruit

00:23:05

will not be washed thoroughly,

00:23:09

the conductor came up to ask and the conductor

00:23:12

strictly says zone sanitary

00:23:18

zone sanitary

00:23:21

you are always suddenly

00:23:24

and always insidious

00:23:27

and they didn’t see my fruit, they only saw a

00:23:32

plastic banana

00:23:34

at the children’s school drawing and then

00:23:38

we decided that we don’t care, draining

00:23:40

wiped the duvet cover,

00:23:43

thank God they’re crap, they have plums, we all

00:23:48

decided with the pit

00:23:50

everything will be digested inside the belt our

00:23:54

period quietly moved, the plums also

00:23:58

moved inside, we all lined up near the vestibule

00:24:02

and the conductor sternly says

00:24:06

sanitary zone

00:24:08

[music]

00:24:10

sanitary zone

00:24:13

you are always suddenly

00:24:16

and always someone

00:24:19

because of these fruits the Krasnodar

00:24:23

sea I didn’t see at all only the

00:24:27

plum dropped I have to go to the station already

00:24:32

5 months ahead on the road in Krasnodar

00:24:37

the train will be there I’ll take it that it’s not

00:24:41

necessary to wash it’s a roach ryazhenka belyash the zone is

00:24:47

busy

00:24:51

sanitary

00:24:53

with always suddenly the

00:24:57

intensity

00:24:59

[music]

00:25:04

no wonder

00:25:07

find

00:25:09

parody

00:25:11

indar

00:25:13

thank you

00:25:15

[applause] [music]

00:25:31

fairy tales the wizard of the emerald city

00:25:34

whirli had a flying house which she

00:25:37

drove just like a woman

00:25:40

drives a car

00:25:42

[applause]

00:25:50

[applause]

00:25:58

situations however yes you crushed my car with your house

00:26:06

through to 4 with your man already in the hallway the

00:26:09

sight of a new patch of parquet I have pieced

00:26:13

you what are you shinobi on it with your dirty ones there

00:26:15

is already change where did this come from and from the

00:26:19

emerald city

00:26:20

this is that the residential complex I take Lena

00:26:25

is located in a country where the mountains rest their

00:26:29

shoulders in the skies where all the roads are

00:26:31

paved yellow brick where the

00:26:34

forces of the poppy fields grow as a by-product of Afghanistan,

00:26:38

don’t betray, no need to ask

00:26:40

questions to you anymore, plus ru the Venetian one

00:26:42

was broken in the living room, why would he like to

00:26:45

look, killed in vain, broken, want to

00:26:47

look in the Louvre, look there, otherwise the

00:26:49

same GA-100 and .

00:26:50

don’t scare me, I’ll call you right away

00:26:56

cat aleph you’re doing and I’m doing you right away

00:27:08

what are you doing tormenting a person but in the garage

00:27:11

lunch means eating for an afternoon snack

00:27:13

come drive you here a portion

00:27:16

[music]

