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Video tags
Subtitles
Russian
00:00:10
[music]00:00:19
[music]00:00:23
you want to send your products to the00:00:25
foreign market or buy imported00:00:27
goods,00:00:28
contact auto export he knows00:00:30
the way 7 and joint stock companies in the countries of00:00:33
Western Europe and North America and00:00:35
Africa an extensive dealer network in 10000:00:38
countries around the world 5000 service stations00:00:40
around the world act export00:00:43
will organize an exhibition of your products00:00:45
will hold a presentation will help in publishing and00:00:48
distributing advertising to strengthen00:00:50
your prestige abroad00:00:52
auto export will find sponsors for your00:00:55
events foreign partners to00:00:57
create joint ventures and also00:00:59
prepare constituent documents00:01:01
autohelp sport will become your reliable00:01:03
partner on the path to big business he00:01:06
knows the way Lately it00:01:36
has become fashionable to invent new words and introduce00:01:38
into the Russian language00:01:40
region alternative innovations conversion did not00:01:44
remain indifferent to us words and00:01:46
television before00:01:48
the program was called simply and clearly00:01:50
around laughter, that is, no laughter all00:01:52
around laughter, now there are full00:01:54
house programs and now finally an00:01:57
engagement engagement as I suspect, it means00:02:01
translated into a strange invitation so00:02:04
that I court and the audience00:02:06
with great joy engage in my00:02:08
engagement I want you waiting I everything00:02:39
seems wrong to me the fashionable00:02:42
modern statement that satirists have no00:02:44
work left, indeed many people00:02:48
say that journalists take away the bread of00:02:51
satirists that in any a modern newspaper is00:02:55
more funny than a work,00:02:59
even a famous satirist writer, it00:03:01
seems to me that this is not so for satire, there is a theme00:03:03
now we are sitting in this kindergarten of the00:03:06
State Institute of Theater00:03:08
named after Lunacharsky and it would seem that there00:03:13
is no one for satire 8 is a good kindergarten,00:03:18
but nevertheless, if the operators00:03:21
they will be able to show00:03:22
where the00:03:26
car is and the plan, the slogan00:03:29
was written by the students themselves, it’s difficult to somehow00:03:33
fantasize why they did it, I00:03:35
think that it was one of the members of the park and00:03:37
this institute, and so the students showed00:03:42
their love for him, they wrote the sound board,00:03:45
in general, of course, for satire00:03:48
[ music]00:03:50
absolutely inexhaustible possibilities,00:03:52
I think that the words of akyn are to some00:03:56
extent akin to a modern00:03:59
satirist again because they landed what he sees00:04:01
from these singers, I just went to00:04:08
this interview for this shoot and saw a new00:04:12
poster that was hung in Moscow,00:04:15
perestroika is a people's business, well, I immediately00:04:22
want to to comment means that this is the00:04:24
business of the people, that is, this is our00:04:26
government and the state does not concern00:04:28
how the people did, so you are00:04:30
rebuilding, examples can be given00:04:32
endlessly, it seems to me, unfortunately, that the00:04:37
further the further, the more reasons for00:04:41
satire and it seems to me that the satirist can00:04:46
help just by understanding some then there are00:04:53
problems that even journalism cannot cope with,00:04:57
because when a00:05:00
person laughs, he seems to00:05:02
treat this phenomenon kindly, after all, a00:05:08
certain kindness is inherent in laughter when00:05:12
Disney developed its00:05:17
animated films and00:05:19
developed drawings of, say, gnomes,00:05:22
he examined about 10 thousand drawings00:05:27
because at first the gnomes turned out to be00:05:29
very funny, unfunny,00:05:32
they turned out to be evil and that’s why they weren’t00:05:38
funny, and when the00:05:41
drawings of the ugly but kind gnome came out,00:05:45
then he accepted them for shooting,00:05:50
so of course I’m absolutely sure00:05:53
that there is kindness in laughter, and in00:05:56
modern newspapers there are modern essays00:05:58
and in general in modern journalism this00:06:00
kindness is not there, it seems to me that this is why00:06:03
viewers really love the genre,00:06:06
full houses, full stadiums,00:06:09
sports palaces, because let’s take the anti-alcohol00:06:12
campaign in many countries of the world, in00:06:14
civilized countries there is an00:06:16
anti-alcohol law, but is there anything00:06:18
like that in connection with00:06:21
