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Video tags
Subtitles
Russian
00:00:24
doctor help00:00:26
this is outrageous laurels of boxes there is no need to be00:00:30
so indignant your00:00:33
today's enema is not another00:00:36
joke of the nurses to the wise it was a planned00:00:39
procedure yes I'm not talking about that I'm talking about00:00:41
the new doctor he's crazy why did00:00:45
you decide that he likes the00:00:48
way they feed you in our canteen you know I wouldn’t be00:00:50
surprised, you love, that’s not what this idiot is talking about00:00:53
every night, you imagine that he’s00:00:55
a lamp, you, well, let him00:00:58
imagine, what does it mean, let me not00:01:02
sleep in the light,00:01:13
drinks, mince pies, come up and00:01:17
drink, and we also have00:01:21
tea as a soft drink the coffee was also00:01:24
said that it’s not hot if you’ll modi I’ll00:01:27
wait until it cools down no thanks and00:01:29
the pies you have for the chef with meat or with jam00:01:32
flyer breeze oh and d how is it like this it’s00:01:35
all mixed up pay 15 rubles00:01:37
rain and a pie from the bag can go with00:01:40
cabbage maybe be with eggs,00:01:42
lucky with meat, go 10 rubles for00:01:47
fried and if the pies are the Czechs00:01:51
they used to meow leaf Kolya00:01:54
asked stupid questions, okay, just00:01:57
kidding,00:01:58
how many chebureks are not enough when take00:02:03
shawarma, here's shawarma, this carcass is necessary slurry,00:02:07
silent,00:02:08
give me 5 shawarma 5 shawarma00:02:12
show me USA skills shawarma00:02:18
in short on the demeter of shawarma 2 ball we00:02:22
look together I got it00:02:31
in general so the girl is our wife00:02:34
silver wedding00:02:35
congratulations soon haha thank you we would like to00:02:38
give ourselves what an unpleasant gift00:02:41
great we have wonderful00:02:44
family tours to Romania00:02:45
you go to you don’t use me the day I00:02:49
have00:02:50
excellent but maybe then00:02:53
Paris is the capital of love and romance go00:02:58
wives in Paris like in Tula with your00:03:00
samovar Christ well what to be more00:03:05
delightful of00:03:06
course we have wonderful cruises along the00:03:10
Mediterranean North and even00:03:13
sea of Japan luxurious cabins and very00:03:15
affordable prices great in the00:03:19
attic please two seats on the cruise00:03:21
for me and my wife good but there will be00:03:24
some special requests but a00:03:26
large bed can be from 200:03:28
separate beds there can be two00:03:30
separate cabins no of course from the city yes00:03:34
Yes,00:03:35
separate ships and you have different barriers00:03:40
.00:03:47
listen Andryukha, well, I don’t know, but as for me,00:03:50
you are wrong and they will return the money and they won’t care about you00:03:52
either, that having money00:03:55
makes the principle already00:03:56
these grief white dance of Vienna with carriages, well,00:03:59
how is it white no color sour cream what00:04:02
color of light cream and few kooks or00:04:05
also00:04:06
abela it’s just a mixture of all the colors of the00:04:08
spectrum I understand and the white dance itself is the color00:04:11
you now say that black doesn’t00:04:14
appeal to black either it’s the absence of color well how00:04:17
is it black it’s not a color you need that00:04:19
you say it won’t be such a racist I00:04:22
tolerated it’s not a color and black is not the color is00:04:25
wrong, how come it’s black, it’s not a color,00:04:29
last week they covered up a scratch like this on00:04:32
my black sedan with black paint00:04:34
and I gave my hard-earned00:04:36
6,000 rubles for it, well, of course you deceived me00:04:39
and they just covered it over with colorless paint,00:04:41
I don’t know, so what? ask whoever you want,00:04:46
shhhh, don’t believe me, let’s ask whoever you00:04:49
want, please, for the sake of it was based on00:04:52
this man, I’ll ask this, sorry,00:04:56
please, it’s okay,00:04:59
anyone can walk in this park,00:05:03
please tell me, what do you think,00:05:05
white is the color of the Torah, and00:05:10
King Mordechai came out in royal robes00:05:13
