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Download "Иван Абрамов "БОЛЬШОЙ РЕБЁНОК" 2021"

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иван абрамов
ваня абрамов
иван абрамов стендап
иван абрамов 2021
юмор
standup
стэндап
абрамов сольный концерт
абрамов сольник
тнт
standup тнт
stand up new
стендап 2021
квн парапапарам
medium quality
большой ребенок
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  • ruRussian
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00:00:05
this is our Louis
00:00:07
se ka Vanka Abramov common people here are the
00:00:12
lawns
00:00:15
gardener for how many francs did you hire
00:00:17
here for
00:00:19
[music] [applause]
00:00:25
Hey, you don’t mind that I’ll
00:00:28
survive normally right away, I was just studying
00:00:30
when there was a gimo on
00:00:32
[music]
00:00:35
free I don’t want to be the funniest
00:00:39
or the most
00:00:41
intelligent, especially I am inspired to be very
00:00:46
modern I don’t want to be
00:00:50
the most well-mannered on this I put my
00:00:54
protest in agreement with the
00:00:56
city administration I don’t want to offend the feeling of faith
00:01:00
that the Russian Orthodox Church didn’t give up on me I don’t
00:01:04
want to be afraid of the authorities I’m in rag I
00:01:07
don’t intend to remain silent, so I’ll tell you right away that I’m
00:01:12
against Chernenko and Beria, I don’t want an
00:01:17
official to hang orders on my jacket, I did
00:01:21
n’t perform any feats like the great and
00:01:25
valiant
00:01:28
Yurkiss singer, one blow, and all I want,
00:01:35
about the sophisticated
00:01:38
audience, is that I for one of you have become
00:01:42
just a religion
00:01:46
[music]
00:01:59
I need crowds of fans and other
00:02:02
public dramas. Let
00:02:06
the priests just smoke wax near my statues. There is
00:02:09
no need for names of
00:02:13
streets or cities in my honor. Let everything on the planet of Avramov
00:02:18
be as it was
00:02:21
before. I don’t want to assemble a stadium and to be a
00:02:27
conqueror I just want to please
00:02:30
my dear
00:02:35
[music]
00:02:38
psychoanalyst Hello
00:02:42
Nizhny wow
00:02:45
[applause]
00:02:55
wow Okay, thank you guys Thank you very much
00:03:00
Well, you realized at the beginning that it was a joke
00:03:02
Well, that is, I’m not so
00:03:04
narcissistic as a nice man, everything is
00:03:07
much much more Good God it’s
00:03:10
actually much worse for you guys Thank you for the welcome
00:03:12
Thank you for coming, I don’t see you in the back rows,
00:03:15
thank you very much for coming in the
00:03:16
back rows, yes, thank you
00:03:19
very much for coming to the stalls, thank you very much for being
00:03:22
there. May God grant you happiness, health, success
00:03:24
in your work, so important Yes, kids,
00:03:27
so important for me and my girls, you are
00:03:30
my pass, you would be a taste, my good ones,
00:03:33
seriously. Give me the Rafaelkas, you want them.
00:03:35
I have for my always favorite
00:03:38
payment, capable viewers, there are always
00:03:40
Raphaelkas, here you go, my good ones, you
00:03:43
deserve all the Rafaelkas with a name on each one,
00:03:47
thank you for 3 from by mower
00:03:49
Thank you my good ones Thank you my good ones
00:03:52
please so the back rows
00:03:56
[music]
00:03:58
dokinuti
00:04:00
not [music]
00:04:01
[applause]
00:04:05
dokinuti works the force of attraction to
00:04:07
the rich can you imagine so we have in the
00:04:10
man what is your name Alend Alexander
00:04:13
amazing name
00:04:16
agree amazing name You know what from
00:04:19
ancient Greek Alexander is translated
00:04:22
as not such a sycophant as Ivan you knew
00:04:24
at all Sash can be passed along the rows But
00:04:27
no further than the sixth okay
00:04:30
San hold hold hold hold you can oh
00:04:34
wealth My God so the first row in
00:04:38
an hour they will serve you hot food Okay
00:04:43
okay
00:04:45
someone from the back rows will come down
00:04:47
will serve you okay, like this, in fact, the
00:04:50
back rows, don’t be offended by me, I
00:04:55
came especially for you, in all seriousness, 3 hours in advance, I was deliberately confused
00:04:56
and right now put your hand under your
00:04:59
seat I’m in full serenity, put your
00:05:02
hand under your seat, they put it in this
00:05:05
your place
00:05:06
remember remember so that
00:05:08
Alexander and I don’t get lost later
00:05:10
you understand So in fact you
00:05:13
ask me Ivan Why did you start
00:05:17
your solo concert at the age of 34 with the song
00:05:19
throwing candy into the hall you what what
00:05:21
33 Nyusha Seriously what But next the
00:05:24
Barbarika ensemble will not just perform for the people
00:05:26
You know, I’m like that in life, big Reno That
00:05:29
is, this is when the inner age doesn’t
00:05:35
correlate
00:05:55
with yours, I respect whoever threw the second row Yes, I’m like that, you know, I’m just a big child in life. That is, this is when the internal age doesn’t correlate with your Well, real age I’m up to I
00:05:57
still play computer games,
00:05:59
I’m a fan of computer games Bloodborne Dark
00:06:02
Souls 3 The Witcher 3 unch 4 for the majority
00:06:07
That’s who doesn’t applaud, yes for most
00:06:09
of you these are just words, but for me these are
00:06:12
11 joysticks broken against the wall,
00:06:14
you understand because I pressed the block,
00:06:16
[ __ ] you
00:06:17
I jumped and then my daughter daughter close the door
00:06:21
dad is working and then I sit and think God
00:06:24
what am I doing in general I’m 34 years old I have
00:06:27
two children with a higher education and I just
00:06:30
have to go through this
00:06:33
[ __ ] if only for the sake of
00:06:35
[music] the
00:06:38
children what they said later at school And my
00:06:41
dad works at Lukoil and my dad
00:06:43
completed The Witcher 3 on a dress o I have been
00:06:46
a fan of computer games since childhood I
00:06:48
remember as a child you know, I only
00:06:50
roared twice directly at an explosion,
00:06:52
this is when my favorite
00:06:54
parrot died And when I completed Fallout 2 I
00:06:58
remember my parents
00:06:59
[applause]
00:07:01
I remember my parents went to the dacha for a week.
00:07:03
I just played this game all the time for
00:07:05
a week and forgot to feed the parrot,
00:07:08
just yes, you remember, even everyone played
00:07:11
computer games in ninety-five and
00:07:12
ninety-six. It was just magic,
00:07:14
who didn’t have it computer games went to
00:07:16
these computer clubs, remember where there was
00:07:18
one computer for everyone at which
00:07:20
this Lord was sitting, around him stood behind him the
00:07:23
dross of his retinue, this is where you know,
00:07:26
by the height of the shoulder you could determine
00:07:28
the level of nerdiness,
00:07:29
that is, this is how it is, well, a novice Gamer is
00:07:31
like this already experienced And so you don’t need sex, you don’t
00:07:35
need it Well, remember these creatures I
00:07:37
think they used them to draw The Walking Dead
00:07:39
at one time, only these were standing and they
00:07:42
constantly told the horse Vov, well, he lifted Well,
00:07:45
yes, and I Vov Well, as much as possible, but it
00:07:49
seems to me that these guys grew up and somewhere
00:07:50
they work in a non-systemic opposition, they stand
00:07:53
near the walls of the Kremlin and Vova, well,
00:07:57
I got as good as I can
00:07:59
[applause]
00:08:01
[music]
00:08:05
remember Gamers This is the feeling when you
00:08:08
play an unrealistically interesting game for 9 hours in a row
00:08:10
In this position Yes,
00:08:12
to minimize the pressure on the urinary tract,
00:08:14
we remember Wow, during this time you
00:08:16
have even grown a little more because the
00:08:17
hemorrhoids have also grown, dad comes in and
00:08:20
says this 9:00 pm another 5 minutes
00:08:23
and go to sleep Got it Got it then you play
00:08:26
after 5 minutes look at the clock there already 5 in
00:08:28
the morning
00:08:30
and at the same time the door behind you opens and
00:08:35
baht you have a [ __ ] conscience And at that moment you were
00:08:41
just trying to give yourself a stroke
00:08:44
that dad felt sorry for you in the
00:08:46
end I
00:08:49
remember everything at that moment remember Gamers
00:08:52
on such a nifty there was a scorpion subziro there
00:08:54
I was standing Andrey
00:08:56
Georgievich And we told him that he needed to go to
00:08:58
bed,
00:09:00
we told him Andrei
00:09:04
Georgievich, but he didn’t listen to us at all.
