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Video tags
Subtitles
Russian
00:00:01
[music]00:00:09
Moscow restaurant00:00:14
evening in the book I liked Martin Eden the00:00:17
most you know a very deep00:00:20
message when he was not popular he00:00:24
was not needed by anyone and he says this00:00:28
you know why you didn’t need me until I00:00:32
was popular because I’m talented00:00:34
Ai Sorry, I got distracted, this is some kind of00:00:37
reel from a new one from00:00:39
Kologriv, this is Jack London and London I00:00:43
just wasn’t there, that’s probably why I didn’t00:00:46
understand. What’s your favorite00:00:50
book Damn, listen, I don’t remember, I wrote VK in my00:00:54
status and Master Margarita Oh00:00:59
what good choice Listen, did you00:01:02
like this line of Yeshua and the00:01:07
procurator?00:01:10
It’s cool, listen, I’m actually sitting here thinking, but00:01:12
you and00:01:15
I are on our fifth date, and when I00:01:18
was getting ready for a date today, I was choosing between00:01:21
white and red underwear, and while I was thinking, I00:01:24
completely forgot and You can’t imagine anything,00:01:33
but I know that in the line of Yeshua and the00:01:35
procurator I liked the [ __ ]00:01:42
[applause] she can’t drive it in00:02:00
any way, and00:02:03
there the gate is already open, as if just00:02:05
drive in, they tell00:02:11
him, but he won’t drive in, maybe he has rear-wheel00:02:16
drive, I don’t00:02:19
understand I’m not distracting you in any way.00:02:26
Forgive00:02:29
me for the fifth date, and here I am, when I00:02:33
was getting ready for a date today. And I also have00:02:35
a friend like that, you know what she’s saying. Well, the00:02:37
main thing there is that it’s00:02:47
funny to protect yourself, but I prefer00:02:50
alternative stand-up comedy. Well, you know,00:02:52
there’s Sasha Malaya, Dima Koval, Boris Zeliger,00:02:57
nerd finished just jerking off the damn00:03:02
forty-year-old wait is it you me no00:03:05
no What are you no no about dzyuba00:03:09
it’s just me watching football, football00:03:13
is on and playing he’s just one on one with00:03:17
the goalkeeper came out the goalkeeper is already getting excited00:03:23
[applause]00:03:30
about the fifth date And yes the fifth00:03:34
date is such a first mini00:03:38
anniversary It seems to me Olenka Well, we are00:03:42
ready to move to a completely new00:03:44
level of our relationship. Oh well,00:03:48
yes, I would like to propose to you. Although I don’t00:03:52
know, maybe I’m rushing00:03:55
things, in general, let’s go to my place today after the00:03:58
restaurant.00:04:00
Well,00:04:03
can I really put on orthopedic00:04:06
insoles there and you and I how can we go for a walk00:04:09
around VDNKh there today the exhibition Russia00:04:12
Kogalym is showing Yes, [ __ ] her, you’re00:04:17
already being stupid, [ __ ] her man and00:04:22
you don’t have to yell no Vital wait, let’s00:04:25
listen, maybe say something important,00:04:34
take it for her Where is your animal passion00:04:36
man is this you don’t tell me, well, you’re00:04:39
not your wife, you just took this Sharpey for00:04:43
mating and I’m00:04:45
writing an audio message to her, recording it, he’s00:04:49
only listening to me, my Sharpei, I’m00:04:52
motivating him as00:04:53
if I have such a00:04:58
mortie, so00:05:00
very stupid, just Sharpey is a00:05:03
[ __ ] for me I tell him to [ __ ] her already and she00:05:08
also tells him [ __ ] me, well, [ __ ] in our00:05:10
own way, we are not00:05:13
interested in this [music] you can not disturb us at all00:05:16
please please So what was I00:05:17
