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karina bacchi

kelly oliveira

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[Music]

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begins another parallel conversation your

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favorite podcast from Brazil parallel

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I'm here once again tonight

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like my dear wonderful friend like

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me who is here by my side

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Arthur

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that little guy from the podcast

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is the guy, not the affection It's the

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affectionate way of saying that you, the guy from the

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podcast Bom Demais Give it to you again,

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dear,

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it's a great pleasure and now, right, let's

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introduce our wonderful illustrious guests

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so we can chat

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about family, children, raising

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children and all that right, this subject

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that allows your life and we are

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here with Karina Bacchi who is the mother of

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Enrico the most beautiful baby in the history of

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humanity what a cutest baby baby

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who is already big

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exactly Oh but it's always a baby, right No,

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I look at him that way Pink cheeks

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look what a beautiful thing he has a

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really cute face and the

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host of the podcast

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is positively welcome Karina, thank you, I'm

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really looking forward to our chat here,

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this is a topic that I tend to talk about

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a lot on my social networks too

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And let me worry, I think it's super

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important, we're commenting here

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today, thank you for the invitation Oh, it's an

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honor and we're also with Dr.

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Kelly Oliveira, who is a

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pediatric sleep and breastfeeding consultant, right, Dr. Kelly,

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and manages a social network there.

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very useful which is the arroba

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Uncomplicated Pediatrics welcome Doctor thank you

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very much And also mother of two

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girls mother of two girls yes in fact I

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even have their names here oh Sara and

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Ester

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how I forgot the main thing my God I

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had to having opened with this, right,

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welcome, what a pleasure to welcome you here, it was

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a great joy,

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Karina, to start with you, let's go, we're

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going to talk about family today, about

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raising children, etc., and so on, if a

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person kind of fell here by parachute,

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it's that person you see, sometimes you turn on

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the television and turn it off, you see some gossip, another

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piece of gossip there and doesn't follow you closely and

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a lot of people follow you very closely,

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right, your Instagram today has almost 10

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million followers, right, something like that

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is a Karina clan wonderful brand that I

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really love, brand Brasil Parallel and we

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tag me and tag you there, idiot, please

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look here, there are very few haters, you see

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with the minimum voice there, look, but

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also the subjects you address there, right,

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they are wonderful, necessary,

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but if one person who is not part

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of those 10 million followers and

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parachutes here the person is like this

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Karina will talk about oh wait

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because how many people remember

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moments

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like this in your career which is

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already a long career with many participations for

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example me I remember you winning the

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farm, right, and everyone there in the crowd,

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that thing, your crying of emotion

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It was a scene that really impacted me there,

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I remember you doing some

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soap operas, some roles, including a role

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that was perhaps the most memorable was

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that one kind of like Betty the Ugly, who then turns

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into Betty the beautiful, as is right at the

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time, what was her name and she

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was my last soap opera I did, right,

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it was Mutantes This was the last soap opera

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I did, but I think one of the ones that

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people remember people from the

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old ones, right? Because a long time ago it was Da Cor

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do Pecado that I played Tina, who was from

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that sardine family who were

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fighters, it's a song Yes, yes, look, so

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you can see how the memory of each one

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I remember more on the other hand, how funny

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that role really made an impression on me because you

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must be younger

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89

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for a little bit

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90 I was still in the 80s, you know, at the

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end, a

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program presenter So you've already

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presented some programs and

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so always performed very well,

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apart from the fact that you were once a model You've already done it

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and it's always very beautiful like that, so we've

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always seen

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you explore this side, don't explore it, right,

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but it being there, beautiful and wonderful, gives you

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sensuality.

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that I have regretted most in my life

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but it is part of my exact trajectory

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and today if we go on your

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social networks we see you a woman of

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God a converted woman who talks

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about the Bible with mature knowledge

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that does not deny all of this, no are ashamed

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to talk about these things, on the contrary, you

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see them as a part of the trajectory.

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I would like you to comment with us

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for these people who fell here,

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what happened from that Karina Bacchi

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to this Carina Bacchi, we are

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seeing here today, seeing these

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social networks doing success for other

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reasons, now look, I say that that

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Karina that people only knew from the

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media and TV, that was already just a part

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of me, right, so there was already another

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Karina who was Carina, family, Carina

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who also had her values,

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but people got to know this a

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little further from the

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moment I stopped doing soap operas

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and participated in some reality shows and

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went to work as a presenter where I

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could show a little of my

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personality, outside of the roles that

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I played. and throughout my

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life like this and now more recently

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what changed was actually my

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conversion which will be a year and a half

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since I have been converted and it was

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not that I didn't believe in God I

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always had my belief I

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was always faithful to her, but I didn't

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understand what it was to serve God, I just

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wanted to be served and I sought it in

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moments

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when I thought I alone wouldn't be able to

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cope, not as a rebellion but as

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not wanting to give God work but I

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won't giving work has already given me my life,

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he already gives me everything now my job is to

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do my part so I'm going to do everything

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But I didn't seek understanding in the

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Bible, I didn't seek depth, right, I didn't

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attend church The services So

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I had a wrong understanding I I had

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Faith, I was faithful, but I exercised it in an

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eonic way, right? And when I went through

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this moment that I sought, you know,

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profoundly, my father was

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invited to the ICU for 10 days and I sought

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In prayer, I said, well, I have everything, I

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do the things. things

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at home we don't lack anything We are a

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united family we are in solidarity with our

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neighbor God what is missing and I

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felt an emptiness an impotence that I

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had never felt I thought I

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could that story it all depends on

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us we we can do it and

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it happens and everything had happened like this

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in my life but I didn't put the

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merit in God, I put it in myself

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I said I can do it God gives me the

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opportunity but I run after it I

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can do it and I believe today that we

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can do it getting to different places that

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we want, but if that place is not the

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place that God separated for us, that

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is not a victory, so I thought I

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could achieve victories and I did, I

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got to where I wanted to be, because it is, it

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is, but I felt Happy there I

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wasn't complete I thought I was out of

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my place I said hell but I

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conquered I wanted what's wrong

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I didn't cheat on anyone I

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did things correctly I wanted the

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good in people I helped and then I I

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searched for this at that moment when I

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felt helpless, right? I searched for this

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answer, I said, God shows me and I

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searched through the Bible alone,

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everything was closed, the churches were closed, the houses

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of the pandemic, someone who inspired you was

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you, it was me kneeling down, I say that

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I discovered the question of the password in

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Action in a small square on the carpet, locked

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in a room and searching and crying and reading

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the Bible and God revealed himself in a

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very beautiful way to me, in terms of

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understanding the word and it was very

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strong, very deep, to the point A

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month later I changed my life

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completely, so people even

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visibly didn't feel ashamed to talk about

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how I'm going to stop talking about something that

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is what completes me, which is what gives me

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peace, which is what transforms me because it

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lifts me up How am I going to stop saying

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this and some people don't, but I tried

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to use it a little, keep doing what

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you did so as not to scare people,

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lose customers, you're going to lose this, you're going to lose

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that, you're going to lose servers,

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people are Wow, now she's

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right. God, it's too boring, this content is

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too boring, I won't be able to do it. Am

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I a fanatic? I

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wasn't complete, that was

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moving away, but what was completing me doesn't move away, it doesn't move

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away from this connection, it never moves away, it's

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only if we allow it, so I did

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n't have that importance, I

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would in no way be ashamed to say something

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that it transforms me because I know that this

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can transform other people's lives

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too, as I already have, I talk about the

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followers that I lost. In the beginning, I already

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gained 10 times more, and then, you know, there are a

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lot of people here who are thirsty for that, right? And even the

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amount that I was losing there

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visibly in Direct I was winning

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souls, people saying I was going to do this

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thing and I didn't do it opened my eyes I

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was leaving I was in depression I

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can't speak again you said a

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prayer I am I came here today today you did

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n't I want to hear you, your voice

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gives me peace I need to hear you I speak to

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people with my voice the way I speak just from

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this love that I'm feeling I can

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give peace to someone and that made

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me want to talk but then that's

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how things took

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shape, right?