00:09:07
So, I swear I never understood. What does
00:09:11
conscience have to do with it? Well, who did I
00:09:14
let down? And why did you drown your childhood for shuka
00:09:16
seriously, seriously Most
00:09:18
of all, I swear I didn’t understand
00:09:20
my dad’s logic when I remember something I didn’t
00:09:23
want to eat soup at lunch and he told me I didn’t
00:09:24
understand humor or what,
00:09:30
how did you even come to this conclusion
00:09:33
dad I have a Natalya Arera poster in my room that I
00:09:35
can use like
00:09:37
double-sided
00:09:42
tape, aka a graveyard of flies How did you even
00:09:46
come I just don’t want to eat soup I
00:09:49
just painted my lips these fat
00:09:51
streaks here didn’t fall in vain yours yes yes, by the way,
00:09:55
about computer games
00:09:57
they say that this is partly evil I agree
00:09:59
because partly from -for
00:10:00
computer games I read very little as a child,
00:10:02
practically didn’t read at all That
00:10:04
is, I started reading actively somewhere after
00:10:05
D de OK But on the other hand,
00:10:10
let’s honestly look at things, that’s what is
00:10:12
objectively more interesting for a teenager there
00:10:14
from 9 to 17 years your base was attacked you
00:10:18
defeated the dragon you found a sword e caliber or it was getting
00:10:21
dark near
00:10:23
the church in the juniper the
00:10:27
crickets were chirping suddenly in the juniper a
00:10:34
shork was heard it was the spring of the kopel drumming on the
00:10:41
[music]
00:10:47
leaves of the Spring Kopel I thought it was a
00:10:51
playful wind tickling the crowns of the
00:10:54
children And this is the Spring Kopel even knowing the
00:10:59
ending of my virginity, I don’t even
00:11:02
know. It seems to me that it’s generally useless to
00:11:04
read the classics of Russian writers at school.
00:11:07
Because when a teenager reads the
00:11:09
brilliant Anna Karenina, at that
00:11:11
moment he thinks not about the internal torment of
00:11:13
Anna’s experiences of her husband about the fact that I’m a [ __ ] for
00:11:15
another 700 pages,
00:11:21
but from of which 600 are not dialogues
00:11:25
damn when after each Read the chapter T
00:11:29
sko we have already
00:11:31
read And as much as you remember and
00:11:34
each time there was the same amount of infection left
00:11:36
But I had the complete feeling that I was
00:11:39
reading I went to bed at night Tolstoy came and
00:11:43
added something at once I remember Personally, I’m here discouraged
00:11:46
the love of reading, this is the list of
00:11:47
required literature for the summer, remember
00:11:50
this list so that we forget over the summer What
00:11:52
is in the summer Here
00:11:56
[applause] I’m
00:11:57
not mistaken in the summer 600 months I
00:12:00
understand correctly 600 then still a
00:12:03
Russian-Finnish Dictionary so that
00:12:05
knowledge makes you fart and swell
00:12:08
then one of you came on September 1 and Maria
00:12:11
Ivanovna I’m
00:12:14
all firstly I’m blue here
00:12:17
and secondly and what do you understand I want to kill
00:12:21
you Maria
00:12:22
Ivanovna Why Because I’m a
00:12:26
trembling creature or have the right
00:12:31
[music]
00:12:34
I’m blue your class teacher,
00:12:37
ranks are given by people Yes, people can be
00:12:41
deceived, blue will imprison you You
00:12:43
understand Let him imprison then the horseradish will be
00:12:48
pulled out, wait and where is this from Turnip
00:12:52
epigraph I’m a [ __ ] You
00:12:56
know everything, yes In fact, I know why
00:12:59
right now I’m reading with pleasure
00:13:02
because no one is forcing me to
00:13:04
read I’m reading everything now and it’s the
00:13:06
only thing for me Well, so far That’s
00:13:08
the only thing that’s hard for you to read
00:13:10
plays, why when you’re reading a play,
00:13:13
you constantly
00:13:15
go back to the beginning for the first 120 pages to understand who
00:13:18
is who in this
00:13:21
rich personalities of the works, she
00:13:24
called out to Vasilisa This is wonderful
00:13:27
Vasilisa - This is who
00:13:29
Kostylev’s wife is and Kostylev is
00:13:32
who Vasilis’ husband is. You’re a creature, of course. But in
00:13:36
general, why am I reading all this to
00:13:40
stretch the cervical collar area or something, oh
00:13:43
yes, I’m a child inside Yes, there is such a scourge,
00:13:46
but at the same time, I am a father
00:13:49
two children I’m the head of a family like an adult,
00:13:52
pretend to be an adult
00:13:55
Yes, don’t get high from the fact that you’re adults,
00:13:57
no, I get so high that I’m an adult, you know,
00:14:00
sometimes I can barely restrain myself so as
00:14:02
not to tell my daughters. But I can eat a waffle before the
00:14:09
soup and I don’t give a damn who will do what.