talking about and you said that you are there passion00:05:22
sex let's go No I said insoles VDNKh00:05:27
Kogaly00:05:30
Yes,00:05:40
go listen man, it’s you for me,00:05:45
yes it’s me for you Damn scarf, you’re a [ __ ] in the back00:05:50
Drive, what is it anyway,00:05:53
they hinted at you and so hinted what other00:05:54
hints do you need from her, what other people do you need that00:05:56
person tells you directly without00:05:58
panties I’ve come00:06:01
you decided to insert it’s normal in00:06:05
general You look at what it’s like Look at it00:06:07
don’t look at her look at her tits are00:06:09
sticking out Here she has awesome tits sticking out00:06:13
She’s a doe just not a00:06:15
graceful woman Lan If only a doe had00:06:18
si Where did you find this schmuck Tell me where are you I00:06:22
found him on a quiz on Harry.00:06:31
We met in the Kata cafe,00:06:35
that Kata cafe is a cafe with cats, there is also a00:06:40
raccoon cafe, but I like cats more00:06:42
than00:06:44
women, don’t say anything in my direction, the [ __ ]00:06:46
will get infected00:06:48
[music]00:06:59
T of marriage and physical unity of the00:07:02
family in abbreviated form and00:07:07
Bites sit here on patricks pants [ __ ]00:07:09
live while Russia needs the Russians the00:07:13
Russians need the country pandas in the zoo and00:07:16
then the [ __ ] gets [ __ ] more often than00:07:18
you mean you grab her right now00:07:21
you put her in a taxi you go to your hut pile00:07:23
from the table This is all your stinking with00:07:26
bioni like that so you throw this [ __ ]00:07:29
comics in the other direction, all this whole00:07:32
set of ananist, you throw your [ __ ] out and00:07:34
let00:07:36
intercourse happen. What kind of intercourse do we need before that00:07:40
at least get to know each other00:07:42
better? Yes, the more she knows about you,00:07:44
the less she wants to weakly [ __ ]00:07:46
Hands on feet and quickly Let's go or what00:07:48
position do you like better just make a00:07:51
child wait dude what kind of00:07:54
child are you Well I'm actually doing this for00:07:57
fun What the [ __ ] is that a00:08:00
dolphin now everyone [ __ ] Sex should00:08:03
work in the interests of the country You look00:08:05
at your partner well take a good look look00:08:07
Well he's a natural born Father, look at00:08:10
him, this is such a man.00:08:12
He’s right here at the parents’ meeting, you00:08:13
can see from his slurp that he should be sitting in a00:08:15
Lisa00:08:16
hat, he’s not a face, but a monk, look like a00:08:20
goose, look at his shoulders, hunched wrinkles,00:08:23
deep, flat ass. Well, he00:08:26
should be somewhere there may be something good take a closer look at00:08:28
Stopudovo’s dick, everything has gone into the dick, give birth to him,00:08:32
give birth to him. [ __ ], I’m00:08:40
saying no, can’t you hear? I’m00:08:43
telling you, I don’t want children. You00:08:45
give birth to them first, then don’t want to. That’s the whole point of00:08:49
motherhood, how old are you? 27 2700:08:54
I have a Grandfather on my grandmother [ __ ] at 27 she no longer00:08:56
looked at the children at 27 they had already00:08:59
shot00:09:00
seven sexes they had 1200:09:04
children Well, there00:09:09
was Soviet productivity and00:09:13
you’re sitting here Ringo is sucking on a roll with a mochaccino00:09:15
for his money Yes, if only my00:09:18
grandfather had treated my grandmother mokachino she would00:09:22
give birth to four more grandfathers in one day they would fly out of her00:09:29
gave ate00:09:37
gave one dish one00:09:39
child ate gave birth ate gave birth pee00:09:43
ate gave00:09:45