00:27:19

about and we wish but he’s Putin what would happen

00:27:21

if you cracked like me I was driving along the Moscow Ring Road on the

00:27:26

side of the Garden Ring, so to speak and

00:27:31

no, I was driving along the intersection of the Garden

00:27:33

Ring of the Moscow Ring Road oh no no no yes yes yes yes oh no no

00:27:38

no I’ll lose it I was driving this is already

00:27:41

normal I was driving turned on to give

00:27:46

way such a triangle is round and

00:27:51

let’s essentially what happened stole

00:27:58

my bag, in general, it’s flying around there, why do

00:28:05

I need bags, you’re my [ __ ], it’s mine, it’s mine,

00:28:11

please look, Lord, my things are

00:28:13

here, and I also planted my passport, not an

00:28:17

intriguer, let’s go to the department at all, and that I

00:28:23

’ll go anywhere without company, you, that he’s already a

00:28:25

tin woodman and a scare Tatoshka

00:28:30

Tatoshka in the palm of a small talking

00:28:33

dog, very stylish, by the way, in our

00:28:35

hands talk to you flying house

00:28:41

a lot drug control

00:28:45

drive away yes he is at the intersection as

00:28:47

usual she is a gardener why I say by hand

00:28:49

and now bring it you will understand

00:28:53

don’t scare me now my

00:28:56

boyfriend will come he will explain everything to you Why do they

00:28:59

scare me with their boyfriend? The presenter let him

00:29:03

live with the scarecrow for a year and then as a tin

00:29:08

woodcutter for another year, then the lion was afraid of me

00:29:12

after the brave one was handed over to him, then

00:29:20

I see how you managed to drive in a wheelbarrow then then

00:29:24

you actually have

00:29:27

no brains at all, he’s a young man why a

00:29:31

high-quality girl, she may not be

00:29:32

specially in life, she’s not specially

00:29:34

already 100 shifts, mother clouds, you

00:29:37

serve, you understand tattoos, what’s this,

00:29:42

OP OP OP, you didn’t see an idol from and you

00:29:50

understand tattoos, this is the kind of

00:29:53

man

00:29:54

and what is it that I wanted to ask you

00:29:58

in the morning I wake up to such nonsense

00:30:00

hostel post allergies I don’t know

00:30:05

[music]

00:30:11

sorry

00:30:17

[music]

00:30:22

expensive vodka doesn’t speak its own language are you

00:30:27

still drinking there or something by the way at

00:30:30

home we have the right to

00:30:32

pull out the clinch of your ears you dumped a car on me

00:30:35

Khan you Sasha calm down. there is

00:30:48

no blood here, simple magic, and

00:30:51

ever at one moment they all lost

00:31:03

football and 1 pumpkin returned home

00:31:09

from really who are you scaring me the gnomes

00:31:13

kept

00:31:21

you ever woke up from a rake

00:31:23

[applause]

00:31:24

and maybe a bearded man is standing above you and

00:31:27

kiss you trying to put his

00:31:30

lips on you theory Yes, may you live happily ever after in

00:31:35

your fairy tales, may

00:31:38

your cosmetics run out one day, and

00:31:41

you that he was considered a girl, I have

00:31:44

never talked to him like that in my life,

00:31:46

thank you, who went through the fairy tale and is

00:31:52

not afraid of life

00:31:55

[applause]

00:32:05

[music]

00:32:06

[ applause]

00:32:08

[music]

00:32:11

[applause]

00:32:13

[music]

00:32:18

coach you know I left boxing you don't

00:32:21

wince boxing you can't leave

00:32:23

boxing while I have a mortgage amazing but

00:32:37

in Greco-Roman wrestling the

00:32:38

Dagestanis defeat both the Greeks and the Romans

00:33:10

[music]

00:33:15

professional boxing

00:33:17

this is a show for the poor where 2 millionaires punch

00:33:20

each other in the face

00:33:23

[applause]

00:33:30

coach I thought we came to watch boxing

00:33:34

we came to watch boxing and you will

00:33:37

fight

00:33:38

liquidator coach you know I left

00:33:41

boxing

00:33:42

you can’t leave boxing you can’t

00:33:44

leave boxing yet I have a mortgage you

00:33:46

understand predator come on okay coach but

00:33:51

promise promise that this is my last

00:33:53

fight

00:33:54

[music]

00:33:55

[applause]

00:33:58

[music]

00:34:03

[applause] [music]

00:34:04

[applause]

00:34:11

I promise you that this is your last fight it hurts you

00:34:16

hurt and it hurts you

00:34:20

smeared with symbolic ketchup majors

00:34:24

balm Vietnamese star

00:34:27

about yourself will help eat coach I don’t

00:34:32

see anything pain negotiated as usual and who

00:34:35

should lie down and or he but she has an

00:34:38

assumption that you are in the second round and

00:34:43

agreed write a bubble coach let’s

00:34:45

agree let’s agree in short

00:34:48

listen I agreed he lies in the second

00:34:58

paradise perfectly still a couple of how he will lie down and he wo

00:35:01

n’t fit in the ring

00:35:04

but will mix with the ring let’s

00:35:06

find in the second Oleg everywhere in the second

00:35:08

round everyone will suspect a catch

00:35:10

that the fight is fixed let me lie down in

00:35:12

the eleventh and you will live I’ll lie down in the

00:35:15

eleventh coach okay let's

00:35:18

try it should be great what for the money

00:35:20

for the money I really want about 10 pieces

00:35:23

what is now a piece for me 9 oppenheim everything

00:35:30

is cool what kind of train some kind of conspiracy for

00:35:33

what belt for

00:35:34

this one for the army what the heck

00:35:39

coach where is my mouth guard my mouth guard where I

00:35:41

forgot my shoulder The liquidator in the last fight

00:35:44

beat himself and he’s in the mouth I’m ready the coach is

00:35:50

ready I’m ready let’s do it

00:35:54

[music]