00:14:12
It’s clear. The main thing is for mom don’t say that
00:14:16
’s all, but I understand that now it’s not fashionable
00:14:19
to be a family man, now it’s fashionable to be
00:14:20
childfree, to live without children and, in principle,
00:14:22
you know such a word as semeni Nuno, there’s
00:14:24
some kind of disdainful
00:14:25
attitude. Why, for example, there’s a
00:14:27
biker on a long road without children in a leather
00:14:29
jacket on a motorcycle this is really cool, this is
00:14:31
just a man, but Senin in a minivan, this is well, but the
00:14:34
man’s lips are not chapped, it’s
00:14:37
also good why all bikers have a
00:14:39
long time ago unspoken rock anthem represented by
00:14:42
di highway to hell, the most powerful song
00:14:46
highway to hell And we have Senino but at
00:14:49
best, the Dune group Borka is a
00:14:51
womanizer, in short, guys, Semyonina to all the
00:14:54
morning wolves of the family front,
00:14:57
dedicated to
00:15:01
two child seats in the back
00:15:03
seat, someone vomited on the floor,
00:15:07
cookies, the children woke us up at 6 in the morning, but
00:15:13
I’m in a
00:15:15
[ __ ] mood, but on the highway I’m rushing as fast as I can
00:15:20
the king of the middle
00:15:23
row curls from my bow
00:15:27
nipple it was we who did the
00:15:31
hairstyle of our beads the color of
00:15:35
plum Because the
00:15:38
red lips are so beautiful like in a
00:15:42
brothel because Dad
00:15:46
Sowing knees hundreds and
00:15:50
frogs Dad yesterday was
00:15:53
a horse with me a man on the porch caught up with me
00:15:57
I feel sorry for his happy
00:16:01
face he’s riding somewhere for the women in the hamam And
00:16:05
we're in France, count you in
00:16:08
oshen, there you are in the hamam from the strap-ons And I'm completely
00:16:16
understood I would endlessly
00:16:19
flog those who invented the
00:16:24
ll dolls and personally tore off
00:16:27
the ass of all those who created Lady Baga
00:16:32
Let the author of My little
00:16:35
pony on face sit horses and kinder surprise cart
00:16:42
will find chlamydia in the egg
00:16:46
and again my old friend is
00:16:50
sitting on the porche urologist With a sad
00:16:54
face Let me give you advice bro
00:16:59
How to avoid sexually transmitted diseases have
00:17:03
your children and then you won’t [ __ ]
00:17:06
You
00:17:07
[applause]
00:17:09
never but soon The children
00:17:12
will grow up and they’ll create their own families,
00:17:17
I’ll buy a bike, I’ll take a
00:17:20
leather jacket and my wife, where should I go
00:17:25
[music]
00:17:27
I rushed [
00:17:28
music] the
00:17:29
shitty floor as a symbol of
00:17:33
humility I’m going alone with the children to the children’s
00:17:37
department, this is the
00:17:41
real one
00:17:48
[applause]
00:17:57
Highway this is Vanyan’s table with
00:18:01
chips in the world and this is himself We have
00:18:05
Vanya sitting at the game,
00:18:07
he’s what kind of game we have, I
00:18:16
’ll do
00:18:21
it now and Nastya is my wife, she’s the
00:18:25
same age as me But she and I are completely different
00:18:28
people inside. That is, if I’m such a
00:18:30
big child inside, you know, then my wife, you know
00:18:33
Here she is, she’s just an adult, an adult. That is,
00:18:36
she doesn’t like to play computer games,
00:18:38
what a waste of time, you know, she
00:18:41
loves watching TV in the evenings
00:18:44
and Larochka Valley is taking off weight loss,
00:19:01
she Well, Leshchenko just pumps, she pumps, you can
00:19:05
see right away that she’s hypertensive from God right
00:19:08
away, and you know, My wife, she an adult
00:19:11
adult from the century before last
00:19:13
because she sometimes inserts such words into her speech
00:19:16
recently they come from work
00:19:17
and say Listen, I’m at work today just
00:19:19
like a Savraska
00:19:21
who Who is like a Savraska at work El At
00:19:25
what job in the museum of Russian architecture
00:19:27
where do you work in general I swear when the new
00:19:30
one she's wearing a sweater She's looking and talking about the
00:19:32
real
00:19:34
Prince Prince and I'm wearing
00:19:37
sweaters to the reception of the King of Belarus
00:19:40
[ __ ] up How
00:19:42
old are you How old are you and the Savraska prince
00:19:46
I think I'm listed in her phone
00:19:48
as My betrothed mummer and for his
00:19:51
birthday So for the future she asked for an
00:19:53
iPhone last models here
00:19:55
Unfortunately, we didn’t say I want a bag of yarn
00:19:59
so that I can knit a sweater for you overseas,
00:20:04
it’s called No, he says I want an iPhone 12
00:20:07
Max for 500 gigs with three cameras or
00:20:09
what a fool or something
00:20:12
and the beautiful girls will laugh at me Yes, I
00:20:16
don’t feel sorry for anything for her, but I it seems
00:20:18
when I give her an iPhone she I love
00:20:21
Ivan or please don’t go
00:20:29
better look at how Lyuba Uspenskaya
00:20:32
has transformed go oh really a miracle yudo
00:20:34
fishermen are you really yes 13 years my
00:20:38
wife and I have already been in sorrow and in joy It was
00:20:40
she who taught me this rollicking joke
00:20:52
[music]
00:20:59
you know, the last time I actually
00:21:02
did this movement with passion
00:21:05
when I
00:21:10
was trying to achieve it I was already sweating at some
00:21:14
point. God, how sinful it is
00:21:17
to do it half the night. Nightmare. Well, it’s just that after
00:21:20
10 years of marriage, you know, kissing becomes
00:21:22
more practical than romantic, we
00:21:25
just kiss her sometimes and El I
00:21:27
think your
00:21:29
six-piece has come off like a filling, but I’ll
00:21:33
put it in later Yes, I’ve already
00:21:35
put you in, no need to Yes, as they say in
00:21:38
Begbeder’s book, remember Where did the
00:21:40
expression come from that love lives for 3 years,
00:21:42
then it all turns into a habit? I
00:21:44
swear when I didn’t understand So what’s
00:21:46
wrong Well, I’m in a good habit
00:21:49
now Well, I’m more or less happy with everything
00:21:52
Well, I’m used to my wife, she doesn’t need a
00:21:55
new one I already know that pork is
00:21:57
bad But if the dumplings are mixed with
00:22:00
beef then Oh, we didn’t know, I already
00:22:02
know that, I don’t need a new woman, the
00:22:05
most important thing is, do I love her the same as
00:22:07
when I met her? Well, naturally, No, well,
00:22:10
naturally, that’s how I love her now,
00:22:13
I personally, and in the end, she’s
00:22:15
much more satisfied with the girl, this is for you,
00:22:17
this initial period in a relationship
00:22:19
is called the candy-bouquet period, for
00:22:21
us, for men, this is a period of a lot of deflections
00:22:24
and
00:22:26
concessions and
00:22:30
I You know, my favorite group is Casta and
00:22:34
mine And what is your favorite Kaz song And
00:22:38
yours Oh, I have jealousy and
00:22:41
mine is this yeah jealousy
00:22:49
jealousy Where did you
00:22:55
go yo [ __ ]
00:22:59
[applause]
00:23:05
I despised myself I did everything
00:23:07
for the sake of my wife to call her heart
00:23:09
that candy bouquet of yours I
00:23:11
remember every weekend I went to her
00:23:13
dorm to repair some shelves Although in life
00:23:16
I myself have never held a drill in my hands But
00:23:18
my hands seemed to be telling me
00:23:19
Vanya, we really need this girl,
00:23:22
especially since I can’t handle Vanya anymore.
00:23:29
I remember, you know, instead of watching the
00:23:32
decisive match of the Champions League, Spartak
00:23:34
Dynamo Kiev went to some
00:23:36
student performance where you can imagine
00:23:38
her talented Friend plays
00:23:44
[music] the
00:23:46
wind and then Well, did you guys
00:23:48
like it Oh lol I’m delighted and
00:23:56
I know in this candy-bouquet period
00:23:59
I looked at my wife and just couldn’t get enough
00:24:02
of you know I just looked I
00:24:04
understand for many guys it’s very
00:24:07
romantic and I looked at the snotty one and couldn’t get enough of course,
00:24:10
not as snotty
00:24:12
romantically as I love cunnilingus, but
00:24:14
nevertheless, if I don’t like him by the way, it’s
00:24:16
clear to you, although no one
00:24:19
ever
00:24:21
asked me,
00:24:26
I know, I just always say El
00:24:30
I think this is what it’s like -it’s
00:24:35
empty Oh, how I don’t want to go back to
00:24:40
Moscow, oh guys, I’ll remember the sushi in my mouth right away
00:24:44
Oh, by the way, I have a song for a very
00:24:48
insecure person to play
00:24:50
the synthesizer
00:24:51
[music]
00:24:53
seriously In general, I’m very untrue to myself
00:24:58
[music]
00:25:14
but you still don’t I’ll like this
00:25:16
[ __ ]
00:25:18
[applause]
00:25:25
in general yes By the way I’m lucky with my
00:25:28
wife I know her first of all for
00:25:30
that I love her because she’s not a
00:25:32
jealous person at all because first of all she’s
00:25:34
confident in herself but it seems to me by the way
00:25:36
You girls are often jealous of your men
00:25:39
because what is there, well, the guy is scorching hard.
00:25:41
You know, there are such very scorching men
00:25:43
who, when he leaves somewhere from the house, she tells
00:25:45
him where did you go to the
00:25:49
drone, exactly,
00:25:52
and the [ __ ] is already being shaken off little by little
00:25:56
there,
00:26:00
for sure, and there won’t be any prostitutes there,
00:26:06
no And if I call the drone now, no
00:26:11
I have to, and then I’ll call and then I won’t
00:26:14
go, then I’ll deceive you, it’s not me that she
00:26:18
trusts, she just recently said
00:26:19
the honest truth. Listen, in 13 years together, I’ve
00:26:22
never cheated on you, I’ve never gone to the left.
00:26:24
Therefore, you know that I trust you.