Yakhontovoe is white,00:05:15
which means white is the color, but this is what you00:05:19
think, and black is the color of the00:05:22
Torah, and he separated all the sheep, which are00:05:24
black, which means black is also a00:05:28
color, thank you, well, what am I telling you, and00:05:31
white is a color, and black is also a color, which00:05:35
means I sold it to you color TV00:05:40
dig00:05:49
an anecdote anecdote while fishing a man caught00:05:51
for a fool she says I will fulfill three of your00:05:53
wishes00:05:54
[ __ ] no need three I fulfill one but three00:05:57
times00:06:07
gentlemen fishermen you00:06:08
will scare away all the fish if only you00:06:16
said a word the naked man must say in five words00:06:22
stop this if you want this nonsense but we00:06:26
need to decide very much an important question and who00:06:29
decides important issues in a beer hall, I’ll start by00:06:32
gathering you, we’ve gathered you protection on the nose,00:06:41
winter fishing,00:06:43
the question is pointed out, we need to determine how many00:06:47
bottles of vodka to take per person, besides00:06:53
the year before, we took one bottle,00:06:56
we lost fishing rods, or we00:07:01
lost 2, we lost a bus, I think it’s necessary00:07:09
to we don’t take fishing rods for anyone to take three bottles per person00:07:12
and we don’t get off the bus00:07:18
and what shift is growing but the fight is the fight the00:07:26
kids00:07:28
you were asked to write an essay on the topic of00:07:30
my favorite show the results are00:07:33
quite contradictory I’ll tell you,00:07:35
you upset me with your illiterate00:07:37
flight of fancy and some students00:07:41
stood out especially, for example, Nikishin and00:07:44
intestines about what program you wrote about00:07:48
what to me when you probably want to00:07:51
get into this program someday I00:07:52
really want to remember they don’t write the words00:07:56
the presenter is written through e here you are not a primus00:08:00
team of experts and you won’t be able to00:08:01
raise big bucks answering to the00:08:04
confused questions of TV viewers of the world,00:08:10
Mikhail00:08:12
Atsky, annealing in Mexico, this is my favorite00:08:16
program because it is about true00:08:18
love, which is so missing in life, from00:08:24
you, you miss love in the fifth grade, what00:08:27
will you miss in the eighth grade,00:08:30
of course I was most pleased with Petrov,00:08:33
stand up, Petrov, say no Petrov did00:08:37
you write the essay yourself or did someone00:08:41
help you parroted Petrov please00:08:47
3ds and you dad that you can00:08:51
watch programs and not just receive00:09:06
good indignation here please00:09:09
can he move me to another cube00:09:16
and what doesn’t suit you about this and you don’t00:09:18
listened that it suits me he snores00:09:20
like he didn’t know that like a sawmill00:09:31
any right in any00:09:34
empty gypsies zombies really drink just00:09:36
transplant it00:09:37
should upset you well unfortunately everyone has00:09:39
a cube and noticed put me then you have00:09:42
a cube and I’ll pay I’ll buy all your tea00:09:45
around everything yours is better, I’ll buy anything,00:09:47
just change the massage, of course, how will00:09:49
I explain this to the head of the train, what will00:09:52
I tell him, I let him in because he did00:09:53
n’t pay, because he’s an honest00:09:56
bribe taker, well, just try not to00:10:02
pay attention, then you can have one more00:10:05
request00:10:06
in front of the station, veil, warn00:10:08
me please are you there you want no I00:10:11
want to see how he sleeps through his00:10:13
station00:10:24
this is the worst day of my life something00:10:28
daughter I hope you’ve already00:10:30
had your life when I’m leaving on a business trip and00:10:34
daddy forgot to pick you up from kindergarten the00:10:37
wedding is just for the sake of watching everyone finished00:10:41
drinking sadness the music is like that of the presenter00:10:44
and I almost didn’t notice until you said00:10:47
no but look at our presenter is already00:10:49
holding just balance he is holding on to the00:10:53