anti-alcohol campaign, they threw out Pushkin's00:06:23
poems with each of the Russian language textbooks,00:06:25
let's drink nanny, where is the mug,00:06:29
that is, the great poet sets a00:06:32
bad example for Soviet children by getting his nanny drunk00:06:35
in the light of the latest regulations, and after all, the00:06:39
vineyards of the rarest varieties were completely cut down,00:06:41
such a crime is00:06:43
impossible anywhere, and the sanctions of00:06:45
party leaders and the most It’s insulting00:06:48
that they are never left without work00:06:50
to decide the title of People’s;00:06:52
to restore the title of People’s; to expel someone00:06:55
from the country for such and such and such; to00:06:57
invite him back to the country for the00:06:59
same thing; after all, Galich was accepted into the00:07:04
union of writers of those who excluded him from00:07:07
marrying hung portraits in those00:07:09
publishing houses from which he was kicked out of00:07:10
Vysotsky are published by those who banned him and00:07:13
such a situation everywhere it00:07:16
is impossible to watch TV, they brought us to the00:07:17
point that those who left are now like00:07:19
heroes00:07:20
and you and I are like traitors already stop00:07:22
remained in their own country,00:07:23
and the arrogant ones brand with shame those who00:07:27
did those things, that is, they say to themselves there00:07:29
is no topic at all, we were not at all, now00:07:30
new thinking has come to us and the topic is00:07:33
long over with us, my these are therefore an00:07:35
immediate shame to the dark which is with him and00:07:44
there and with him and we are always not my home and00:07:46
it’s not easy to always be mute and the anthem00:07:50
to rewrite the history of the CPSU every time to00:07:52
revise and they are ready to00:07:54
throw out anything from the history of the CPSU00:07:56
to ban the subject itself Windows is no00:07:58
longer the history of the CPSU00:07:59
they considered it, well, it’s ridiculous to teach00:08:03
this subject in our time, but the teachers00:08:05
remained to teach something it is necessary to00:08:07
introduce a new subject called long in length00:08:10
so that it is not clear what is being00:08:12
taught according to my socio-political00:08:15
ideology of the 20th century, but we walked there was no00:08:18
thinking left, the test when they write is00:08:19
abbreviated and the students say it has been sleeping for00:08:22
centuries,00:08:25
our poor homeland will00:08:28
never be short of idiots, we are black soil00:08:32
for idiots in weight I really want to00:08:35
dedicate the concert to our developed idiocy00:08:38
[applause] in00:08:43
general, it’s interesting to compare what they00:08:45
laughed at before versus now and what00:08:47
they will laugh at, let’s say, in 10 years,00:08:52
although in general the comparison is very simple: 1000:08:55
years ago they laughed at what they00:08:56
could laugh at; there was a strict00:09:00
censorship I’ll even give you this example: I was not00:09:03
allowed once in a story to print the00:09:08
phrase let’s go back to our sheep, one of the00:09:11
two characters says now let’s go back to00:09:12
our sheep and the censor crossed out this00:09:14
phrase, I asked him why you00:09:16
did that, he says on the heads, he’s hinting,00:09:20
at first I didn’t understand at all what he00:09:22
means then I ask, who are you00:09:23
referring to, he was scared and not at that00:09:25
game and I at no one, but nevertheless he00:09:28
wrote out this phrase; similar examples can be00:09:31
cited quite often at one time00:09:36
when I received a letter to the00:09:39
general secretary from grateful00:09:41
residents cities, I began to read from the stage00:09:45
in many cities, instructors from00:09:48
regional party committees came up and asked if00:09:51
I was allowed to read the00:09:53
story, the story was just being typed in a00:09:56
theater magazine and of course00:09:59
I didn’t have anyone’s official permission, but I understood how to00:10:03
deal with the bureaucratic apparatus,00:10:06
in general, to fight with a person you have to have his own00:10:08
methods,00:10:09
so when the00:10:10
regional committee instructors approached me, I always say yes,00:10:12
it’s allowed,00:10:13
and in Kiev, 1 instructor asked what00:10:16
number the permit told him: 87 13 MOC00:10:20
removed 1387, he could have said 4568, he00:10:24
wrote it down calmly, they left, they all00:10:26
calmed down and00:10:28
no one bothered me anymore in Kiev in00:10:32
general, my calculation was absolutely correct,00:10:34
they created such a bureaucratic00:10:37
apparatus that they can’t even really check the00:10:39