00:26:26
Therefore, if you want to go to a striptease,
00:26:29
all night Let's
00:26:37
go I tell El I think I'm on this
00:26:40
day you know I can
00:26:42
never she knows what she's saying Yes Let's go
00:26:44
let's go Po rzhom says Yes no one comes to
00:26:47
meet you to laugh And so that BN look
00:26:50
they're all
00:26:51
naked Oh I'm laughing right up my dick stood up
00:26:56
eating says any man Well, he’ll
00:26:59
tell you that all I’m going to do in
00:27:01
a striptease next to my beloved wife is the appearance
00:27:04
that I’m not interested in all this, that’s
00:27:06
why I need some new tits,
00:27:09
woman Take it away I said what is this,
00:27:13
she turned around and
00:27:20
[applause]
00:27:22
gone Why do I need some new boobs?
00:27:25
If next to me there are
00:27:29
old boobs, tested by two children,
00:27:32
veterans who, without sparing themselves, have come a
00:27:35
long way from now. Until now, why do I need
00:27:37
this
00:27:39
[applause]
00:27:43
tell me everything? Let's get out of here, what are they
00:27:46
hooked on? Let's take it Elka, by the way, it’s
00:27:50
in vain that you stopped wearing a bra. Listen, it’s really
00:27:53
in vain that the girl is not a snake, this is our
00:27:56
second Lord, that’s colostrum and not me,
00:28:01
a fool. In the end, of course, I didn’t go
00:28:04
to any striptease and the honest truth, the
00:28:07
honest truth, I asked her off for an
00:28:09
erotic
00:28:10
massage Yes, girls because that she
00:28:13
loves me and as they say, you love me, let me go for an
00:28:16
erotic massage, it sounds like a complete joke.
00:28:18
If you didn’t know before, she
00:28:21
didn’t know what kind of procedure this was.
00:28:26
She says, Listen, I
00:28:29
understand correctly, this is when you get a masseuse. Well, she
00:28:30
massages, massages, then goes
00:28:33
into another room and you’re already on your own Well,
00:28:36
as they say, you’re bringing me I
00:28:38
say Well, what
00:28:45
else
00:28:48
Elka moreover, when she
00:28:51
massages me You know I’ll close my eyes and
00:28:53
remember our
00:28:55
wedding and By the way, who would
00:28:59
honestly let go of their man, trusting him for
00:29:02
such a massage without intimacy I applaud
00:29:04
honestly Girls who That means you are
00:29:07
modern girls who weren’t afraid
00:29:09
to open your own salons in Nizhny Novgorod
00:29:11
well done well done girls I applaud you Well done
00:29:14
not really you are wise who
00:29:17
applauded because you know any
00:29:19
man This is what any man will appreciate This is this Go of course
00:29:22
anyone a man values ​​you more than I want
00:29:24
children from you, because any man
00:29:26
whose wife lets her go for such a massage, having
00:29:28
already reached this salon at the last
00:29:31
moment, will think Damn, what a
00:29:33
cool wife I have. Yes, I’d better go and buy her a
00:29:36
huge bouquet of flowers, but literally in
00:29:38
an hour
00:29:40
literally so that in a good mood Yes,
00:29:44
with some kind of bouquet if you don’t
00:29:46
like it, and again,
00:29:48
let the girls go, trust the men, everyone
00:29:51
needs this legal emotional release in order not to have
00:29:53
mistresses,
00:29:55
or do you think that every
00:29:57
time after 10 years of marriage, you go to bed
00:30:00
bed with the same woman all the
00:30:01
men think
00:30:03
Wow The
00:30:06
same thing I know by heart the script of our
00:30:09
sex with my wife where it will begin what
00:30:12
positions there will be how my wife will scream at the end
00:30:14
Vanya you fell asleep You have a conscience
00:30:20
Actually I’m here like Sovka, you
00:30:22
understand and he is kicking
00:30:26
ass and we are now trying to diversify
00:30:28
our sex life with his wife because
00:30:30
we love each other. She recently said:
00:30:32
Listen, let’s go to an intimate store. I’m
00:30:34
talking right here, just the two of us. Let’s come in and
00:30:36
Hello. We are desperate.
00:30:39
You’ve made an appointment for the dildo at 5:00 pm.
00:30:42
in my opinion,
00:30:43
even more so Well, we seem to be the right
00:30:46
couple, she has never been to an intimate
00:30:49
store, I was only once in childhood
00:30:51
when I waited out the hail on the street when such
00:30:54
oh-oh-oh-oh oh-oh-oh we are there with her
00:30:58
we’ll look like a typical Soviet
00:31:00
family in a New York store, let’s go in and
00:31:03
look what they
00:31:05
came up with. Yes, look, it looks like a cucumber And you ca
00:31:09
n’t
00:31:13
chop it into a salad, but yes, eh, yes, come on, or
00:31:18
you go alone Well, like, you know what you
00:31:20
want, or I’ll go alone, Give me Just a
00:31:23
list like a
00:31:24
grocery girl, they will show me where
00:31:26
Krasnodar
00:31:29
ended Well, thank you God, as
00:31:31
they say Yes, I understand guys, intimacy is
00:31:34
always such a slippery topic But as a
00:31:37
rule,
00:31:40
90% of marriages are prompted to break up on this topic because people
00:31:43
are embarrassed, people are embarrassed to talk about
00:31:46
this topic to many now in the hall, too, I
00:31:47
know it was awkward even to listen to jokes on
00:31:50
this topic, I’m sure people were sitting there that the
00:31:56
cufflinks were like this grams 300 400 with
00:32:03
Larisa so Marishka in the refrigerator a hundred
00:32:08
he’ll be floating
00:32:10
now We’re waiting for you Andrey Georgievich you’re
00:32:14
late Yes Just need to tsu give on
00:32:17
the phone Okay and everything will be fine, do
00:32:20
n’t be late Well, just go there,
00:32:21
buy the current, bring it to him today, he’s 39 years old, so what
00:32:26
if he’s already an adult? Yes, it was
00:32:31
when I often got burned with girls in
00:32:34
my teens. The fact is that I
00:32:36
was a very naive romantic you know, with
00:32:38
regard to girls, I was often cheated on. I
00:32:40
remember my last drops of
00:32:42
disappointment in girls came when I fell head over
00:32:44
heels in love with one girl and she and I
00:32:47
even wanted to start a family. I met
00:32:48
her in 2005, 19 years old in Gelendzhik in the
00:32:52
summer in
00:32:53
July, Saturday or something. it was Thursday 2310 11
00:32:59
11 and we agree to meet
00:33:02
in Moscow, she was also a Muscovite at that
00:33:03
time and I come to this
00:33:06
girl in Moscow a week later. And it turns out that while
00:33:09
she was waiting for me, she didn’t wait for me twice
00:33:12
and it’s tough when they cheat on you like this
00:33:15
in adolescence, go guys to whom
00:33:17
girls also cheated harshly in their
00:33:20
time,
00:33:25
of course
00:33:29
Nizhny Novgorod This is a city of [ __ ] men,
00:33:32
of course here in the winter they hand over a winter jacket to the wardrobe
00:33:35
and a third egg on Don’t
00:33:37
spill You know that in
00:33:39
French, by the way, there is even a special
00:33:40
term for guys who have never the
00:33:42
girls didn’t cheat, it’s called think
00:33:46
about it, it
00:33:48
appeared in short, it’s very tough Let it
00:33:51
be known to you Lords of the females, it’s
00:33:53
very tough when they cheat in
00:33:55
adolescence We, unlike
00:33:58
girls, cannot fully open our
00:34:00
souls and show that we have no grief here
00:34:02
Every man will take away his grief to the
00:34:05
oncology department No, we can’t,
00:34:08
like girls, we can’t be completely there, we don’t have to
00:34:10
be brutal, for me it was the most
00:34:12
difficult thing, even in this betrayal, not the
00:34:14
fact of betrayal itself, but the fact that you need to
00:34:16
remain brutal, raising this
00:34:18
topic for the first week with your boys. I
00:34:21
remember when on the next day after this
00:34:23
betrayal of the hard sex to her boys about the goth
00:34:26
lesson with mine I say we broke up
00:34:33
seriously Yeah, think about what
00:34:41
she cheated on you, what Yes, not
00:34:45
just slept with someone else
00:34:46
Well, nothing I cheated on her too with
00:34:48
whom Yes, you don’t
00:34:51
know there, I myself don’t yet
00:34:53
I know Now wait a minute, check, are
00:35:00
you crying or what? What's crazy?