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God of

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Miracles, what a

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beautiful thing happens, I left home

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with just that good feeling, the next time

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they called me, look, presenter, he asked

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to go out, we thought of you,

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you accept, I said, I felt that

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Extra like that, but at the same time I was

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very afraid because I have a

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great zeal to talk about God, I did

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n't want to talk about something without having

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knowledge and the first thing I

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ask for guidance is the word of

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God and he communicates with me in a

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very beautiful way he said Look, just talk

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about this love that you feel, don't want to

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show that you know something that you don't

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yet know, that everything you will

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learn, everything will be revealed and I went

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there and I'm still there today as an apprentice

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so I'm there to listen to have a

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exchange with people who have authority

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who know much more than me who

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are already on this path so I don't

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hide what I don't want to seem like I

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don't want to seem like what I'm not,

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right Karina, you know that before just to

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stretch myself a little more here we're

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going to talk about other topics and such but I

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don't want to miss the opportunity to say

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this because I'm afraid it won't fit in

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at another time. At another point in the

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podcast it seems like it was a

00:12:12

very sudden thing like that but it's so

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funny I I

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unpretentiously went to see some of

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your old conversations on YouTube like this

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and I saw your interview in 2015 with

00:12:23

Danilo Gentili and it's so funny

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Gustavo corsão who is a

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Brazilian writer has a line he has a

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wonderful line he says like

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human beings We have, as if they were an

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antenna, an antenna that is always

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groping for something that many

00:12:41

people spend their lives without discovering

00:12:42

what it is, but this antenna is God, right?

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So we are always groping and we know

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that this antenna is complete

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somewhere. and there in 2015 I saw you, you got there, strong,

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I was working out, Danilo Gentil,

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he plays with you, he exercises together

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there, we use it as a weight, And then

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you said that you weren't thinking, son, right

00:13:04

at that time, and everything else, and

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you were moving with dog clothes

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and it's so funny Karina there I swear

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to you the feeling I had as

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a person who didn't even know this whole

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story After I went after it was

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a person who had these little antennas

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that you said I'm here I I arrived,

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I have my blog, Fitness, it's having

00:13:24

great success and so on, but there's uncle here, there's

00:13:27

uncle there and then soon after he came, right? At

00:13:42

the farm

00:13:45

I took, we could only take one book

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each, right? At the time afterwards I couldn't even

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take any more, but at the time I went and I

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took a

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tiny Bible of that size that today

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I can't even see a single letter in it of that

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size because I didn't want to do it.

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a flag and no one even knew that

00:14:04

I had taken it, I read it. Then everyone

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slept under the duvet with a little

00:14:08

light and that, if you see in the final of the

00:14:12

program, when I won, I had

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that little Bible and I wasn't

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converted, I just I was looking for God and

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I said I'm not going to have my

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family, I'm not going to have anyone to talk to,

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I want you to direct me and in the

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end I say thank you God I'm with

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that little bundle that was a nice little baby

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and he already communicated

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with me I asked Sir, can I

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trust this person then like the guy

00:14:37

was cooking he said this because nothing

00:14:38

comes out of this cauldron I don't know I don't

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know it's poison I don't know who was talking I

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understand

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it was like that and my conversations with God are

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like that girl oh I was nice I I open

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something and say, oh, I understand that,

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I understand,

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but it is something that also says that it is

00:14:57

God that we seek But God is

00:15:01

constantly seeking us,

00:15:03

but I looked for it in situations like this, only then,

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now here I will need him, so

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I just don't I knew that every day

00:15:11

we need it and when we have

00:15:13

this little ear sensitive to the

00:15:16

Holy Spirit, it's Jesus every day, oh things

00:15:19

flow much better, right, and Doctor Kelly, we have the

00:15:22

little antennas that she said, right, the

00:15:24

Bible itself says that, right, that God put

00:15:26

eternity in the heart of man so

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this is the eternity that was in the heart

00:15:36

I would like to know a little more now

00:15:38

getting more into your area of Pediatrics and

00:15:41

so on, we see a lot on your

00:15:42

Instagram of you helping fathers, mothers there and

00:15:45

overcoming these challenges, right? of early

00:15:47

childhood is the whole issue of breastfeeding,

00:15:50

weaning, you know, of

00:15:53

Child Development and so on, I have a daughter who has just

00:15:56

turned one year old, now I went through a

00:15:58

process,

00:16:01

some things, we are going to see that,

00:16:03

empirically testing, it seems that

00:16:06

it worked here, we gave me a

00:16:07

We're also taking a lot of things

00:16:10

and it's incredible, you know, when you see the mother

00:16:13

and father there, especially the mother, those

00:16:15

maternal instincts. It seems like there were

00:16:17

some things that I looked at, I don't know, at

00:16:19

Alana, she caught Joana doing two

00:16:20

little things like that. like it seems like she

00:16:23

found a way like that, you know, I'm not

00:16:26

incredible and I wanted to understand a little

00:16:28

more about the acting towel, if you can

00:16:30

explain it like that because it's a universe, you know,

00:16:34

gigantic What's up with

00:16:36

Pediatrics?

00:16:39

Pediatrics is important today, I see

00:16:41

pediatrics as much more than just

00:16:43

taking care of the disease or Oh, go there, it hurts

00:16:47

or something happened with a fever, go

00:16:49

there and take care of it or go to the pediatrician, right?

00:16:51

So, my vision of seeing

00:16:54

Pediatrics was always seeing the family, right?

00:16:58

So when the mother goes there when the father

00:16:59

goes there, it's really cool because we can

00:17:01

have this dialogue,

00:17:03

talk about raising children, they

00:17:05

ask about

00:17:07

what to do about sleep, so

00:17:09

we, the pediatrician, I say it's an

00:17:12

opportunity. huge because we have

00:17:14

this monitoring, right from the time the

00:17:18

baby is born until before, right? Many times the

00:17:20

parents go to the prenatal consultation beforehand

00:17:22

And then you can follow it month

00:17:25

by month, especially in the first year when

00:17:26

the consultations are closer together But I

00:17:29

I see pediatrics as much more than

00:17:32

disease care, right?

00:17:50

teachings and they really, right, the

00:17:53

family sees you as this figure, right, so

00:17:56

the mother had a patient until recently who

00:17:59

went to the office and then she had several

00:18:02

family issues, you know, difficulties with her

00:18:05

husband, well, her husband wasn't there, so she

00:18:07

managed to open up more about

00:18:08

it, I said. I don't already understand this

00:18:10

consultation is for you then I said several

00:18:13

things anyway, cry and cry a lot and

00:18:17

vent And hug now you can hug it's

00:18:21

so good to be able to hug and it's this eye to

00:18:25

eye like that something

00:18:26

transcends the care of the child you know

00:18:28

it's you look at that child, but in my

00:18:31

opinion, you take care of this family, you

00:18:34

accompany this child who will be the

00:18:36

human being, right, who will be

00:18:47

the future, right? of humanity

00:18:52

I think I'm not funny like that

00:18:54

because There was a time when I even started

00:18:56

to question myself I said I think I'm

00:18:58

no longer old enough

00:19:02

it's like the pink one from the pediatrician's friends

00:19:06

with a lollipop Hahaha But it's

00:19:09

an exchange and it's a lot good and you Doctor

00:19:13

Kelly have a very broad view

00:19:16

of this because you have the

00:19:18

professional academic version of those who studied and

00:19:21

who sees this in the office with

00:19:23

clinical eyes but you have an office a

00:19:26

practical laboratory in your house which are

00:19:28

your two daughters, right And in this context I

00:19:31

would like to know about you and Karina also

00:19:33

in this current context in which we live in the

00:19:36

21st century with the internet with these

00:19:39

ideological issues that we come to

00:19:41

even like this, right BP select because there

00:19:43

you are free from theologies and always

00:19:45

Press Play without fear but in this

00:19:47

context, what do you perceive to be the

00:19:51

biggest concerns in raising a

00:19:54

child?

00:20:05

theirs is

00:20:08

precisely how to create, right? These

00:20:11

people in this circumstance that we

00:20:13

are in, so the world that has a lot of

00:20:17

information, the internet,

00:20:19

others, is a bombardment, right?