00:35:57

just do the result I asked to

00:36:00

eat in the second round 6 km and they decided that

00:36:03

there and you do

00:36:08

big things and

00:36:11

do through it what you do

00:36:19

[ applause]

00:36:21

what are you doing they look like even though you asked to

00:36:24

eat 2 how

00:36:25

many fingers do you see 14 coach let

00:36:30

me out I'm freezing wait wait and toast and

00:36:34

nothing always 5

00:36:36

coach I understood the tactics I know that

00:36:39

I made him from NATO and he was lucky

00:36:44

chewing how much is left 22 rounds

00:36:49

but I need 300 we agreed on 300

00:36:54

from the inside I’m saying now I’ll agree I’d listen to

00:36:57

him just kill him, we’re sick of everything, we were

00:37:00

losing everything, I agreed everything was

00:37:02

fine, great, you’re a super trainer of the chip

00:37:05

with a blow to the chip, also formalizing how much

00:37:07

you inflicted 256 great, he’s there for several 1

00:37:19

you lead one and a half

00:37:22

than my dad,

00:37:26

he just hit it, didn’t notice, he

00:37:31

just hit you and that’s all

00:37:34

enough, but I’m great, this is a good mix, a good

00:37:38

coach, wait for that, in my opinion, it

00:37:40

turned out that way, will

00:37:47

the cordon work, wait, wait, they’re building turpentine

00:37:52

ammonia, drink ammonia,

00:37:56

all now without cops give it easier yaga

00:37:59

notice

00:38:05

and

00:38:06

[music] go

00:38:19

to bed already

00:38:22

few with a friend leave because of you we

00:38:24

can’t start boxing the way it’s quite a matter

00:38:29

stop us now the police will call

00:38:31

the police I’m still leaving everything we need to do if you want it

00:38:36

according to the army version of me

00:38:40

[applause]

00:38:41

[music ] [applause]

00:38:45

[music]

00:38:47

[applause] [music]

00:38:49

and

00:38:50

[music]

00:38:51

[applause]

00:38:52

[music]

00:39:05

I want from

00:39:10

but hearts meet

00:39:14

[music]

00:39:23

police officers who have not passed the certification

00:39:26

are sent to the security guard and let's senior

00:39:30

lieutenant and horns report how

00:39:33

we are doing crime ok some kind of

00:39:35

crime alone there is no one from

00:39:37

crime it’s great just today a

00:39:40

commission is coming if we ourselves are all

00:39:42

good they will raise our rank and give me a bonus

00:39:45

so

00:39:46

Rozhkov so that here I have no flights Pavel I

00:39:49

can hold out for Mother’s Day

00:39:51

[music]

00:39:55

hello

00:40:04

so butchers again you, yes, why did you come

00:40:08

again, and the newspaper was stolen,

00:40:11

we won’t open a case, no, I even

00:40:13

wrote a sincere confession, here

00:40:15

you go, I just robbed grandmothers all last year, the

00:40:18

rain of players meant that I had to

00:40:22

take the sign of a wealthy grandmother,

00:40:25

go home, no, I won’t go to the butchers and

00:40:28

I'm a thief, yesterday I stole a penny from a neighbor and

00:40:30

drowned it in a quarry, what kind of shape are you in,

00:40:33

what kind of shape are

00:40:34

you, a recycler, the

00:40:38

neighbor will give you a state bonus, thank you, I'll say go

00:40:40

home, no, I'm a scammer in the subway, I don't

00:40:43

pay through the turnstile, you'll come so you're an

00:40:46

athlete, you're a bubka audio cd quite without

00:40:51

jumping over the turnstile I will pass

00:40:54

under the turnstile prologue below

00:40:56

so a [ __ ] means disabled become your

00:41:00

free metro ride go home but I wo

00:41:04

n’t go anywhere until you put me in jail

00:41:08

you got me archers I didn’t

00:41:11

pass the certification anymore come there statistics

00:41:13

port to 5

00:41:16

I have six I don’t pay children and alimony, I’m

00:41:18

a criminal, although I’m a criminal with six children,

00:41:21

you’re the mother-heroine of the body here, let’s pay,

00:41:24

let’s go home, no, no, yesterday I tore off

00:41:27

women’s hats,

00:41:28

so spring is already warm, you still have skirts

00:41:33

to support, let’s take them off, I’ll take them,

00:41:35

no, wait, I want to write down a

00:41:39

statement, I was robbed because the iron was wounded

00:41:41

watch, you

00:41:43

bastard, you're a mystic,

00:41:47

this is not my watch, my engraving was

00:41:51

like this here for 17th place at the bottom of eating

00:41:54

hot dogs,

00:41:59

thank you, and also with your wife and sleeping,

00:42:04

and now it's in the text or

00:42:07

whatever, but think about the excavation

00:42:20

[applause]