00:35:23
just a
00:35:26
stinking [ __ ], can you imagine this is her Sun
00:35:29
oh I remember Tanya Tanya yes Her name was Tanya Tanya
00:35:33
I specially naturally changed the name
00:35:35
because in life she is Nadya
00:35:37
Oh metro Novogireeva Moscow Oh why am I
00:35:40
saying all this and not showing you I
00:35:43
prepared the presentation for the guys So
00:35:44
the main deposits of chlamydia in in the city of
00:35:47
Moscow guys now it’s not really too
00:35:49
much for you Meta that when it’s over
00:35:53
will watch this concert with
00:35:55
her girlfriend the girlfriend would say Well, of
00:35:57
course you are Nadya a fool Tronova Gireeva
00:36:00
Moscow red hair girl surname
00:36:02
Volkova Well of course you’re a fool that would be Nadya
00:36:06
She was sitting so silently, right here,
00:36:08
a tear was dripping. She wouldn’t even wipe it away because she was
00:36:11
paralyzed by my
00:36:14
curses, the scum should burn in hell,
00:36:17
who
00:36:18
thinks so, the scum should burn in hell How long
00:36:24
has it been since then,
00:36:27
15
00:36:28
years, have I forgiven her as an adult and
00:36:32
educated FIG. oil I see Fig with
00:36:36
oil in which the scum will
00:36:40
burn brighter in
00:36:41
hell
00:36:43
[music] more
00:36:44
fun I’m a very, very vindictive
00:36:49
bastard, one [ __ ] in the first grade told me so, I
00:36:55
remember
00:36:59
Lusty and now lives in
00:37:04
Orel I’m a very, very envious
00:37:08
nit I think Dud only calls
00:37:13
morons Only nerds drive a Benley.
00:37:18
But the group Korni Well done.
00:37:22
God bless them with everything average. God bless,
00:37:27
but in general I’m a
00:37:31
good person, I don’t drink and I don’t smoke. My
00:37:36
dishes were a fork on
00:37:41
Kus. In general, it’s just an infuriating
00:37:45
bastard
00:37:48
la-la-la-la-la.
00:37:50
la-la-la-la-la
00:37:53
Lala hanging dishes
00:38:02
- annoying dishes
00:38:07
la-la-la-la la la-
00:38:15
la-la
00:38:17
[music]
00:38:18
annoying
00:38:25
tea
00:38:28
[applause]
00:38:29
[music]
00:38:30
[applause]
00:38:31
[music]
00:38:35
preparations are underway for the New Year today is December 31,
00:38:43
1995 so that dad can help me
00:38:49
dress up [music] take this, plug it into the socket
00:38:52
and check whether the lights are on or
00:38:55
not. In general, as you might have guessed, I’ve been
00:38:59
working hard with psychoanalysts for a year now.
00:39:03
Yes, because I’m tired of my
00:39:07
inner Child. often takes
00:39:09
patronage over me and tells me how I need to
00:39:10
react to events and people
00:39:12
because, as a rule, such traits as
00:39:14
touchiness, excessive envy - these are all
00:39:16
traits characteristic of five-year-old children in
00:39:19
adulthood. Here a person reacts like a
00:39:21
five-year-old child, not because he is
00:39:23
bad, but because that something happened from 0
00:39:26
to 5 years of age, childhood traumas that made
00:39:29
him react here with the same
00:39:31
tools as here and here. According to
00:39:34
psychoanalysis, estimate that every third
00:39:36
adult, due to traumas not
00:39:38
worked through from 0 to 5 years of age, reacts in
00:39:41
adulthood like a five-year-old child,
00:39:42
imagine Every third, now
00:39:44
every third in the hall sits and thinks,
00:39:46
you yourself react like a five-year-old child. It’s
00:39:47
even more understandable. Who calls you names and he’s
00:39:50
called that, it’s clear
00:39:52
that
00:39:54
Dudu, I and my wife are you yourself, and what does it have to do with
00:39:57
working through these childhood traumas?
00:39:59
You need to remember what’s wrong happened to you there
00:40:02
But you yourself will never
00:40:04
remember it It breaks through only through
00:40:06
dreams when the psyche relaxes
00:40:08
unconsciously opens up And all this and you
00:40:10
need to interpret all these dreams
00:40:13
only with the help of a professional
00:40:15
psychoanalyst Because if you
00:40:16
try to interpret your dreams yourself Well,
00:40:19
guys, unfortunately a psychoanalyst is not these
00:40:21
mowers will earn money, alas Unfortunately,
00:40:23
here we are with my
00:40:25
psychoanalysts, all three My main
00:40:28
nightmares are the first. The nightmare of the three that
00:40:30
guys often dream about is mainly when I ca
00:40:32
n’t find my car anywhere in the city. That
00:40:35
is, I remember exactly what I parked
00:40:38
here but I don’t find it at my
00:40:40
heart is beating Although it’s just a car and the
00:40:42
psychoanalyst tells me Ivan And what is
00:40:44
a car I say a vehicle
00:40:46
Ivan a car I say a
00:40:50
vehicle Ivan a car m
00:40:55
mom
00:40:57
you loved your mother so much and fought for
00:41:00
her with your father and older brother that you were afraid
00:41:02
that her they will take you away, you understand,
00:41:05
of course, I paid seven mowers for this,
00:41:07
of course, I understood everything right
00:41:09
away, my second Nightmare out of three, we
00:41:10
understand when I fall into the open sea
00:41:13
and I panic, I hate the open sea,
00:41:15
Ivan says, what is the sea? Well, this is
00:41:17
absence land under my feet and soil under my
00:41:19
feet and I'm afraid that I will be fired from
00:41:21
work and there will be no soil under my feet Ivan the
00:41:23
sea
00:41:25
m
00:41:29
I say, but it seems to me that I can
00:41:33
help myself. I understand the scheme, in my opinion the sea is my
00:41:37
mother, I think that I All my life I’ve been afraid of the
00:41:40
open sea when I remember I lived in
00:41:42
Volgograd and I’m from there myself, I
00:41:44
was standing in a river in the Volga for something,
00:41:45
you know something from my leg So back and forth, back and forth
00:41:47
So I do this sharply with my leg,
00:41:49
jumps out from there such a viper with the phrase,
00:41:51
see you at
00:41:54
the psychoanalyst. Here is such a viper, I answer
00:41:57
how I realized that this is a viper, they
00:41:59
always ask me, I know how they are
00:42:00
different, the snake here has yellow
00:42:03
heels, and that viper here had
00:42:05
a lot of my childhood [ __ ],
00:42:07
even if it wow, it’s
00:42:11
still a snake Guys, a snake is scum and
00:42:14
scum - This is
00:42:16
Nadya, what’s
00:42:18
wrong I know such
00:42:21
snakes, she seems to be non-venomous, not
00:42:24
poisonous, and then the whole area is on
00:42:26
antibiotics I know this, and I also learned
00:42:29
thanks to psychoanalysis that imagine
00:42:31
some dissatisfaction with the authorities Today,
00:42:33
in adult life, for
00:42:35
some, this is also a consequence of
00:42:38
unprocessed childhood traumas. That is, for
00:42:40
example, I am now a very, you know,
00:42:41
reflective
00:42:43
Patriot because
00:42:45
I have a very strict demand for
00:42:48
justice that was unrealized in childhood
00:42:50
because I was very often punished. It
00:42:51
seemed to me unfair and now
00:42:54
people I’m subscribed to Well, everything on
00:42:57
YouTube channels are very different from
00:43:00
adequate to those where they say in Russia it’s
00:43:03
dark at night because Sechin swallowed
00:43:06
the Sun I filter the
00:43:09
information camp and this one but I can’t live without it
00:43:12
I know that it will suck for me but
00:43:14
for it’s real to me, like a drug, I’m from
00:43:16
the very morning about Navalny barking Roizman
00:43:19
Khodorkovsky Lyuba
00:43:22
Sobol then all the sausage I think
00:43:25
God how bad it is in Russia
00:43:27
urgently Solovyova in Ukraine is even
00:43:30
worse
00:43:33
about grace grace di grace like
00:43:38
political jokes and sharp ones I applaud
00:43:40
who loves everything
00:43:43
everything I I love them too But it’s a pity that they do
00:43:46
n’t really change anything in the country,
00:43:48
that is, every time a comedian
00:43:50
jokes sharply about politics in the audience, everyone
00:43:52
laughs very loudly to themselves lately,
00:43:55
and the comedian then receives comments like
00:43:58
Well done Ivan, he wasn’t afraid, we’re waiting for his
00:44:00
performances we’re in a pre-trial detention center and that’s it. That
00:44:03
is, there will simply be one more chanson album in
00:44:06
Russia and everything would be fine. I
00:44:09
really think there, well, these jokes would
00:44:10
change something. Yes, I would write them in batches
00:44:12
then if after each of my sharp
00:44:15
jokes people in power are like that and the whole
00:44:18
guy is
00:44:20
right, maybe he can also ask his wives for time off
00:44:22
erotic massage what do you guys think,
00:44:25
you know I used to think that I was
00:44:27
subscribed to this whole
00:44:29
tuba information flow because like, it’s important to me what’s
00:44:31
happening in my country like I’m a patriot for
00:44:33
real guys I really love Russia I I’m
00:44:35
responsible for Russia, I’ll sell my homeland, so that I can at
00:44:38
least break even in the end result, but from the point of view of
00:44:40
psychoanalysis, think about it. The truth is
00:44:42
that I just, well, I just like
00:44:45
to suffer. Well, I just get my
00:44:48
dose of suffering, don’t do anything about it, and
00:44:51
just go around loading myself up, and that’s the case with us too.