number of this permit, I feel00:10:41
sorry for the archaeologists of the distant future,00:10:45
how many00:10:47
mysteries will the poor people face if they conduct excavations on the00:10:50
territory of our country, for example,00:10:52
they dig up someone’s social obligations and00:10:55
even which begins with the phrase I undertake to00:10:57
come to work on time, and if they also00:11:00
find portraits of00:11:01
our leaders with whom we went00:11:03
to demonstrations, they will be00:11:04
very surprised why they pasted them on a00:11:07
plywood shovel00:11:09
and in the infancy of our00:11:12
writing will tell them our fence00:11:15
frescoes, they will only be surprised how this is the alphabet00:11:18
of the ancients consisted of only three letters,00:11:21
but in the future the local history museum00:11:23
will probably store many00:11:25
undeciphered editorials from our newspapers,00:11:28
since even we cannot really00:11:29
decipher what the resolution means to00:11:32
further deepen the expansion of00:11:35
constructive measures prints as a result of00:11:37
consolidation to improve the state of00:11:39
global interaction of all00:11:41
conservation structures ensuring more more00:11:44
intensification orders of workers of all masses00:11:46
on the basis of rotational priorities the future of00:11:48
normalization of deposits of the same workers00:11:50
on their own orders will not be easy for them to understand00:12:01
and our everyday life, the excavated shoes will certainly00:12:04
lead to the idea that we still00:12:05
have instruments of torture, but even with the00:12:09
mined details they will never be able to00:12:11
recreate our furniture00:12:12
they will never in their lives guess that00:12:14
our furniture is assembled exclusively with the00:12:16
help of three tools, a hammer and00:12:19
half a liter, in general, it’s hard to even imagine00:12:25
what they will think about us00:12:27
if they dig up a sculpture de bo00:12:30
milkmaid lucky enough00:12:33
to find 56 evacuation plans in case of00:12:35
fire which so far read, you will burn00:12:38
along with the plan to stumble upon 78 beach00:12:42
changing rooms open to the waist from below and00:12:46
finally get to the headstone on the00:12:49
grave of 8 viserion how often on glanders the00:12:52
fi and died in 1953 buried in 196200:13:06
this will be a mystery of riddles for them where he was00:13:10
staggering all this time00:13:17
alone joyfully we will never disgrace00:13:22
ourselves their reasoning for us in our00:13:23
state and never carry out these00:13:26
excavations because our state is00:13:28
eternal because civilization perishes only00:13:31
after the flowering of culture, which00:13:33
means we will not perish once,00:13:39
it seems to me that first of all the topic for a satirist00:13:44
should be his experiences, it’s painful00:13:49
to watch for something this should be the00:13:52
topic in the first place, so as not to be00:13:55
unfounded, I will give an example, well, from00:13:57
probably my00:13:59
own life, since it is inconvenient for me00:14:02
to give examples from the lives of other00:14:05
writers, but I’ll tell you about myself, for example,00:14:07
it hurts to hear how we00:14:12
say, we mean all of our00:14:15
people and will have until the Soviet people are not00:14:19
just Russian, and since we have spoiled00:14:22
our Russian native literary00:14:25
Pushkin language, it is all the more00:14:28
appropriate to speak in this place00:14:31
where he teaches language and stage speech to00:14:37
our young artists, where our young artists00:14:42
are trained in Russian classics00:14:46
literature, it’s absurd to imagine00:14:47
that, say, Pushkin did not marry but00:14:51
consolidated,00:14:52
looked at Goncharova, his name was childbearing, and00:14:54
at the same time had an alternative option in the00:14:56
neighboring region,00:14:58
I think that we have created a new type of language, the00:15:03
Soviet language00:15:06
is an anti-literary language that00:15:10
helps00:15:11
to spoil the thinking of a Soviet person00:15:14
who is an Asari of the day it thinking which00:15:18
transforms the personality into a unity and00:15:23
this language also helps to report without00:15:28
answering, that is, let’s say an official can00:15:33
say with inspiration from the podium that hell has begun, a00:15:36
load of melons00:15:37
from Azerbaijan, but you can also00:15:40
say they brought melons and watermelons,00:15:42
but if he says yes and not watermelons, then the00:15:45
people will ask where is it all again00:15:50
he can say lucky he says hell00:15:51
has begun the load he can’t say00:15:53
let’s say among pensioners he will00:15:55