00:20:24

It's there

00:20:27

that the mother suddenly arrived, you know, she no

00:20:31

longer has that old experience that she used to

00:20:33

have, Ah, there was another child there,

00:20:36

she took care of it and everyone was together, there was a

00:20:38

grandmother, there was an aunt, so there was always that woman,

00:20:41

mainly the woman, right, but she

00:20:44

had an experience with child

00:20:47

before having a child and women are

00:20:50

having children later too so there is

00:20:53

the issue of career, right, many things

00:20:54

that come to the fore many times before and then

00:20:57

suddenly the child arrives and has never

00:21:00

held a baby, never held a baby, does

00:21:02

n't even speak How is that, wait, calm down,

00:21:03

considering that what I do is, you know, I

00:21:06

get very lost at the same time

00:21:08

and the internet, social networks, right? It's a

00:21:11

place that has a lot of things, right? A lot of

00:21:14

information, but I see that today mothers and

00:21:16

fathers are a little lost in the middle of

00:21:19

this information there's a lot of things there's a

00:21:21

lot of good things but there's a lot of bad things

00:21:23

and then you put it on the internet and do some

00:21:26

research and suddenly you say like

00:21:28

fever here it comes Okay, right, even more

00:21:32

despair than relief so it was in that

00:21:35

environment until I also found on

00:21:38

social media a way to bring

00:21:39

education, bring knowledge to

00:21:42

people, right, and I see that

00:21:45

this area of education, also raising

00:21:49

children, is challenging,

00:21:51

the beginning, right, the first months, also the

00:21:54

issue of the postpartum period, the baby has arrived and

00:21:57

now the Women need to have this division

00:22:01

of roles, the

00:22:03

hormonal issue and purperium, which is not

00:22:07

just the 40 days that the doctor says 40

00:22:10

days ago or thereabouts, it cannot last longer,

00:22:12

the woman is also very alone

00:22:15

at the same time as there are a lot of people

00:22:17

sometimes a lot of information the woman is

00:22:18

more alone at home

00:22:21

what to do so

00:22:24

breastfeeding is also a first challenge

00:22:26

then pain difficulty

00:22:28

I myself am an expert in this area

00:22:31

of breastfeeding I have

00:22:33

everything international but I found myself in this role of mother with

00:22:37

a lot of pain a lot of difficulty my

00:22:39

first daughter had several issues

00:22:42

like breastfeeding, I knew what it was

00:22:44

but at the same time it didn't take away from

00:22:46

what I felt, I spent two months

00:22:48

feeling pain, all the problems

00:22:50

you imagine with breastfeeding and I'm

00:22:54

sure that was also a problem. part of

00:22:55

my experience

00:22:57

that I needed to go through so I could have

00:23:00

more empathy so I could pass this on to

00:23:03

mothers and the challenges go on over time. I

00:23:06

say it goes like it's a

00:23:11

video game phase, right?

00:23:13

the next phase,

00:23:15

which is more difficult or not, right, there's the

00:23:19

boss, you mentioned video games, with the

00:23:22

situation I always joke about this because,

00:23:24

of course, there are exactly these phases, there's

00:23:28

Dentinho's phase, and there's the colic phase that you

00:23:31

have to put on to burp the issue. of

00:23:33

sleep, which is now better because before it

00:23:35

was difficult, right?

00:23:37

The issue of sleep deprivation too And

00:23:40

then it's combined with hormones, along with

00:23:42

it, with work, a lot of things,

00:23:44

but you mentioned video games, I

00:23:46

remembered that like this, watching my

00:23:48

daughter And so on, sometimes out of nowhere, I don't know,

00:23:50

two days passed, she learned to

00:23:52

crawl on her own, then, I don't know, a

00:23:55

week passes, she's already trying to get up, man, she

00:23:57

does something, it's out of the blue, like she

00:24:00

downloaded a piece of software, right,

00:24:02

updated a program

00:24:10

before, she didn't know how to put it in, I know. there little

00:24:13

ball inside the box from the

00:24:14

toy thing today even on video so

00:24:17

I already get it and put it in the right place

00:24:18

so no one taught her anything so

00:24:20

she was we stimulated it Of course

00:24:22

but it's crazy how you learn, right

00:24:25

from nature there if you go seeing a

00:24:27

little baby born who is

00:24:30

completely dependent on you, doesn't know how to

00:24:33

feed himself, doesn't know how to change his

00:24:34

bath alone, nothing, he's very fragile,

00:24:38

another baby spent a year, he's already learned

00:24:42

thousands of things, right, patience says

00:24:45

that a baby in the first years of life,

00:24:48

especially the first half days,

00:24:50

I don't know if you've heard this term,

00:24:51

the first thousand days of life, today they say

00:24:54

1100 days, it accompanies pregnancy, but the

00:24:58

first two years of the child's life and

00:25:00

early childhood are the

00:25:01

first six years, the first years of pregnancy

00:25:04

as well the 1100 or 100 days would be the

00:25:06

first three months before this woman

00:25:08

conceives, right, she will prepare to have

00:25:11

a child, they are very important, they talk about 700

00:25:14

to a thousand brain connections per second

00:25:18

of a child, so a lot of things

00:25:21

you can imagine what a child learns

00:25:24

in the first years of life is what

00:25:26

perhaps an adult will never learn but

00:25:27

in life you know the amount of information

00:25:30

and those jumps

00:25:34

then I didn't sleep Help I know because it

00:25:37

seems like I learned to see better

00:25:39

then that's it I don't want to sleep

00:25:41

inside the bag then we learn, right?