00:44:53
This love of suffering comes from childhood, but
00:44:55
if your parents didn’t beat you in the chest,
00:44:56
well, you actually had parents and bro, did
00:44:59
you at least once say that you raised me? Yes, I
00:45:01
just fell off my bike onto my dad’s
00:45:04
favorite car, I remember Dad said your
00:45:07
God’s soul, mother, and then I don’t
00:45:09
remember anything But Russians in general love
00:45:12
to suffer It’s not even so much you know,
00:45:13
somehow from childhood It seems to me somehow
00:45:16
even historically Yes, as you go, this is us,
00:45:19
we find pleasure in the suffering
00:45:22
we have That’s why these
00:45:23
suffering
00:45:26
I remember in Every family feast at
00:45:28
some point my dad took the floor
00:45:33
and stop eating,
00:45:36
but without you it’s
00:45:42
definitely a pity that Grandfather Mountain doesn’t
00:45:44
see how we’ve all
00:45:47
gathered and many people don’t
00:45:51
see Nikulin
00:45:54
died
00:45:57
Ekri Aunt Olya
00:46:01
went to the toilet and where is she Now I ask
00:46:06
Okay son happy birthday
00:46:10
[applause]
00:46:12
[music]
00:46:15
to you Let's at the same time remember my great-grandmother
00:46:18
The Kingdom of Heaven these were really my
00:46:21
birthdays I
00:46:24
crumple the hope not The beautiful winged swing is
00:46:27
far away but Mikhail Shafutinsky Don’t shoot the
00:46:30
white swans and the tattoo [ __ ] I
00:46:33
remember blowing out the candles not for Happy
00:46:36
birthday but under the candles they cry for people, sometimes
00:46:40
they cry more quietly, sometimes more intensely. I stood near these
00:46:43
candles on the cake and thought, Lord, let the
00:46:54
mother chewed on the cake have a
00:46:58
rectal everyday life, in a positive way,
00:47:01
there are no candles crying for people, and that’s why
00:47:04
you know, for me, Mikhail
00:47:06
Zakharovich Shafutinsky is not some kind of
00:47:08
composer from the zone of thieves' songs
00:47:11
for me this is my favorite children's
00:47:13
composer on a par with such
00:47:15
children's composers as Yuri Entin
00:47:17
Alexey Rybnikov Mikhail Krug That's all My
00:47:21
childhood, the time when I remember I was happy
00:47:23
because I'm in general
00:47:26
because of politics I remember I just
00:47:28
I liked Yeltsin Well, because he was
00:47:31
funny Well, for all the children it was dekh el but he
00:47:34
was Like one of the Smeshariki
00:47:36
there Losyash sheep you understand
00:47:42
remember remember This unique style of
00:47:45
dance of Yeltsin Yes, Yeltsin seems to be dancing and
00:47:48
his entire administration is sweating Remember
00:47:50
my great-grandmother was a fan of Yeltsin I
00:47:53
remember when 87 years old passed away at a
00:47:57
wake, some little boy came up to me
00:47:58
and said Don’t worry,
00:48:02
she’s watching over you
00:48:04
And after that I slept for 2 years with
00:48:10
the lights on, I didn’t
00:48:13
worry Just
00:48:15
outlines
00:48:17
when the chalk ran out I was putting out gray hair Have you
00:48:20
ever slept with the lights
00:48:22
open
00:48:23
through the eyes of the spa, you know, I was just afraid to
00:48:26
close them and open them, and there And the candles are crying for
00:48:30
people and this is how the circumstances developed.
00:48:33
I apologize in advance to the moralist, then the
00:48:36
guys will have straight life, that this
00:48:38
moment of losing my great-grandmother for me as a
00:48:40
teenager was at the same time superimposed on the fact
00:48:42
that I discovered the Amazing
00:48:45
world of wet dreams Who doesn’t know what a wet dream is,
00:48:48
it’s when you dream about Irina Saltykova at night
00:48:50
And in the morning you get stuck in the unpleasant
00:48:54
consequences of this new situation and when this
00:48:56
happens for the first time with guys remember
00:48:58
your feeling We think this is what it is, are
00:49:02
you crazy, I couldn’t do this
00:49:04
they gave me the FSB answer I couldn’t but I couldn’t
00:49:07
tell my parents about it I also
00:49:09
couldn’t because I wasn’t The most
00:49:10
opportune moment after the loss of
00:49:12
my great-grandmother to go into the
00:49:15
halls
00:49:17
of God Trouble doesn’t come
00:49:24
alone
00:49:25
[applause]
00:49:28
because this one won’t come off
00:49:30
Unfortunately about grandma, of course It’s a
00:49:33
pity the blanket, it’s a pity the sheets, it’s a pity the carpet
00:49:41
got caught on one side, but I remember dad. Once he took the
00:49:44
first step, he came up to me and
00:49:46
said something, I didn’t understand
00:49:48
the humor. And that our batteries are all
00:49:50
hung up with your panties. And I didn’t even
00:49:53
find the battery right away, but I was confused. why at
00:49:57
this moment, well, the other panties are
00:50:03
changing there
00:50:07
because the panties are
00:50:09
dirty, he says, I don’t understand the humor. Why the
00:50:13
hell are the panties so often dirty the
00:50:17
third thing in the morning Van Why are the panties dirty
00:50:20
and then I’m embarrassed to talk about this
00:50:22
topic Yes, to the stupidest unpopular
00:50:26
answer to the question why are the panties dirty?