definitely say among people who are00:15:57
pensioners and such bureaucratic00:16:02
word formations have become so integrated into our00:16:04
lives00:16:05
that they have become, as it were, a part of our00:16:11
chromosomal set and it seems to me00:16:14
no perestroika is possible00:16:18
without some kind of internal logic, and the logic00:16:21
must be reflected by the language; the Russian language is one00:16:25
of the greatest languages in the world, and even00:16:27
the Italians are jealous of the Russian language; they00:16:30
say that is why00:16:34
folk songs are so melodious because the language00:16:40
allows for a variety of melodies;00:16:47
what kind of song can be sung? with the words00:16:52
conversion region alternative because00:16:55
there are Russian words let's say00:16:59
positive negative no00:17:01
necessarily the00:17:02
statesman should say00:17:04
not positive but positive and not00:17:07
negative but negative because00:17:10
no one knows what it is just like00:17:12
again the functionary no one knows who it is it is00:17:14
themselves them and I will call you00:17:18
functionaries, they came up with such a00:17:20
name for themselves, yes, you are not responsible for your00:17:21
actions, what were you doing at work yesterday and the00:17:23
filter functioned, know he did it00:17:26
somewhere and functioned in the region, and what he00:17:29
did was conversion and it is impossible to understand00:17:31
what to demand from him after that, after all,00:17:35
this it’s a joke to sit for two years to sit on00:17:39
treasures in good hotels to gain access to the00:17:42
granaries of your homeland and at the same time miss out on the00:17:45
harvest, you missed out, well, of course, all your00:17:50
life you were prepared for the fact that there would be no00:17:52
harvest00:17:53
and suddenly the harvest was damned, which means that things were wrong with it00:17:57
in Russia,00:18:00
the harvest was bad, the00:18:09
head of government Ryzhkov speaks on00:18:13
TV and is surprised that we have a harvest,00:18:20
we’ll do everything, the guys will ask, as00:18:22
a result, a headquarters has been created to00:18:25
combat the harvest, they’re giving telephone numbers, and00:18:30
whoever wants carrots, call whoever wants00:18:33
cabbage there, right, they have00:18:35
the only way out of the situation00:18:37
is to get everyone out people to the fields and so that00:18:41
they are there [music]00:18:44
in this regard, I really want to00:18:47
mention this expression of the granary of00:18:50
the homeland, it00:18:51
seems to me that our functionaries very00:18:54
accurately came up with the expression of the granary of relatives.00:18:56
Since childhood, I must admit I00:18:58
wanted to understand where the granary of00:19:00
the homeland is, that’s where this place is where we00:19:03
have been pouring something into the whole country for 70 years with all00:19:04
the people every day pouring and pouring00:19:06
nothing, and so I traveled around the00:19:08
resort towns, you know, there are such00:19:10
sanatoriums there, I personally went there00:19:13
so we have the right to talk about it, here00:19:15
in which eight people rest from 40000:19:18
they serve this and they are the granaries of their00:19:20
homeland and they will never give them up,00:19:24
not when they pretend that they are00:19:26
leading us they will00:19:29
always cling they will cling not to the00:19:31
salary but to the granaries they have00:19:32
access to the granaries more than once you left00:19:35
GITIS I understand you are a student yes you00:19:38
have the subject of the speech scene, yes, tell me you00:19:45
are studying in the center that at the same time but not00:19:48
only hidden from the cohort you can speak00:19:50
can you on which kidney on the second say00:19:55
you are not the son of the compass of the text you cuti cuti00:19:58
cuti cuti cuti cuti stump from you you need00:20:08
a filter I am not ice but some simpler ones00:20:16
you’ll break along the highway and sucked on the dryer, you walked00:20:19
along the highway and sucked on the dryer, watch00:20:22
despite the fact that it’s cold you00:20:23
really pronounce the name, but00:20:27
you’re not just an artist, they’re just a00:20:29
tongue twister to say I’m looking for a confession of00:20:31
love with that tongue twister you can shoes the00:20:36
stump clean tell them and00:20:45
tell me please, but they teach you not00:20:47
only tongue twisters, not only but00:20:50
probably pronunciation yes yes definitely00:20:52
definitely cable those who are in agreement and00:20:55
there are cities00:20:57
but the agreement is in general then probably in00:21:00