00:25:43

In the beginning,

00:25:47

and you, Karina, what do you see as the

00:25:50

biggest challenges? Look, I think

00:25:52

the biggest challenge

00:25:53

is the inventions of values that we

00:25:57

have lived, right? The issue of

00:26:01

freedom of expression

00:26:04

as a freedom to

00:26:09

be showing what is wrong with a

00:26:13

semblance of right at the same time, so what about

00:26:15

the internet, right? Nowadays, with

00:26:19

people having access to everything, they are left

00:26:23

without a basis to compare, they do

00:26:26

n't know where to

00:26:28

put it there, without any reference, without

00:26:31

any reference, without know what's

00:26:33

right and what's wrong at the same time

00:26:35

they want to educate their child They don't

00:26:37

want to deprive them of anything because Ah, it's

00:26:40

wrong for you to deprive it's wrong for you, so

00:26:43

it almost became wrong for you to give them

00:26:46

direction, you teach them, so in a little while

00:26:49

even the teacher will be wrong because he

00:26:51

teaches

00:26:53

the pediatrician will be wrong because she

00:26:56

is directing so if you leave

00:26:58

everything free then everything being right the person does

00:27:02

n't know where to hold

00:27:07

it it is very complicated and with this

00:27:11

information totally distorted

00:27:14

because this is not only on social media

00:27:18

where everyone speaks for themselves but also in the

00:27:20

media where everyone seeks their own

00:27:22

interests and does not look for what will give what

00:27:26

will be best for that family

00:27:28

what is in the long term will generate, you know, something good

00:27:31

in that child they want let it

00:27:35

please the person momentarily please

00:27:38

everyone momentarily causing

00:27:40

mental confusion and everyone in the father and

00:27:43

mother in the child who thinks it's wrong what they

00:27:46

're doing they see the other doing I think

00:27:47

this one doesn't know where to stand and

00:27:50

things go principles and values, yes,

00:27:53

so everything is disorganized, right,

00:27:56

they are commenting, my daughter is one year old,

00:27:59

sometimes she sees like I want to get into the

00:28:01

issue of Screens, including

00:28:05

But the issue of the internet before, right, she doesn't

00:28:09

get on the internet, she doesn't research anything, she doesn't

00:28:11

have the capacity yet because she has

00:28:13

a year old but it's how to deal with this

00:28:16

lawless land that is the internet having

00:28:18

children nowadays Remembering that the

00:28:21

adult has the capacity, right the capacity

00:28:23

that the teenager that the child that the

00:28:25

baby doesn't have yet so he has to be

00:28:28

responsible he has to To be responsible,

00:28:30

he has to know, he has to research, he has to

00:28:33

see what the son is watching

00:28:34

that the daughter is watching, in what way the

00:28:37

son and daughter are exposing themselves and they have

00:28:39

to set rules like that, they have to

00:28:42

set limits, yes, it is not there is no point

00:28:45

because you have to teach him that

00:28:49

he can learn to make choices but

00:28:51

there will be consequences for them to make

00:28:53

choices. Every choice we make

00:28:55

has a consequence and the

00:28:57

problem is that people just want to

00:28:59

say, not impose In a way, no one

00:29:02

wants it like that, nor do we, as adults, want to

00:29:04

explain it Without explaining it, you have to

00:29:06

go back or not, because look, why, why, why,

00:29:09

because there are bad things, things

00:29:10

that won't do

00:29:13

everything, he has more, I think, wisdom

00:29:16

than many adults. It's impressive he

00:29:18

talks like this he understands perfectly

00:29:20

because because I don't talk about this look he

00:29:23

says can mom talk look this one

00:29:26

can't you know you can but

00:29:28

what happens son that's not that

00:29:31

something will happen if you do there is

00:29:34

this consequence there I can jump

00:29:36

here but I'm not afraid I said son

00:29:39

you're not afraid but you're also

00:29:41

smart I know you're not afraid

00:29:43

but you'd like to fall if you break in

00:29:46

one piece so I'll put it

00:29:49

Sometimes we're not afraid of falling apart

00:29:52

to expose but look at the consequence teaching

00:29:54

to think teaching to think to reason

00:29:57

so Enrico is very funny

00:29:59

because I say he's not even five

00:30:00

years old and there's no point in arguing with

00:30:03

little things like that Rasa he says no oh

00:30:06

but mom can't because she's with you

00:30:08

need to go to that place, no, mom

00:30:10

But if you go to another place, he

00:30:12

argues, he argues, I said

00:30:16

so, it's also very cool because I don't

00:30:18

lie to him, not even little things

00:30:19

or nonsense, I don't say son, don't go

00:30:22

there, there are animals there. I tell you the truth,

00:30:24

son, don't go there because you're going to have a baby,

00:30:26

it'll give you a shock if you get a

00:30:28

shock we have to go to the

00:30:29

hospital So don't keep inventing

00:30:31

fables in his head, you know, even though

00:30:33

he's a child Because the more

00:30:36

truth we put Sometimes there are

00:30:39

things you can't say in

00:30:40

such a Rude way but I never lied I always

00:30:43

put this is one of the main values

00:30:45

right and I think he accepts it much

00:30:48

better right Much better much better you know

00:30:50

and we what happens We have

00:30:53

seen many parents themselves

00:30:55

emotionally unbalanced and

00:30:57

putting this on their

00:31:01

children and then saying oh my son is

00:31:03

disobedient, my son I don't know what,

00:31:04

but we as adults are the ones who have to have

00:31:07

control, we have control over ourselves as

00:31:09

agents. of emotional control, I talk about

00:31:11

this first year, which is the most difficult,

00:31:13

so it's

00:31:15

more challenging, especially in the

00:31:17

first child, as everything is new, everything

00:31:19

you think is strange, Cristal. So

00:31:23

we have to have

00:31:25

Patience, we have to look at breathing 20

00:31:29

times because everything was already a

00:31:30

consequence in that child so my

00:31:33

son was very wanted my son he

00:31:35

was always very expected he is very

00:31:40

loved So even though I was

00:31:43

sleepless I was tired and sometimes I

00:31:46

felt like not doing such a thing I

00:31:48

breathed and said no to him If I do it

00:31:50

this way up front he will feel

00:31:53

everything so I will hold on I'm an

00:31:56

adult in the house and today I see the fruits

00:31:58

of this you know I never shouted at my son

00:32:01

maybe I shouted and said something like this Son

00:32:03

you will fall but never scream never to give

00:32:05

an order like that and today I see the

00:32:09

sweetness of the boy that he is loving and

00:32:11

understanding he wants to help with everything

00:32:13

so that's how I see it you see the

00:32:16

fruits every six months that you

00:32:18

planted you see it there or see it the

00:32:20

following week So it's worth it It's worth it for us

00:32:22

to master sometimes our lack of

00:32:25

patience, our anger, our stress

00:32:27

because that will generate Good Fruit

00:32:30

in that child in that teenager and

00:32:33

then we work on it, right, we

00:32:34

swallow it and we work on that

00:32:36

within ourselves because otherwise we would also At some

00:32:38

point we explode in another area, right,

00:32:40

but understanding our role as parents

00:32:44

as well as mothers, understanding that this is

00:32:47

a gift, we are, right, you said,

00:32:50

God's portals to the earth, we are there with a

00:32:53

great opportunity for growth,

00:32:55

everything is so beautiful. you generate a life

00:32:57

so we just the inversion of

00:32:59

values makes us think that

00:33:01

then there's no problem I have that now

00:33:02

it's my job in the first place and the

00:33:05

son is there that's it people it's a life

00:33:07

it's a being human

00:33:09

This is the priority if you decide to have a

00:33:12

child This is the priority This is the

00:33:15

priority is the child and the family the rest

00:33:17

is what has to fit in, it is not the child who

00:33:18

has to fit into our routine

00:33:20

perfectly and even the Doctor that

00:33:25

Professor Olavo has One thing I

00:33:26

think is that I don't have children, right? So I

00:33:28

take the experience of others and

00:33:30

then the teachings of others, he talks about, for

00:33:32

example, what Karina is

00:33:34

talking about shouting and hitting, he says this to his

00:33:36

son and I want to know if This comes

00:33:40

from the Clinical point of view, there you learn

00:33:41

by example of what you do, right? So

00:33:45

he says that if you yell at your

00:33:48

child, hit the child, even if you

00:33:50

are saying the right thing, he will

00:33:52

learn to scream and hit him, so he will

00:33:55

learn from your For example, you notice

00:33:56

this in these methods of creation Ah, of

00:34:00

course, the example is much

00:34:03

stronger, right? The example is that he screams,

00:34:06

literally, so

00:34:08

and the other child, he notices this lack

00:34:10

of often being compliant, right, because

00:34:12

the mother, the father, is sometimes shouting. there, or

00:34:16

sometimes even in the context of the family,

00:34:18

family dynamics are a little complicated

00:34:20

and sometimes the child sees things that

00:34:22

unfortunately perhaps they shouldn't see And then

00:34:25

they end up Having this as a model now, that's why it's

00:34:29

so important to have a home

00:34:31

that has principles values that

00:34:35

teach but much more by

00:34:37

example and even what I have also

00:34:40

said a lot, I have been very vocal about

00:34:43

having quality time with your

00:34:47

children, right? So there is a term

00:34:51

called distracted parenting, I don't know if

00:34:53

you've heard of it but It's this madness

00:34:56

that we live in today, it's in airplane mode,

00:35:00

but the pandemic also took a

00:35:03

toll because people were at home

00:35:06

in the Home Office but they had to be there, the

00:35:08

boss is asking for a report, I

00:35:11

don't know how long it's WhatsApp that keeps

00:35:14

ringing for so long Sometimes

00:35:16

you're on your cell phone but you're also

00:35:17

watching business and then the cell phone is always in

00:35:21

our hand, right, almost like an extension of

00:35:23

our body, right?

00:35:28

so you're here paying attention

00:35:31

I don't know what and then suddenly you

00:35:32

're not looking at him anymore you're already talking

00:35:34

to your boss who's calling here and that's

00:35:37

ok It's almost impossible, right? Many

00:35:39

times for us to stay 100% there, it would be

00:35:42

impossible to we always stay because

00:35:43

we have our work we have

00:35:44

other things but the time you

00:35:47

dedicate to your child and I say that

00:35:49

sometimes it doesn't need to be that long, it

00:35:50

's an hour 30 minutes but 100% being

00:35:55

there in body and soul without a cell phone like that and

00:35:58

I had some very

00:36:00

sincere conversations with even patients saying, look, you

00:36:03

need to do this, this is what your

00:36:06

son needs, quality time,

00:36:08

quantity of garlic, right, and I see myself in this

00:36:11

role too, how often does he work

00:36:13

with the network? social Karina So we have

00:36:16

Oh we have to do a Stories I don't know

00:36:18

what you say no now I'm going to stay

00:36:20

here with my daughter so much so that

00:36:22

sometimes I see I'm doing something

00:36:23

on my cell phone my daughter picks it up she does

00:36:25

n't even take it I don't want to be mad it's you

00:36:28

She wants she wants me she wants and so

00:36:30

they increasingly realize this they

00:36:32

know when we are 100%, yes they

00:36:35

know it's impressive like that I tell

00:36:38

my daughter a lot like daughter look

00:36:39

me in the eye So this thing of look

00:36:42

in my eye not just like bad things

00:36:44

because you say like that in my eye

00:36:46

like you're fighting no you say look in

00:36:49

my eye then she looks so cute

00:36:52

she said I love you I love you

00:36:55

she took it and said she repeats she says

00:36:58

like this mother mother mother mother look into my eyes

00:37:00

she I love you so

00:37:02

much so these little

00:37:05

things are very important and also

00:37:08

in relation to the issue of the internet and

00:37:11

saying that oh it's the world of the internet

00:37:13

this world I completely agree just

00:37:17

removing what Carina said here, which

00:37:18

is that there can be a lot of things on the

00:37:22

internet, you know, it's a big world that you

00:37:26

can't control, but whoever can

00:37:28

control it, parents can and parents

00:37:32

should, so don't

00:37:33

neglect it, don't neglect it, the

00:37:36

upbringing of your children. children because you can't

00:37:38

leave them at the mercy of the internet, you can't

00:37:40

leave them at the mercy of the internet without having

00:37:43

control without knowing what your children

00:37:45

are watching. I even want to

00:37:47

ask you Karina about how you

00:37:50

see this issue of today's creation

00:37:54

versus creation In the past, I have

00:37:57

the impression that we always think

00:38:00

that the past is better than it

00:38:03

really was, sometimes it was even

00:38:04

better than the present, but I think

00:38:06

we romanticize it a little, for example,

00:38:08

Oh no, because in my time there you will

00:38:09

see our time was the time of the

00:38:11

witch's aunt of the witch's aunt fantasies

00:38:12

for children like that, right?