birth It’s clear00:09:48
everything is getting shorter I don’t have time00:09:50
Let’s fill out the documents Wait00:09:53
What documents let’s give a00:09:55
state order for a child with Neil is with00:09:57
me la Well, I saw what’s with me00:09:59
Yes, let’s read and00:10:01
sign the landlord in the person of Vitaly00:10:06
And,00:10:07
accordingly, the giver in the person of Olga00:10:11
undertakes to00:10:12
conceive Nikolai no one Nikolai00:10:16
ordinary Nikolai small such a00:10:18
horse so small to conceive with your00:10:20
nose and with her cabbage soup And this not my lips Well,00:10:22
at the same time, you will find out what is not real00:10:29
Nikolaev Ivanov is a severe shortage of Stepanov is00:10:32
hard somewhere in the kindergarten on Tyoply00:10:35
Stan Lonely Egor Sits among the00:10:37
pike perch and Nurlanchik, and Egor has no one to knock00:10:41
eggs with at Easter Do00:10:47
n’t let Nikolai’s country00:10:52
Wait, so It’s impossible. I can’t00:10:55
give birth from the first person I meet. People from00:10:57
Zhiganov in fours give birth to00:11:01
nothing. Give birth. Kolya. Kolya gave birth thanks to the00:11:05
big Kolya. Kolya is not the same00:11:07
stunted one00:11:09
who walks along clean ponds and in00:11:11
an oversized [ __ ] the wind doesn’t blow him away00:11:13
because he has a liter of coffee in his hand No,00:11:15
not this Kolya, the hefty one, Kolya, the00:11:19
real one, who is oversized and clingy,00:11:22
who walks in linen pants with a sweaty ass,00:11:24
who eats stuffed cabbage rolls00:11:28
Just like that, six pieces at a time, who00:11:30
kisses as if he’s eating a man00:11:33
who has a [ __ ] boner even on birch trees and00:11:35
Voskhod that's what a good healthy00:11:39
Nikolai gave birth to in the country of a [ __ ] mechanic00:11:43
over there in the Oryol region two blacksmiths are00:11:45
required give birth to them give birth to a blacksmith Take00:11:59
out your generation to the fullest Give us a00:12:02
normal adequate birth immediately give birth to you You00:12:05
know00:12:06
Man you're right We'll do everything like00:12:09
you said now let's go That's how00:12:11
we'll do it let's go Nikolaev wait wait wait00:12:14
wait Come here come on here00:12:17
what's clearly obvious here Yes Well of course00:12:20
I'll leave the condom Here it's all00:12:22
go go stink to the point said00:12:27
[applause]00:12:45
No, there's no point in even00:12:47
trying guys guys I'm the boss00:12:50
department for increasing demographics in00:12:53
the country, take00:13:03
Use Use Use00:13:07
Anton And why did you come to see how they00:13:09
will give me a Michelin star? No, we00:13:12
won the apartment in the lottery, we came to get the keys00:13:14
guys Varya And what did you win from00:13:17
me? It’s just that a new client lives here. I00:13:19
came for the crystal button of the tube.00:13:21
Univer, 13 years old. after May 13 at 8 pm, do00:13:25
n’t you think that someone00:13:27
is burning above us? And if it’s like in the movie00:13:29
[applause]00:13:31
[music]00:13:32
saw the premiere on TNT00:13:40
[music]00:13:48
[music]Description:
Часики тикают! Рожать кто будет?! Где дети?! Смотри шоу #ComedyClub по пятницам в 21:00 на #ТНТ! Производство: Comedy Club Production ТЕЛЕКАНАЛ ТНТ в соцсетях: Rutube: https://rutube.ru/u/tnt/ ВКонтакте: https://vk.com/tnt Телеграм: https://t.me/TNT_television Одноклассники: https://ok.ru/tnt Comedy Club в соц. сетях: Rutube: https://rutube.ru/metainfo/tv/10/ Телеграм: https://t.me/comedyclubru ВКонтакте: https://vk.com/comedyclubru Одноклассники: https://ok.ru/comedyclubru
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