00:50:29
If at that moment I had participated in the
00:50:30
program 100 to
00:50:31
one, Gurevich would have told me. So Ivano,
00:50:34
answer to the question why the panties are dirty, you
00:50:36
would have answered because they are involved in
00:50:38
corruption schemes; by the way, this was the
00:50:41
second stupidest option; the answer you
00:50:42
earned was 15 points 15 points but you
00:50:46
answered dad because every
00:50:48
time I forget to wipe my
00:50:54
ass Well, mourning Yes, mourning is understandable, mourning
00:50:58
yes yes And you earned childhood trauma for
00:51:01
life, this is amazing and then dad
00:51:03
remembers saying, so wait a minute, you’re a
00:51:05
teenager you just had a wet dream,
00:51:08
I say I mean, what kind of wet dream, I did
00:51:10
n’t
00:51:12
do anything Moreover, it was a single picket,
00:51:16
actually, he says a fool, a wet dream is
00:51:20
when a teenager has salty codes through an erotic dream
00:51:22
Well, Hello
00:51:27
Irishki, this release of
00:51:29
excess hormones occurs I say, that is
00:51:31
I don’t have any incontinence says Yes
00:51:33
no of course That is, it’s normal yes Oh
00:51:36
then Prepare
00:51:39
the battery Something is cutting me off You know
00:51:41
very much yes guys This is life That’s the way
00:51:44
I had
00:51:46
[music]
00:51:50
life it didn’t always consist of
00:51:52
classical
00:51:54
music it will be from this easier Every time
00:51:57
I had fields I
00:52:00
was like Holy crap yes and you
00:52:04
can actually ask me Ivan Aren’t you
00:52:06
ashamed we have been at
00:52:09
Ivan Abramov’s concert for almost an hour and have never
00:52:11
heard how much you love the film The Three
00:52:14
Musketeers Ivan
00:52:17
yes maybe it’s time to please
00:52:20
us with your jokes about opol By the way, who did
00:52:22
n’t know that I’m a fan of Dumas The Three
00:52:24
Musketeers
00:52:26
means guys Tomorrow at 7:00 at the
00:52:28
monastery we agreed Not really,
00:52:30
who didn’t know I Guys, I’m a hard fan of The Three
00:52:32
Musketeers at home there are figurines
00:52:36
hand-painted by me of all the
00:52:38
characters, the tin figurines are clean, and the
00:52:41
mini Boyarsky is like the one in the film
00:52:43
Anniversary diorama of the Musketeers, you
00:52:46
know them, so they’re probably all on the shelf in
00:52:47
the form of a phrase, in my opinion it’s too much in No, these are
00:52:50
all my horcruxes, I just adore them I’ve
00:52:53
been collecting them for a long time. I remember one time
00:52:55
recently. My youngest daughter Alina
00:52:58
broke a sword from a collectible
00:53:00
d’artagnan, just such a small sword
00:53:01
from such a small d’artagnan that
00:53:03
cost almost 55,000 rubles. Although I
00:53:06
told you, daughter, be careful, dad
00:53:08
was waiting for six months for a figurine from France, a month
00:53:10
later I painted it myself and you take it and
00:53:12
break it overnight In the end, she took it
00:53:14
Just like that, she broke it and
00:53:16
Oh I say Okay, it happens [ __ ] go to
00:53:21
sleep go [ __ ] yourself baby
00:53:30
baby go Dad needs to
00:53:35
break the wall but I personally remember I fell in love with
00:53:39
this movie because of the music remember the music
00:53:41
Maxim Isaakovich Dunaevsky
00:53:43
brilliant music what was it worth just
00:53:45
this one thing Holy
00:53:46
[ __ ] remember here
00:53:51
Athos's ballad the scene when Athos tells his
00:53:53
story of
00:53:54
Dartagnan
00:53:56
One of my friends Count Defer fell in love with a
00:54:00
girl as beautiful as love itself and
00:54:03
Darton at that moment looks at him like that
00:54:05
No because the actor is
00:54:06
acting out no Because the [ __ ] is really
00:54:09
interesting because this is
00:54:11
intense music and
00:54:14
the voice of Athos, beaten by fate, creates a powerful intrigue but
00:54:16
you are really interested in listening I would
00:54:18
listen to all the audiobooks it
00:54:24
was skiy my
00:54:27
friend and Spring drops drum on the corpse of
00:54:31
my lady I will remember I would listen to everything and
00:54:38
remember
00:54:41
we won and remember this melody,
00:54:45
depending on the tension of the film,
00:54:47
was played on two instruments on the
00:54:49
organ and this kick
00:54:54
drum years later when Dartagnan found out
00:54:57
that it turns out today Zenit [ __ ] up
00:55:01
[applause]
00:55:02
remember the ruble I put on the
00:55:08
homeless cool music was very cool
00:55:11
and you know, I don’t want to, as if on the other
00:55:13
hand, he says that modern
00:55:15
music is not the same, no, modern music is
00:55:17
very cool I adore modern music,
00:55:20
I understand it completely, I really
00:55:21
like Oksimiron cryptofit, I adore
00:55:23
all of Morgenstern’s albums, who
00:55:25
loves Morgenstern applauds That
00:55:28
means tomorrow mother in this monastery, too,
00:55:30
come too, too, also seven Yes, no, in
00:55:34
fact, who doesn’t know who Morgenstern is
00:55:36
- this is now the most popular character on
00:55:38
YouTube at the time, Roma Acorn, who is this
00:55:41
exactly the most popular I hope the character
00:55:45
on YouTube can, you know,
00:55:47
treat creativity differently Margenstern
00:55:49
must admit that he is a very cool
00:55:50
showman That is, he recently had a case.
00:55:53
Many people know for sure when he
00:55:55
was recording a track for Titi as part of a
00:55:57
joint duet and the music track
00:56:00
when he was recording the track at that moment
00:56:01
he farted into
00:56:02
the microphone, left it all sent to Timati
00:56:05
Timati did not tell him anything to the couple once
00:56:07
Sang in the end it all turned out Timati
00:56:09
came with his friends Morgenstern
00:56:11
apologized Well, we, as adults,
00:56:13
understand that it was just a very cool
00:56:15
move Well, so that people downloaded all this on itun,
00:56:18
listened, it’s
00:56:23
here
00:56:28
again or he
00:56:31
vomited, I didn’t actually go to
00:56:33
Morgenstern concert but to have an
00:56:35
open area good exhaust you know
00:56:39
another performer with pleasure guys
00:56:41
who is against with pleasure recently
00:56:44
Khabib Nurmagomedov you know yes he said that
00:56:46
Morgenstern is dirt and I completely
00:56:49
agree with Khabib I believe that
00:56:51
Morgenstern completely agrees with Khabib
00:56:55
Because when you Well, Khabib
00:56:57
Nurmagomedov says that you are
00:56:59
dirt, well, it’s unlikely you’ll tell him.
00:57:02
Justify him. But
00:57:05
here, most likely, you’ll tell him.
00:57:08
I want to. Justify why I’m dirt. And yes,
00:57:11
Margenstern is dirt, it’s possible. Well,
00:57:14
children love dirt; dig in the dirt;
00:57:16
jump in a puddle; smear the door with Instagram,
00:57:19
remember Well, we were all children, and
00:57:21
now Morgenstern
00:57:23
earns a lot of money like Vlad
00:57:26
A4 paper like Danya Milokhin because it’s
00:57:29
not us adults who like him, but children. And
00:57:32
children set trends because,
00:57:34
unlike us, notorious
00:57:35
adults are able to broadcast their preferences
00:57:38
outside by imposing your tastes at least
00:57:41
when speaking Mom, buy a ticket to Neleto
00:57:43
Who is Neleto and after 5 minutes the mother
00:57:46
already knows who Neleto is, she likes him, she does
00:57:48
n’t like him in her head My favorite is
00:57:52
forever and I understand children, we didn’t need
00:57:55
complex forms back then in childhood Me
00:57:58
too as a child, I remember arguing about what kind of
00:58:00
books when there are not books.