00:38:20

vitamin S of

00:38:23

dirt How do you see this

00:38:26

creation, especially with the issue of

00:38:28

screens that Arthur was talking about just now?

00:38:30

How do you deal with this? Do you try to

00:38:32

rescue some things from

00:38:34

old creations? Look, I rescue everything because I

00:38:37

had a very dirty childhood. I'm

00:38:40

from the interior of São Paulo, I'm from São

00:38:42

Manuel, a city with 55 thousand inhabitants,

00:38:44

so I had this, I'm already 45

00:38:49

years old, it's been a long time, so in my

00:38:53

childhood I had a lot of contact with

00:38:55

nature, I had my parents, my

00:38:58

family who always preserved the

00:39:01

street games of hopscotch,

00:39:03

making doll clothes with scraps

00:39:06

and sewing, so I didn't have to

00:39:09

watch cartoons on television and

00:39:11

I started working as a model when I was

00:39:14

four years old because I was

00:39:16

already a resourcefulness in my city

00:39:18

my mother worked in fashion and I

00:39:20

modeled but at the same time I learned

00:39:22

to sew I played I threw parties for

00:39:25

dolls I had a very rich childhood

00:39:27

active very active very rich So

00:39:31

simple things simple things to

00:39:34

learn to do things with my hands and

00:39:36

not receiving all the toys ready

00:39:39

and it wasn't because Ah, I didn't lack

00:39:42

the conditions, it was because my family

00:39:44

wanted to give me these opportunities, they

00:39:48

worked hard for it, so I had a

00:39:51

childhood that gave me this,

00:39:53

but I know that many people at Sometimes you don't

00:39:55

have that at home and maybe there's no

00:39:56

way to rescue it from the past of your

00:40:00

own upbringing, but I eat my son

00:40:02

in the days since he was born. Anyway, I've

00:40:06

always

00:40:08

looked for this so much that I moved to

00:40:10

a house in a gated community in

00:40:13

São Paulo. Paulo, who didn't have a tree in

00:40:15

my house, I was pregnant, I said, I'm going to

00:40:17

plant a bunch of trees and he's going to

00:40:18

pick fruit from the tree, he's going to pick blackberries,

00:40:21

he's going to pick I don't know what, now there's

00:40:23

an Amazon tree there,

00:40:26

it's crowded, I swear, I'm having to uproot the tree.

00:40:29

tree that doesn't fit, but just seeing

00:40:32

him go there with the bucket collecting and

00:40:34

said Oh, that's good, I'm trying

00:40:35

to provide something that I had living in the

00:40:38

country, so I teach him things

00:40:40

about recycled crafts, I make

00:40:43

toys with my hands, I look for them in internet

00:40:45

I say that even during the pandemic I

00:40:48

started to share it because I saw that

00:40:50

people say oh, teach us more, I

00:40:52

don't know what to do, say look, you can

00:40:53

make a battery with a pan lid

00:40:55

with a wooden spoon with I don't know what

00:40:58

So I started teaching all of this and I would get

00:41:02

a little PET bottle. Like with the

00:41:05

clips, sometimes just to do a show

00:41:07

with Aline,

00:41:13

I would shake that thing, I thought it was

00:41:15

cardboard and everything, but that's what

00:41:18

happens, it takes up the time of the adult who

00:41:20

is there. to do this, you're ready, right,

00:41:22

people sometimes don't want to have that

00:41:24

time, you really don't have that

00:41:26

opportunity, right?

00:41:35

trying

00:41:37

to modify my work so that I

00:41:39

can spend more time with my son, I managed to

00:41:41

do that so I made the most of it

00:41:43

and I enjoy it so even in the moments when

00:41:47

I say that sometimes we all go and

00:41:49

watch a screen and watch a film

00:41:52

together, we prepare a drawing that

00:41:54

in a special way makes it kind of themed

00:41:57

there it's the Builder daughter so put on

00:41:59

your Builder outfit put on the

00:42:01

little hat where are your tools

00:42:03

you know so we and I have fun I

00:42:05

become a child I even like it

00:42:08

you really like it it's true and what a

00:42:12

crazy thing friend, I said, I like it, I become a

00:42:15

child at that moment with him, I

00:42:17

love doing this and I see his eyes

00:42:19

shine, I see, I say, mom, but our

00:42:22

cinema session will be what we have here, a

00:42:23

theme, you know, it's not to be free of him

00:42:27

at that moment,

00:42:29

some films, some videos that we

00:42:32

watch later, I look for it, for example, Oh, it's one

00:42:35

that will show more about

00:42:37

discovering things, so I talk about how

00:42:40

we can take what

00:42:43

you learned from this cartoon to

00:42:45

life over the weekend, because otherwise the children will become just

00:42:47

looking at the children discovering looking

00:42:51

at the drawing the other one having fun

00:42:53

Just passively

00:42:56

thinking that it's living there in

00:42:59

her little head and she doesn't have the

00:43:01

real experience So let's transform it into a

00:43:03

real experience you saw that so

00:43:05

today we're going to the park take yours

00:43:08

let's dig that place and go So

00:43:10

I make those visions that he

00:43:14

has there watching that he puts into

00:43:16

practice in some way even if he

00:43:18

has to travel within the

00:43:19

Condominium itself within the rooms of the

00:43:22

house but I transform that, you know, that

00:43:26

playful into something real for him to feel

00:43:28

that, but this is a very healthy use

00:43:30

of Screens, right, it is precisely

00:43:32

involving the adult in what is

00:43:35

happening, right, it is a purpose, right?

00:43:42

the adult or caregiver

00:43:44

and the child so super cool now he

00:43:48

's with us vitamin S vitamin and

00:43:51

I found it cheap Look she talked about

00:43:54

growing up in the countryside and I also grew up

00:43:56

in the countryside I have to say

00:43:58

my entire childhood I lived in a

00:44:01

city that It had 30,000 inhabitants, it was

00:44:05

called Jarinu, it's also the rural farm in

00:44:07

São Paulo and I lived on a

00:44:09

farm, you know, I lived there for 10 years on that

00:44:12

farm and I had to

00:44:14

pick fruit from the tree. It was a thing like

00:44:17

climbing a tree, so I remember I

00:44:19

had a tree. Amora and my mother were

00:44:23

three feet, right, because I have we are

00:44:24

three women, three sisters and then I climbed

00:44:28

on Amora's tree and I got all dirty, you

00:44:30

know what love is like, right, never again, never

00:44:33

again and my mother saw it like that, I

00:44:34

just did it. said wow Let's

00:44:36

play coloring

00:44:38

then I held my hand close to the purple Oh the

00:44:42

whole body and we ate blackberries who

00:44:44

remembered that we had to wash the mora

00:44:46

no one, right?

00:44:52

precisely we get

00:44:55

scared, right?

00:45:09

wanting, right, maybe to protect the child and

00:45:12

are afraid that they don't

00:45:15

have to clean it here and so on. It's logical when it's a

00:45:18

newborn, so let's talk, right,

00:45:20

common sense, when it's a newborn,

00:45:23

when the baby is a little baby, we take that

00:45:25

care, right? sterilize things, it's

00:45:28

clean, but when the child gets

00:45:31

a little older, up to six months old, they start

00:45:33

to eat, the child starts to crawl.

00:45:34

Then you'll start crawling around the

00:45:36

house, you can't do it every time you

00:45:39

pass a little, you pass the one

00:45:41

day it will be cracked, you know, and that's how it is,

00:45:45

people, so there's that too,

00:45:47

and vitamin n is nature, right, having

00:45:51

contact with external nature, so

00:45:54

in the sand, clay, modeling clay, paint,

00:45:58

right, so it's the child having this

00:46:00

experience, says that the child she will

00:46:03

experience the world she will taste

00:46:07

everything she will understand our tree

00:46:10

there is the trunk and wow it is kind of

00:46:13

rough like that and there is a little animal that climbs

00:46:15

Ah a little ant there there is a little leaf

00:46:18

that is different so every moment that

00:46:20

you are promoting in nature, you are

00:46:22

promoting a different experience

00:46:23

for children when we talk about

00:46:26

screens, right, we always have those

00:46:29

positions, they are a bit polarized, right, well

00:46:31

divided,

00:46:32

zero screen, you can't even know what screen

00:46:35

exists

00:46:39

and it already makes you uncomfortable, the child on the screen has

00:46:42

this vision and there is also that

00:46:45

vision of Ah, I can have a little bit

00:46:48

of such a schedule and then it is something

00:46:52

more controlled by the parents. I want to

00:46:54

understand how you see this

00:46:56

issue of Screens. What

00:46:58

did you do with your daughters?