men the petticoats are not the hairstyle has slipped the00:11:06
bouquet I have lost there will be something to remember00:11:10
later you yourself will remember and the media I00:11:12
remember mom I want to forget like a00:11:15
bad dream, well, this will do for you, I00:11:18
want this for the first last time when I00:11:21
marry journalists and why is everyone00:11:24
such a wonderful wife00:11:25
and you know this wonderful husband00:11:27
published love letters to him00:11:29
that my dear should flatter you00:11:34
words he published them on humor page00:11:48
Japanese policeman is who granted IT here00:11:57
bulls in a tomato rarely did you00:12:01
learn something very rich convenient protection00:12:05
what kind of bays or00:12:06
so a new tank are you taking for a walk or maybe00:12:10
Vanechka missed you for the vine00:12:12
missed the Japanese ones which by the way00:12:16
I dreamed about yesterday that is so00:12:20
hot, half-naked, well, stripped to the waist, he did00:12:23
n’t change the olive oil,00:12:26
because he was a00:12:27
Japanese policeman,00:12:30
you can sit behind the wheel and just sit there,00:12:34
just don’t get used to it, I have a00:12:36
jealous guy in such a salon and I don’t mind dying,00:12:43
hey, you’re not there, but at first I thought it was00:12:49
someone again through our service the traffic jam is00:12:51
bypassed, well, yes, this happens here too, but00:12:56
seriously, that there was something00:13:00
wrong with your car, yes, it’s not00:13:02
mine yet, I just took it for a test drive to00:13:05
try it and wanted to look at00:13:07
everything he’s okay there, you can let him in00:13:10
first, tell me where you00:13:13
get that kind of money00:13:16
Vanechka, you don’t have such a place,00:13:31
Lieutenant Petrov,00:13:33
your documents are like asking why00:13:39
a black eye, well, photographs, and this is the00:13:42
little sister who drew this with foil for00:13:45
several years, my little sister is 20, well, she’s00:13:50
just I know that I’m going to break in the car and00:13:53
move the arrows, that next time I00:13:55
painted the passport, but because the right00:13:58
document is a serious one, I already painted it last time00:14:01
to the youth, you’re doing this,00:14:06
you’re an adult, why are you00:14:07
driving like that and that the person was hit by the g is00:14:11
lying near the shopping center and this is this is the day00:14:14
he beat me since he himself fell on a banana,00:14:20
slipped and fell, no, he00:14:23
wanted to cross the road and I stood there to let him00:14:25
pass, so he was so 90 that he lost consciousness,00:14:40
i.e. anty texts and swear00:14:45
she will then come to me to cry from where00:14:52
okay00:14:54
daughter come here everything is clear the school called00:15:03
I have nothing to do with the money on the table anyone00:15:07
can steal since it is closed and under the00:15:10
tray there are always large bills chuse00:15:16
they say maybe ours in the00:15:19
guy’s room asked to hide them a little the police00:15:27
came listen00:15:30
on the camera you can clearly see the girl was wearing a00:15:34
hat accuse no evidence no prints no00:15:37
just suspicion knocking who00:15:44
broke this vase phase I accidentally hello00:16:02
hello this00:16:05
and I also need condoms and when of00:16:09
course what kind of condoms will you take00:16:11
ordinary smooth ones with ribs with tendrils with the00:16:15
aroma of lemon lilies of the valley strawberries00:16:17
Japanese 7 h and sirenia which ones00:16:19
do you prefer all of this you have of00:16:21
course no sorry with the aroma serial00:16:25
no recently ran out of amateurs very00:16:27
popular but they brought a box of00:16:30
condoms that glow in the dark00:16:32
you are00:16:33
wondering why they are fussing to pull and hands00:16:36
you are help in the event of an unexpected00:16:38
escape, this is the court's hands, well, of course,00:16:42
people really like to surprise, to be surprised,00:16:44
especially popular lately, you00:16:46
know, you know, you can't tear it with a00:16:48
tax man figurine, a00:16:49
set of stickers with the inscription00:16:53