00:58:04
Why come up with a complex thought when you do
00:58:07
n’t have to come up with a complex thought? I
00:58:11
understand children, I also understand that
00:58:13
today it’s unlikely that teenage children there will
00:58:16
read Dumas’s book The Three Musketeers, much
00:58:19
less rewatch the 1979 film
00:58:20
Our Soviet Me
00:58:22
I understand this, but I also want you to know
00:58:25
your preferences outside, so I
00:58:27
tried to explain in the language of teenagers
00:58:28
as primitively as possible Who
00:58:31
is who in The Three Musketeers Well, a
00:58:35
file
00:58:37
like
00:58:38
[music]
00:58:39
would be great Who is ready to play with me
00:58:44
Tell me
00:58:46
[music]
00:58:47
about Who doesn’t know what it is ro Tell me
00:58:53
what now One for all and
00:58:56
[applause]
00:59:00
[music]
00:59:12
everything
00:59:14
Aramis is
00:59:17
crash rochefort - this is
00:59:20
cringe Athos - this is true
00:59:25
Constance
00:59:28
Au chilier - this is an
00:59:31
abuser Mazarin - this is a
00:59:35
loser marda - this is
00:59:38
drain
00:59:39
rdi
00:59:41
Positive Why is everyone here moving Duke of
00:59:45
Buckingham in
00:59:49
[music]
00:59:53
Paris
00:59:56
[music]
01:00:02
buckingham is
01:00:04
power buckingham is hype Damn the
01:00:09
Queen is his
01:00:12
milf and Louis and hu kol tetri Vil
01:00:18
is
01:00:19
Boomer Dartagnan is a
01:00:23
zoomer milady is a
01:00:26
skin milady is a
01:00:30
[ __ ] feminist toxie gel This
01:00:33
woman has many names
01:00:40
[ music]
01:00:49
Igor Starygin Vladimir balon kevich Oleg
01:00:53
Tabakov sherk Radikovich Avilov Nobody is forgotten
01:00:56
nothing is forgotten Thank you all
01:00:58
for a happy childhood in our hearts you
01:01:00
remained forever and as the
01:01:02
movie rank speaks about One his mother for all and
01:01:10
[music]
01:01:14
all the grove
01:01:19
Nizhny Alager com alager
01:01:22
[music]
01:01:26
one My friend Ivan
01:01:29
Abramov got [ __ ] in the film The Three
01:01:33
Musketeers when asked why I am so in love
01:01:36
with Athos Porthos Ramis and Dartagnan
01:01:40
the psychoanalyst answered Ivan Ivan Who
01:01:43
are they
01:01:46
[applause]
01:01:48
[music]
01:01:53
Musketeers
01:01:58
[applause]
01:02:05
Thank you honestly
01:02:07
thank you thank you thank you guys thank you I
01:02:09
would even say Mercy side knead side
01:02:13
imagine all this time I was wearing an
01:02:15
invisible hat and how I pinned you
01:02:19
more carefully more
01:02:21
carefully I bet they did
01:02:23
n’t notice you at the concert either quietly quietly quietly
01:02:28
quietly I by the way was against such moronic
01:02:30
jokes, it’s clear to you all I was against but
01:02:33
my inner child told me that
01:02:35
it’s damn it. It’s very funny if in the
01:02:37
end there will be an invisible horse, you’ll still end up
01:02:39
in the
01:02:43
ass
01:02:47
[applause]
01:02:53
Vitali
01:02:56
just galloped away, the adequacy from
01:02:58
my concert was seen I hope she
01:03:01
galloped off to lie on the Nizhny Novgorod
01:03:02
Perekopny roads and Parks where else has a horse
01:03:05
not been lying
01:03:06
[applause]
01:03:17
Oh my favorite ombre he found out about the
01:03:21
problems of the city and stuck it into the concert
01:03:23
I love I hope everything will work out with the anniversary
01:03:26
by the way for the future of you
01:03:28
[applause]
01:03:30
too Yes my inner Child often
01:03:34
bothers me I get offended by someone I come up with
01:03:37
such childish ones gags but sometimes you
01:03:39
know he, this inner child of mine
01:03:42
unexpectedly becomes a support for me
01:03:46
thanks to which I, as an
01:03:50
adult, believe in some miracles and fairy tales,
01:03:52
especially you know when I dream about my
01:03:54
nightmare My most hated nightmare
01:03:56
the last 20 years is much worse than
01:03:58
falling into the open the sea or searching for a car,
01:04:02
as you know, I
01:04:04
wake up in a dream. You know, there is such a
01:04:06
treacherous feeling, you wake up in a dream, I
01:04:09
go to the kitchen and see that my mother is there
01:04:12
making dumplings. I say Mommy, what are you
01:04:15
doing here? She says, well, they let me go to
01:04:17
you, I mean. they let me go
01:04:20
from there they never let anyone go Well,
01:04:23
they let me go and you Well, they won’t
01:04:26
take her back from us like 20 years
01:04:31
ago Well, they promised that
01:04:34
they wouldn’t take her away. I sit down
01:04:37
next to you and say, Mom. Can you imagine every
01:04:40
time I took off? Well, on the plane I spoke
01:04:42
with God’s help to with my mother’s support, my
01:04:45
mother laughs. I take her hand and say,
01:04:47
Mom, you can now consider me an
01:04:50
idiot in the yard, even if they think I’m an idiot,
01:04:52
but now I’ll never let you out of my hand.
01:04:54
It’s clear, I’ll walk with you everywhere.
01:04:57
Let that be enough. Mother has already walked away
01:05:00
from us for 5 minutes and She and I go out into
01:05:02
the neighborhood and I shout to everyone Save look guys
01:05:04
look I also have a mother I’m
01:05:06
not an envious nit now it’s clear I don’t
01:05:08
care about your success I have a mom and my
01:05:10
mom laughs And I think God what a
01:05:13
forgotten luxury it is to tell someone Yes,
01:05:17
mom, and get an answer, and then I wake up,
01:05:21
I understand that it was a dream again, that my
01:05:23
psyche has set me up again, of course
01:05:25
I get upset. But here,
01:05:27
that
01:05:29
same inner child, you know, that
01:05:31
little boy who
01:05:32
quietly speaks to me at such moments, comes to my aid. somewhere says Don’t
01:05:36
worry, she’s
01:05:45
watching you Our session is over Thank you for
01:05:48
listening Goodbye
01:06:03
[applause]
01:06:19
[music]
01:06:23
C on candles they cry for
01:06:26
people, sometimes they cry softer, sometimes they cry
01:06:30
harder and they can’t forget Magic days,
01:06:35
candles and it’s very
01:06:39
important to
01:06:41
me that they don’t the wax of fire is afraid because of you
01:06:48
because of me The burning candles are crying and it is very
01:06:54
important for me that the wax of fire is not afraid
01:07:01
because of you and for me The
01:07:06
burning candles are crying
01:07:10
[music]
01:07:34
CH

Description:

Концерт снят в апреле 2021 года в Нижнем Новгороде. www.iabramov.ru

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  • The browser/computer should not freeze completely! If this happens, please report it with a link to the video. Sometimes videos cannot be downloaded directly in a suitable format, so we have added the ability to convert the file to the desired format. In some cases, this process may actively use computer resources.

mobile menu iconHow can I download "Иван Абрамов "БОЛЬШОЙ РЕБЁНОК" 2021" video to my phone?mobile menu icon

  • You can download a video to your smartphone using the website or the PWA application UDL Lite. It is also possible to send a download link via QR code using the UDL Helper extension.

mobile menu iconHow can I download an audio track (music) to MP3 "Иван Абрамов "БОЛЬШОЙ РЕБЁНОК" 2021"?mobile menu icon

  • The most convenient way is to use the UDL Client program, which supports converting video to MP3 format. In some cases, MP3 can also be downloaded through the UDL Helper extension.

mobile menu iconHow can I save a frame from a video "Иван Абрамов "БОЛЬШОЙ РЕБЁНОК" 2021"?mobile menu icon

  • This feature is available in the UDL Helper extension. Make sure that "Show the video snapshot button" is checked in the settings. A camera icon should appear in the lower right corner of the player to the left of the "Settings" icon. When you click on it, the current frame from the video will be saved to your computer in JPEG format.

mobile menu iconWhat's the price of all this stuff?mobile menu icon

  • It costs nothing. Our services are absolutely free for all users. There are no PRO subscriptions, no restrictions on the number or maximum length of downloaded videos.