00:47:00

a son with your daughter

00:47:02

just so we can understand a little

00:47:04

better, that can come on, let's go,

00:47:07

the screens It's logical that there is this

00:47:11

controversy, I think there are some things,

00:47:14

so I'm going to say that the medical part,

00:47:16

let's say the scientific part of it, is

00:47:19

so what question are the recommendations

00:47:20

then the recommendation of the American Academy

00:47:23

of Pediatrics Brazilian Society of

00:47:25

Pediatrics they advise that the screen, the

00:47:28

ideal would be to not have screens until two

00:47:30

years of age because the child is very

00:47:32

small anyway there would be no need to

00:47:35

have a television computer cell phone all

00:47:39

the screens, all the screens are zero screens,

00:47:43

with the exception, right, I'm going to make an exception

00:47:45

here where they talk about making video

00:47:46

calls to grandparents, right, relatives who

00:47:49

live far away because they might never see them

00:47:52

when they're very little,

00:47:54

I think they take this care, right, the

00:47:57

Brazilian Society of I would also ask for guidance like this,

00:47:59

it's logical that afterwards, always with a lot of

00:48:01

balance, as we were even

00:48:04

commenting here, Karina talked

00:48:07

about triangular So she

00:48:09

actively participates, then we're going to do a

00:48:11

popcorn session here, two years ago, I found

00:48:15

angulation, that's it after the two

00:48:18

mistakes, right? recommendations Of course, I

00:48:21

think it also comes into play,

00:48:25

well, he talked

00:48:28

about blue light, right?

00:48:35

screen it

00:48:38

emits a light that inhibits the production of the

00:48:42

sleep hormone melatonin So

00:48:44

there are even some screen resources today

00:48:47

that you can reduce the blue light

00:48:50

something a bit orange becomes more orange

00:48:52

this on the cell phone so I say like, oh man I

00:48:57

can't So I say that it's

00:49:00

my mother, sometimes she's alone, there are no

00:49:03

difficulties, but there's also that

00:49:05

thing Well, what choices am I

00:49:08

going to make, so the moments when

00:49:10

suddenly you're alone and you need to have some

00:49:12

waiting time there, right, and restrict it

00:49:16

in this case. at these moments and the

00:49:19

child doesn't stay there all day because what

00:49:21

happens I realize that there is also

00:49:23

a lack of balance so oh no but there

00:49:27

can't be a screen I don't know what then you

00:49:29

go to the other post right the child spends a

00:49:32

lot of time on that screen passive passing

00:49:35

things by passing the drawings you see

00:49:37

children on the cell phone which I consider even

00:49:40

worse because the child has their little finger

00:49:43

there they can click they can stay

00:49:45

as long as they want

00:49:47

and you see a lot of children passing by so there is

00:49:49

no more time to tolerate So

00:49:51

watch that one drawing 5 seconds 10

00:49:53

seconds Ah, I didn't like it Ah, I didn't like it,

00:49:56

move on to another one and then that causes anxiety

00:49:59

too

00:50:00

A lot of anxiety Look, I'll tell you, there

00:50:02

really were a lot of bigger issues that

00:50:04

increased during the period during the pandemic when

00:50:08

parents were at home more, children

00:50:09

were more at home home and they had to

00:50:12

find a way, right, because the parents

00:50:13

were working, but there was a lot

00:50:15

of pressure, difficulty sleeping, so I

00:50:19

said that Libra is like that, well, then

00:50:21

avoid it, right, at night, of course, there will be this

00:50:23

popcorn, no problem, but it can

00:50:27

disturb the child's sleep, so If

00:50:30

you're going to do it, it's obvious that it's going to be with the

00:50:32

intention of having a quality period there,

00:50:34

also choosing very well, so you

00:50:38

're bringing, you know, very good material and

00:50:40

I think this is a very cool

00:50:41

feature, but choosing the material very well,

00:50:43

curating it But

00:50:46

they need to look at what the child is

00:50:47

watching, just leave it there until then, at the mercy

00:50:50

of the little videos that keep playing, right?

00:50:52

It's very complicated because the child

00:51:00

Oh, no content there that's inappropriate,

00:51:03

you know, and so just a second, right? It's

00:51:06

access to pornography access to

00:51:10

explicit sex drugs bullying Cyber bullying

00:51:13

there are a lot of dangerous things, right? That's why

00:51:16

when you touch the distance

00:51:18

there, the more you have

00:51:20

parental control, I'm talking about parental control,

00:51:22

that's it, you know what your child

00:51:24

is watching Wow, he doesn't have it

00:51:25

intellectual capacity and

00:51:27

maturity to decide and it shouldn't be

00:51:30

you who should decide then you will do

00:51:33

this curation and be more careful

00:51:36

Enrico he doesn't have access to your cell phone but

00:51:38

when he sees you working because

00:51:40

you are an influencer then your cell phone

00:51:41

is always there his hand, even

00:51:43

often filming Enrico himself, right, he

00:51:45

doesn't question what it's like, sometimes

00:51:47

he asks him to take a photo,

00:51:49

sometimes of us, oh, let me take a

00:51:51

photo just for that, not to watch the

00:51:53

content, so I've just shown it what is

00:51:57

my Instagram and why sometimes it

00:52:00

clicks follow on Instagram and what is

00:52:02

Instagram mom I said Instagram that's it

00:52:03

daughter like a photo album

00:52:05

even son you have millions of

00:52:07

followers what people do I

00:52:09

follow you

00:52:11

he's following me, right?

00:52:14

so I had to explain but he is not

00:52:17

interested he doesn't ask for a cell phone he

00:52:19

doesn't see a cell phone his tablet is in the

00:52:23

corner so we use the tablet

00:52:25

like this as a last resort when we are

00:52:28

traveling by car the waiting time

00:52:30

when He's traveling by car and even

00:52:33

then I take the book to paint, I

00:52:35

take so many things, I go in the backseat

00:52:37

with him to

00:52:39

interact, when I see that there's no

00:52:42

other way, I make a drawing, a

00:52:45

film and sometimes he falls asleep, that's

00:52:49

it. At home he doesn't have a tablet he goes

00:52:52

to school in the morning in the afternoon he has

00:52:55

swimming lessons or stays at home with

00:52:57

activities at home which are me and the two

00:53:00

girls who work there who are not the

00:53:02

mainstay but who he loves and who are my

00:53:05

parents they also live, they are neighbors Wow, in the

00:53:07

condominium, so then he doesn't, grandpa, then there

00:53:10

he does things with grandpa, these recipes, he

00:53:12

does things with my mother, he goes to the

00:53:15

condominium to play in the playground, so

00:53:16

he doesn't ask, he doesn't ask to see,

00:53:19

he really doesn't have the habit. to see and

00:53:21

what I say when we're going to do

00:53:23

something, it's like this, family, it's not at

00:53:25

bedtime, it's usually the end of the

00:53:28

day, nice, you know, so instead of the

00:53:32

end of the afternoon, like we do, when it

00:53:35

starts to get dark, it's the time At the

00:53:37

movies we close everything and do it, you know, I

00:53:38

loved it and then we go by, I do it,

00:53:42

I read with him, I keep painting, he got sleepy,

00:53:46

let's pray

00:53:49

and he goes to sleep early, he sleeps at 8:30 and he

00:53:53

always asks, pray for me, mom.

00:53:55

So that I don't have a beautiful nightmare,

00:54:03

it's important for us to look at this issue of

00:54:05

content, you're talking about,

00:54:07

certainly, you know, it's edifying,

00:54:11

values, I don't read anything that's too long

00:54:13

either, because then the child does

00:54:15

n't have much patience, so some

00:54:18

shorter content and I'm I interact there

00:54:22

and sometimes we like it, it's getting colder and it

00:54:25

fuses a microline. He likes

00:54:28

all the little things.

00:54:42

What I say is avoid the

00:54:44

cell phone, the tablet, if you want to use it, use

00:54:46

the television more, put a

00:54:48

much greater distance, right, from the child, say By Luz,

00:54:51

by her little finger, By Luz and by her

00:54:53

little finger, because she won't be able to keep

00:54:55

changing, you will have greater control

00:54:57

both and also the TV on the cell phone is also

00:55:00

possible, but you can reduce the brightness, right? You can

00:55:03

control the gigantic TVs today.