life it’s not a mistake on stage with mistakes00:21:02
tell me but he teaches you how to pronounce00:21:05
the word begin we you say begin or00:21:10
begin to begin take an example at least00:21:14
accept busy some other words you00:21:18
know these well no have lo really times00:21:21
sniff a person catch I and in will aggravate00:21:27
tell you a young girl00:21:31
is better from Russian bookmark the words are taken00:21:33
as you think just00:21:34
well I have my own. On average, I’m00:21:36
interested in how young people feel about this,00:21:39
here’s how and not just how why00:21:41
why, you’ll agree, all the people already00:21:43
know and what to start taking the lesson00:21:46
to aggravate correctly 1 teacher of us00:21:48
was she spoke by means constantly00:21:52
constantly the subject itself is geography and it will become00:21:55
a straw there and it’s a means after all,00:21:57
this is an economic means there and what00:22:00
means of production he says means00:22:02
answering what means you get up and said00:22:04
stream well,00:22:05
basically everyone answer means00:22:08
because it’s already automatic, so by00:22:11
the way, by the way, I think that’s00:22:13
why they say sometimes you’re even ashamed00:22:16
when he says you want to start and00:22:18
I don’t want to start answering with it seems like we’ll00:22:20
issue some kind of challenge to my00:22:24
story because I worked as an engineer, a00:22:26
leading engineer once called me and00:22:28
asked you can you can’t you moved00:22:33
like that, but we can answer something and we can ask a00:22:36
question in full,00:22:38
you must answer to make out as an insult00:22:40
to insult the boss if you answer00:22:42
correctly, he said to him,00:22:44
yes of course, moreover, I decided to go back00:22:47
to the department and tell them and ask them whether00:22:50
or not we can exceed the plan,00:22:52
well then the poster appeared, graves00:22:54
to exceed the plan and 250 percent above the00:22:57
words were changed in the language in the dictionary then of00:23:00
course no, I’m joking, this is a story, but in00:23:03
fact, this is the story that I00:23:05
wrote, I must tell you that it was not00:23:07
published because the leaders00:23:09
told me to, and as soon as00:23:13
Leonid Ilyich Brezhnev passed away, this00:23:15
story was immediately accepted for publication in the magazine00:23:18
youth while he went through censorship and while he was going through00:23:23
the editorial board, Andropov didn’t come and00:23:26
Chernenko came and on the first day he said00:23:28
by sea and so you were never at 50.00:23:35
I’ll take it and right, joke face,00:23:39
story well, well, not only remains,00:23:43
if you study well, look, and00:23:46
if you speak correctly, start00:23:48
accepted, borrow from correctly, this is like00:23:52
this, you see the correct solution to how00:23:56
to pronounce these words, look at me00:24:00
then I often00:24:07
paid attention that in newspapers it00:24:10
became fashionable to write notes, the finale, yeah, you00:24:14
know, I hung silently, the00:24:19
harvest came, and always with such a very00:24:24
tearfully tender intonation, so00:24:26
paradoxical, it seems to them that this00:24:28
literature is so big, but it00:24:31
seemed interesting to me to fantasize about how to00:24:32
write such notes, honest phenol,00:24:36
ok, it00:24:40
came finally, in our seaside00:24:43
town the foxes00:24:44
gently warmed the radioactive sun, the00:24:49
buds on the trees swelled with streptococci00:24:52
and oars and floated across the sky sulfur Arnie's mace00:24:55
on you apples from this began the00:24:58
spring release of the treatment facilities of the00:25:00
main production00:25:02
waste production00:25:04
after the icebreakers after the ice drift00:25:07
heavy rose in the river water00:25:09
chums from warm regions returned to their homeland00:25:13
to die birds00:25:16
so the cuckoo asked itself the question00:25:19
how long to live Asta00:25:20
but did not have time kucuk note fell out of the nest00:25:24
by typing a call on the chest of fresh forest00:25:27
carbon monoxide the eagle00:25:28
soared into the clouds she hit an air00:25:31
hole00:25:32
the nightingale revealed his swan song00:25:34
whooped Following the cuckoo00:25:36
from this spring Havana, the lover of00:25:40
blood tried to burrow deeper into the00:25:42
ground but came across a high00:25:44
voltage cable in the markets,00:25:48
fresh nitrates appeared on the shelves,00:25:51
distant rumbles of thunder were heard00:25:53
somewhere, the Komsomolsk shock system exploded,00:25:57
and in the sea water in the rays of the spring00:25:59
sun the intestinal memory began to play merrily00:26:04