00:42:22

live, let's live

00:42:28

like this now that's who she's sleeping with,

00:42:32

I thought who she's sleeping with now I'm calm,

00:42:35

she's really [ __ ] up,

00:42:42

go home, no, I also stole a pistol, where are

00:42:49

we? I'm a pistol in the morning, you're a [ __ ], you

00:42:54

know how many shackles he's wearing, now

00:42:57

this pistol will be locked up for life, there's

00:42:59

no place for it I’m a criminal, you know what they

00:43:02

do in prison with people like you, to a couple of

00:43:05

guns and steal the cops, I know they’ll crown you

00:43:08

all, you know, with a woman, a gun, they’ll be put in prison, I’ll

00:43:11

give it to you only

00:43:13

on and you gave it to me, and I know you on the

00:43:17

finger of a skewer, it’s not my gun and

00:43:19

I was spinning you, how did you end up in the police? I

00:43:22

studied poorly, I would have studied well,

00:43:26

I ate goosal without work, so I’ll come,

00:43:30

although now about doing it, I’ll

00:43:33

take you home now with flashing lights, no, no need to shake your

00:43:38

hand, I’ll shake the Minolta,

00:43:41

let everyone know what kind of pickup truck you are, how

00:43:42

cruel you are they began to do the bottom, don’t

00:43:45

leave it like that, went through kaggle, condemned it, and

00:43:48

what’s the order, I’ll examine the criminals, let’s go

00:43:50

to Christ and what prize is this, this is for this,

00:43:53

our former employee of the butchers, yes, he is this

00:43:56

mother-heroine, he is an athlete, a disabled [ __ ],

00:43:59

we need such and such,

00:44:01

he found a gun with which five I

00:44:03

've been looking for years not for drains, but come on, sit down, sit down,

00:44:07

sit down and write a statement and you, Lieutenant

00:44:11

Rozhkov,

00:44:12

vacate your office to Captain Melnikov,

00:44:15

to hell, and until we kick

00:44:17

out werewolves like you, the

00:44:20

police certification ends with the investigators of the key of

00:44:23

the trade union committee's flashing lights, we'll take you home not for

00:44:28

[music ]

00:44:39

somewhere at the top of the snowflake in your workshop

00:44:45

lived three friends, a blizzard, a

00:44:49

blizzard and a blizzard,

00:44:51

and next to the fence,

00:44:55

tavale covers on the lake, three gray-haired hard

00:45:00

workers

00:45:02

maronese deck and oak and oak pouring drops into

00:45:07

glasses of

00:45:11

guests invites the blizzard has prepared a

00:45:15

blizzard, a snowdrift and a burga of icicles, syrup

00:45:20

came to them having arranged a draft, the frost

00:45:25

beater and Tupac of the snow will go to dad's

00:45:30

lycopene, they turned on the delay and Canetti began

00:45:34

in the New Year, and I want

00:45:39

[music]

00:45:45

and hearts

00:45:47

and

00:45:49

acetone

00:45:53

already [music]

00:46:02

after that New Year's night, my

00:46:06

sons appeared and the snowstorm dots. Mitya

00:46:11

is spinning the baskets

00:46:15

and the son is by the road and blue

00:46:18

on the windows, drawing pictures in the south, NATO

00:46:23

counted it out and

00:46:25

invites passers-by to take a ride

00:46:29

before, they were angry because they were

00:46:33

single, but now they are happy in their families

00:46:37

and global warming is waiting for us all,

00:46:43

warming New Year,

00:46:51

street,

00:46:54

you are a player,

00:46:56

welcome

00:46:58

[ music]

00:47:03

he was

00:47:05

already

00:47:06

[music]

Description:

СМЕХBOOK | Случай не из жизни | Уральские пельмени Официальный сайт: ► Сайт - https://ctc.ru/ ► Телепрограмма - https://ctc.ru/programm/ ► Сериалы - https://ctc.ru/projects/serials/ ► Новости - https://ctc.ru/zakadrom/novosti/ Приложение СТС для iOS и Android: ► Скачать приложение - https://ctc.ru/apps/ Социальные сети: ► Группа VK - http://vk.com/ctc ► Мы в Twitter - http://twitter.com/ctc ► Мы в Одноклассниках - https://ok.ru/ctc

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