00:55:16

two daughters, one is 8 months old and the

00:55:18

other is almost three years old, so Claro, the

00:55:22

eight-month-old one, doesn't see it but she's three years old.

00:55:25

Sometimes we put a drawing of

00:55:26

something she likes, but this way it's

00:55:29

very punctual, like Karina said, I

00:55:32

say That way, she will stay for 6 hours,

00:55:36

it's a part of her day, it's not

00:55:39

her life, technology, she has to be in

00:55:42

our favor, she can't be us, she

00:55:44

can't be controlled, dominated by us, we

00:55:47

need to control, so this brings

00:55:50

what we is doing there if the parents are

00:55:52

perhaps in fact losing

00:55:56

this control and they often parents

00:55:59

know when this control is

00:56:03

completely gone because they

00:56:05

can't do it anymore and the child who cries

00:56:07

all the time I say that if you take the

00:56:09

screen away child

00:56:11

Of course, it's not like that, pick it up and drink it, you won't

00:56:13

watch it anymore, it's too hot

00:56:15

here, time is up, you're going to

00:56:18

watch this little video and that's it, right?

00:56:24

thing and that's it,

00:56:26

get ready, accept it, say,

00:56:29

okay, Oh, I'm going to do something else and that

00:56:30

's why she's not among those who are addicted,

00:56:32

because it's really something that's addictive, yes

00:56:34

now, little by little, too, right, I see my

00:56:38

mother is a speaker, right, so she also has some

00:56:40

videos on YouTube, these things about

00:56:42

my mother are on her Instagram, etc. and there

00:56:45

's a video there that she made and such, for

00:56:48

example, taking away the child's pacifier, right,

00:56:50

you don't go and take the pacifier all at

00:56:53

once, sometimes it's not a child, you feel it

00:56:54

and so on. Then she has a trick there that she

00:56:57

cuts little by little, as if she

00:56:58

were wearing

00:57:01

the pacifier like that. There's a point when

00:57:02

he'll have nothing, she says because she

00:57:06

knows everything. You eat some fruit, and she finishes it, and

00:57:09

so on, you play, I don't know. What Pedro

00:57:12

finished here, son, and so on, I don't know how to

00:57:15

build it little by little so that it doesn't

00:57:18

become a painful process, like it

00:57:20

starts like that, little by little, he's

00:57:21

realizing that it's ending, I don't

00:57:23

know what, you understand, I don't know, I remembered

00:57:25

that. Now yes, you had your mind here now

00:57:28

I'm here thinking about you being very

00:57:30

hardworking and taking care of this and

00:57:32

spending time Because it's funny, right?

00:57:34

Responsible motherhood and fatherhood

00:57:37

require time, right? And time is of no use,

00:57:40

sometimes I hear this thing about

00:57:42

quality time, oh no but in reality

00:57:45

everything is time there, right? And then you

00:57:48

undertake this time, you do this and I

00:57:50

'm thinking here now, I don't know if

00:57:53

your girls have already arrived but Enrico has already

00:57:54

arrived,

00:57:56

all this work but the child goes

00:57:58

to school and the little friend has a cell phone

00:58:00

or else all this work goes to

00:58:02

school and the little friend is, I don't know, with a

00:58:05

pimp vocabulary with something like

00:58:07

that you deal with because you are

00:58:10

caregivers from the inside out, right, how do

00:58:13

you manage this control from the

00:58:15

outside out, do you want to start, look, first

00:58:19

you have to choose right, where are you going to

00:58:22

put it, know the place, who, right? What type

00:58:25

of teaching is being given, who

00:58:28

are the teachers, you have to be very

00:58:31

careful? Who are they? What is the

00:58:34

method? Is

00:58:41

there any change

00:58:43

in his vocabulary, attitude,

00:58:46

behavior, asking? You know, sometimes

00:58:49

he's like, oh, suddenly he starts doing

00:58:53

something that I don't think is good, but he has to

00:58:56

learn it.

00:59:00

Okay, it's not good, but

00:59:03

why does that person do it? I said it,

00:59:05

but everyone has a rule, so sometimes

00:59:07

maybe their mom thinks it's good.

00:59:09

Let me explain why I do

00:59:11

n't think it's such a thing, so yeah. everything is

00:59:13

explained, everything is explainable, conversational and

00:59:17

showing that it is not because the other does what the

00:59:20

other says, it is that that person who

00:59:23

is right, you show your point of

00:59:25

view, explain your point of view, why

00:59:28

and it has been enough

00:59:33

in the office, you see this a lot see,

00:59:36

I see it a lot, so that's it, I think there's

00:59:39

the issue, obviously, of the door

00:59:41

to the inside, as you said and Karina

00:59:44

said, but first the parents, they have to

00:59:48

be responsible, right, in my

00:59:50

view, my conception of education

00:59:54

first than the parents, they they have to be

00:59:56

responsible for their children's education Ah,

00:59:58

but the school will educate Yes the school

01:00:01

will educate But those who will bring the

01:00:02

principles and values have to be the

01:00:04

parents, right? And at the same time the parents

01:00:06

will also be there looking at what the school

01:00:08

It's teaching by making a good choice of

01:00:10

a school so

01:00:12

understanding if it has to do with values

01:00:15

with what you believe in with the type

01:00:17

of education you want to give

01:00:19

your children and it's logical it's really

01:00:23

100% we won't have it but We have

01:00:25

to be sure of what we are

01:00:26

teaching them, you know, knowing

01:00:30

what the principles and values that we

01:00:33

are bringing will have a greater impact, so

01:00:35

the voice of the parents in the

01:00:38

family has to be stronger than the

01:00:40

others. for children and they have to look at

01:00:43

the value and the things they have to look at.

01:00:45

This is with time, dedication of time

01:00:48

and it takes work, it takes work, it takes work to

01:00:51

have a child, but that's it, we are

01:00:54

building another human being, we

01:00:55

are preparing this person to be an

01:00:58

adult to be an individual to be,

01:01:00

right, the next leaders, the Legacy that you

01:01:03

are leaving, so it is within this

01:01:06

responsibility, bringing it a little,

01:01:08

that you need to have this awareness that

01:01:11

parents also need, there is more of this

01:01:12

awareness, but it is worth it, right? It's

01:01:14

really worth it,

01:01:17

I think that more than us

01:01:19

asking a question, I was here wondering

01:01:21

if there was any message and then feel free to do

01:01:24

so, without rushing, that you, from

01:01:28

your heart, want to pass on, you know, we are

01:01:30

talking about things that are the most

01:01:33

important things in the world. life of a human being, right,

01:01:35

once you have children and a

01:01:37

family, it's unlikely that anything else will

01:01:40

be, at least, it shouldn't, right, be

01:01:41

above that. So these are such

01:01:45

profound and visceral issues for us, what

01:01:48

message would you have to give to these

01:01:50

parents, good me? I want to

01:01:54

pass it on to the parents so that at the same

01:01:55

time there is a charge, right?

01:01:59

There are so many things I have to do

01:02:01

and you are certainly watching.

01:02:03

This chat is because you want to

01:02:05

deliver good things to your children,

01:02:08

we all want to give good things things to

01:02:10

your children, but know that what your

01:02:13

child needs, he needs you, your

01:02:15

presence, your love, so even though

01:02:19

you can often seem

01:02:22

lost like that, I don't know if I'm

01:02:24

doing it right,

01:02:26

know that it means trust, right? Yes, you have the

01:02:30

capacity to be a good mother, a good father,

01:02:36

principles and values will often

01:02:39

be what will govern your home and that is what

01:02:42

is most important, right, in case we

01:02:45

have a home, right, that is also grounded, God

01:02:48

and I believe a lot that this is the most

01:02:52

important thing, right,

01:02:54

family, there is no more important thing, right?

01:02:55

God created the family, he wants a

01:02:58

well-founded home and that if you have

01:03:01

an alignment, right, between father and mother, a home

01:03:05

that has love, your child will have it, he

01:03:09

will have everything, right? He's going to have a good

01:03:11

example, he's going to have

01:03:13

unforgettable times, unforgettable memories,

01:03:16

exactly so in view of that, it

01:03:20

seems like that phrase, right?

01:03:32

My daughter is five years old, who is already three, I'm already with

01:03:34

the other one and sometimes I stay, I tell

01:03:37

my husband, I can't take it like that,

01:03:38

those days when you're very tired

01:03:39

and you haven't slept, right?