verified, you can also leg, this is any00:16:55
part of the body, please give no, don’t,00:16:58
you know, I need simple condoms, but00:17:02
only black, but why00:17:06
black, you know,00:17:09
my mistress’s husband died,00:17:15
this is so great00:17:26
Denmark, I’m teaching,00:17:27
I read, I read, I just forgot the00:17:31
tambourine, I can’t give you more than00:17:37
a two, and you can’t give me a deuce, not for a deuce for00:17:42
me next month it was00:17:44
too much to go to the dorm then there was a simple question on00:17:49
Ilya's00:17:51
third law of Newton, because if those00:17:57
three well-known laws of00:18:01
Newton's third law of action, the force of action, the force of00:18:09
those actions of force is equal to the force of action, you00:18:26
almost guessed right, you want to leave what to gel about00:18:32
what lectures were given00:18:38
lectures in physics00:18:42
they read00:18:46
Krusha00:18:49
then they were read by00:18:54
young people and the question is you00:19:06
goodbye hostel00:19:15
oh damn Masha in the theater it’s still cool00:19:19
yes it’s good that you went after yesterday’s00:19:22
binge I wanted something so00:19:23
cultural you love loyal00:19:30
and this is a drama theater here drama00:19:34
I’m cooking a crazy drama any everything is like life00:19:38
love laziness with tonsils who00:19:40
don’t yell at each other this is what I wanted in00:19:43
the provinces real checks good00:19:45
level here is the blonde and the dance eating00:19:49
good level of the Czechs the writer he00:19:51
wrote all this I understood I understood the author of00:19:53
Chekhov’s play enter here they will call the bones oem00:19:58
when listen no I don’t care what the difference is it does00:20:01
n’t matter at all the main thing is that after this00:20:04
you, well, that’s the cotton wool that everything surrounds us,00:20:07
we are still ready to reach out to the beautiful things for00:20:09
the eyes, so let’s go now00:20:13
let’s go somewhere for a drink, she told me00:20:16
after the first act it took my heart so why are00:20:18
you doing this? don’t you remember00:20:20
this handsome man it’s unrealistic he dies in front of00:20:23
me hear it’s not in vain that the theater00:20:27
went alo yes where from the car dealership00:20:36
the car came from00:20:38
what kind of car silver car00:20:44
knife outfit the husband that long development00:20:46
day has not drunk00:20:49
100:20:51
such bright heads with you and00:20:53
now we’ll go to the spa culturally00:21:02
judged stand up,00:21:05
present to the court Viktor, hello00:21:10
Viktor Tvorozhkov Gennadievich00:21:15
Viktor Genych, you know what you00:21:17
are accusing of,00:21:18
well, yes, we know, you plead guilty, well, I do00:21:22
n’t exactly admit it, well, since they are accused, it means I’m00:21:24
guilty, but for me, I’m not guilty,00:21:28
well,00:21:30
tell the court your version of the events00:21:32
that happened on January 26 of this year but there00:21:37
he says and nothing, Seryoga and I,00:21:40
who is the victim, played preference, I00:21:44
mean hearts,00:21:45
he’s a trump card, right, I mean hearts, he’s a trump card00:21:49
again, I mean hearts again, he’s a00:21:52
trump card again, I mean hearts and he’s 1 hour you’re a00:21:56
hero.00:22:02
I did so and00:22:12
decided where we will spend our honeymoon in00:22:14
Italy. Well, zoechka, let’s first00:22:18
decide on00:22:19
a year, we’ll have a wedding, it00:22:22
will depend on whether we will have a honeymoon00:22:24
in Italy or it will be a modest00:22:26
honeymoon week here, to a strange one,00:22:30
you already know what a modest Italian00:22:32
restaurant with your eyes, you are my sunshine, but in00:22:35
Moscow the needs of large Italian00:22:36
restaurants in Moscow in general there are no00:22:38
modest restaurants, all modesty00:22:41
begins 40 kilometers away, then ok, well,00:22:49
let's find some inexpensive00:22:51
restaurant that serves spaghetti,00:22:53
you're like that, I ask you to00:23:06
wash down the appeal with what you're going to do with00:23:10
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