01:03:45

You say that, it goes by very quickly, right? And

01:03:49

you don't sleep anymore, you wake up at 6

01:03:51

am 5 am with the smile of

01:03:53

yours exactly, it's so worth it so

01:03:56

Invest in this Invest in your children

01:03:59

because that's it There's nothing more

01:04:01

important or more precious than this, it's going to be

01:04:04

so worth it from here 10 years from now,

01:04:06

20 years from now, it will be what will remain in your

01:04:10

life, it will be what will be worth it,

01:04:11

wonderful,

01:04:13

I think the main thing is that we don't

01:04:17

let go of the tasks of our

01:04:21

daily lives that our fears, sometimes

01:04:24

fear of making mistakes, that our own

01:04:28

emotional ups and downs make

01:04:31

us lose sight of

01:04:35

the real magnitude of being fathers and mothers the

01:04:40

blessing that it is that we can teach

01:04:44

a life we are there present as much

01:04:47

as we learn so that all this

01:04:50

that all this that can sometimes

01:04:52

overwhelm us Don't make it lose its

01:04:55

shine, right? The shine of being parents, both fathers, so many

01:04:59

mothers, so many men, so many

01:05:01

women wanting to be in peace and mothers, and

01:05:05

us who have this opportunity who have already

01:05:07

fulfilled this dream that let us

01:05:11

remember how beautiful this mission is, right, it

01:05:15

is one of the most beautiful Missions that

01:05:19

God gave to each of us as

01:05:21

human beings. Those who still don't know what their

01:05:24

parents did for them, right, we wouldn't be

01:05:26

here alive, right? We

01:05:28

enjoy every moment, right, with

01:05:31

gratitude, even though we

01:05:34

are tired, but we are grateful for

01:05:37

that, for the opportunity to serve, for the

01:05:40

opportunity to be there, looking into

01:05:42

those little eyes, teaching, learning, right,

01:05:46

and many times we are suffocated by

01:05:48

our fears, because of questions about why we don't knowing how to

01:05:51

deal with all that, right, that's what we

01:05:53

hold on to, right?

01:06:06

suddenly the father has a state and

01:06:09

also learns how to do it and the mother also

01:06:11

learns how to breastfeed, it's just

01:06:14

willingness, you just have to be there, ready for

01:06:18

it, right?

01:06:23

It's a

01:06:25

great opportunity for us to grow

01:06:28

as human beings, right,

01:06:30

and to sow that little seed that came from

01:06:33

us, right, and to make it blossom, and

01:06:36

then say, Wow, I did the right thing, I

01:06:38

was there, I followed every moment, I

01:06:40

did the best I did, the best I did. I

01:06:43

could, right, so we have this

01:06:46

awareness, right? Even in this

01:06:48

busy day-to-day routine, whenever

01:06:51

we don't lose sight of that, it's a

01:06:52

challenge. Quite a

01:06:53

Challenge. Saint Joseph Maria has

01:06:56

that beautiful phrase, right. Do what you should be doing.

01:06:58

you do, so that's what you

01:07:00

said a lot here about being in what you're

01:07:03

doing, right?

01:07:16

nullifying me as a

01:07:18

woman Why not, you're on another

01:07:20

level Since it's much more than

01:07:23

just being a woman, you are, you're there

01:07:26

fulfilling another role, having

01:07:28

the opportunity to grow, so you're not

01:07:30

being Lando, you're adding yourself,

01:07:32

so there's no such thing, you're not Is

01:07:34

your son competing with your daughter

01:07:36

or is it me or is motherhood not something

01:07:39

more? So this is not canceling yourself out, right? It's just

01:07:43

that the world is upside down and

01:07:45

sometimes it makes a woman think that she is

01:07:47

canceling herself out because she You're being a mother Imagine

01:07:49

he's nothing newer than that, right? It's

01:07:53

important that we find you on

01:07:57

all social networks, not on all

01:07:59

social networks, for people to see

01:08:01

you talking, I know that I know that

01:08:04

you two are very famous, right,

01:08:07

name drop? of you on Google it already appears

01:08:09

but sometimes the podcast, for example, is the

01:08:12

time for us to comment on

01:08:14

another social network other than Instagram

01:08:15

Look, I'm on Instagram, right,

01:08:19

Karina Bacchi, I have a podcast, which is the

01:08:22

positively podcast where I'm always

01:08:24

there weekly, you know, interviewing people

01:08:28

from the Christian World, from

01:08:32

ordinary people, like us, to more

01:08:35

knowledgeable people, to pastors, who will

01:08:39

be teaching us about the

01:08:41

word of God and how to put them into

01:08:43

practice, and also on my own

01:08:46

YouTube channel, which is Karina bac where every day

01:08:49

I also read Psalms, I

01:08:51

have

01:08:53

other content that

01:08:57

also has to do with motherhood

01:08:59

in these three places

01:09:02

and you are mine and they are the social networks

01:09:06

called Uncomplicated Pediatrics,

01:09:08

I have Instagram which is @pediatria

01:09:11

descomplicada my YouTube channel is

01:09:13

also Pediatria descomplicada

01:09:15

with doctor Kelly and there is also the blog

01:09:19

which is Pediatria descomplicada.com.br

01:09:22

there I will also always bring a little of the

01:09:24

day to day life I say it is more than

01:09:26

Pediatrics, right, I know it has that name,

01:09:28

but I understand that today, right, Much more

01:09:30

about motherhood, about raising

01:09:33

children, about education, right, a little bit of what

01:09:36

I show in my day to day life, but also

01:09:38

about my values of what I believe in

01:09:40

and also taking away Mothers' doubts

01:09:43

helping mothers to have a

01:09:45

more complicated and lighter motherhood, also bringing tips

01:09:49

for their daily lives

01:09:53

exactly girls, thank you very much What a

01:09:57

nice chat, you are a dear,

01:09:59

very cool, very cool for those who are at

01:10:02

home there Bye, thank you very much for being there

01:10:04

with us until now and until next time

01:10:08

[Music]

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Assine a Brasil Paralelo: https://page.brasilparalelo.com.br/seja-membro/originais-bp/pindorama/ _________ Como educar nossos filhos? Certamente esta pergunta está entre as mais difíceis de ser respondidas. Formar um ser humano sempre foi uma das questões centrais das filosofias. Então, para ajudar a respondê-la, nada melhor que ouvir aquelas que praticam diariamente esse ofício: as mães. Em tempos de influenciadores que falam sobre tudo, mães podem se sentir perdidas em meio a tantos stories, posts e conselhos: posso dar um celular para o meu filho?, exposição às telas é prejudicial?, como ensinar meu filho a ter uma rotina, dormir no mesmo horário? Dúvidas essas e outras que as convidadas respondem às milhares de mães e demais interessados que as acompanham diariamente. Nossa Conversa tratou também da percepção que se tem sobre tempos passados. A criação de antigamente era melhor? Como as telas mudaram a formação e educação das crianças? Por um lado, quem não se lembra das vitaminas “S, de sujeira, A, de amor e N, de natureza”? – olhamos para o passado com sensação nostálgica. Já, por outro lado, temos mais informações, mais certezas, mais ciência – mas também mais dúvidas. ___________ Confira nossa programação diária 👇 TERÇA-FEIRA / QUINTA-FEIRA, ÀS 20:00 - Conversa Paralela Em um cenário onde quase tudo parece repetitivo e previsível, as conversas paralelas podem ser as mais interessantes. Conduzido pelos influencers Arthur Morisson, Lara Brenner e convidados especiais, esse podcast da Brasil Paralelo fará você aprender conteúdos de alto nível sem se dar conta que está aprendendo. __________ Precisa de ajuda para assinar? Fale com nossa equipe comercial: https://www.facebook.com/unsupportedbrowser Já é assinante e gostaria de fazer o upgrade? Aperte aqui: https://www.facebook.com/unsupportedbrowser __________ Siga a #BrasilParalelo: Site: https://www.brasilparalelo.com.br/?src=948e5029fe434a5eab91c5b0e111fdb8 Instagram: https://www.facebook.com/unsupportedbrowser Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/unsupportedbrowser Twitter: https://twitter.com/brasilparalelo Produtos oficiais: https://loja.brasilparalelo.com.br/ ___________ Sobre a Brasil Paralelo: Somos uma empresa de entretenimento e educação fundada em 2016. Produzimos documentários, filmes, séries, trilogias, cursos, podcasts e muito mais. Nosso foco é o conteúdo informativo e educativo relacionado ao contexto social, político e econômico brasileiro.

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