and the sea rushed rapidly, the streams of the city00:26:07
sewer quickly warmed the sea for the00:26:10
long-awaited swimming season00:26:13
[applause] have00:26:20
you noticed that the doormen in hotels00:26:24
unmistakably demand business cards00:26:26
only from ours, even if ours are dressed in00:26:29
everything that is not ours, apparently in our eyes there is00:26:32
something purely ours00:26:34
most likely they reflect the state of the00:26:37
soul of a person who is forbidden to wait at every step is00:26:40
not allowed inventory re-registration00:26:44
excuse us, interns00:26:46
hour 9 am to eleven pm only00:26:49
our person can be stopped at any time to00:26:51
require a passport registration to00:26:54
compare gender00:26:57
only with us people in Aeroflot can be00:27:00
driven to the drive well not yet in the00:27:04
septic tank, just00:27:08
build something right there, put up a00:27:10
notice, don’t get into it, it will kill, but here,00:27:13
wherever you go here, it will kill, and looking at00:27:15
the watchman at the entrance, you believe it00:27:20
will really kill,00:27:22
but try an honest man to invite a00:27:24
girl to visit his hotel,00:27:26
any watchman at the entrance is very will strictly00:27:28
punish you, keep in mind that we can00:27:30
only be a girl until 11,00:27:32
yes you can, but up to 11 in any country in the world,00:27:36
whenever you want then with a girl, but with us it’s00:27:39
only until 11 who was the first to think00:27:42
that it’s possible to be with a girl until 11 or he00:27:46
judges by himself00:27:47
maybe and only he can be up to 11,00:27:52
after all, a watchman is not a position, it’s a00:27:56
state of a person’s soul, one should be given the00:27:59
title of an honored watchman of the Soviet00:28:01
Union, a people’s watchman of the Soviet Union, the00:28:05
actors can be city committee instructors and00:28:07
generals, the waiters at home are right and the censors are right in00:28:10
what you wrote, how dare you still exist in our00:28:12
country many fools you are divulging00:28:15
state secrets00:28:17
instructions are a product of actors in00:28:20
garden plots dig no deeper00:28:22
build no wider cistern00:28:24
placed at a different angle non-00:28:26
socialist cistern00:28:29
work is provided only by00:28:31
definition of the registration certificate registration00:28:33
upon presentation of the certificate work for things with00:28:35
this wardrobe wardrobe responsibility00:28:37
does not apply to the English course we accept those who00:28:39
have passed fluorography one sandwich in00:28:42
one hand bonuses no more than half-time upon00:28:45
application abroad for analyzes00:28:47
sneakers for disabled people00:28:49
subscription to the Ogonyok magazine00:28:50
is provided 1st queue to those who00:28:52
subscribe to the weekly rabbits00:28:54
jerboas of the non-black earth strip of Russia00:28:57
for 15 years of work at one place00:29:00
to increase the salary by 6 rubles and reward with a00:29:03
valuable gift in the form of a00:29:05
gift tractor for 8 rubles made of life-size papier-mâché00:29:07
there is such a bitter00:29:11
parable in00:29:12
1917, on October 25, the revolution is00:29:17
sitting in her apartment, the granddaughter of the Decembrist00:29:19
hears noise on the streets and says the maids00:29:21
Masha, please look out ask the street00:29:24
what the noise is, the maid won,00:29:26
comes back and says joyfully, the lady of00:29:29
the revolution00:29:30
was happy, too, the lady was so happy,00:29:33
my grandfather dreamed of a revolution, and you look again,00:29:35
ask for what they want, what the00:29:37
maid demands, the words are profitable, the lady says they00:29:39
want there to be no rich people,00:29:42
my grandfather says to the guy, disappointed00:29:44
dreamed that there would be no poor people for more than 70 years,00:29:52
our people's watchmen have been struggling with the fact that there00:29:55
were no rich people in our country and it is also00:29:57
desirable that there were no smart people to00:29:59
create such a thing for a person to match himself in00:30:02
Sochi at a rental point on the beach there is00:30:04
still a whole inflatable hanging at his disposal00:30:06
mattresses are issued only to foreigners00:30:09
and ours only have a puncture, you swim, a00:30:15
citizen of the Soviet Union, preferably00:30:18
a mess00:30:20
in Kuibyshev, the hotel administrator personally00:30:23
told me that they have an iron on the00:30:25
third floor, an00:30:26
ironing board on the sixth squad through00:30:29
which there was one on the ninth and nothing00:30:32
can be moved due to00:30:33
fire safety precautions In Riga, on the00:30:36
bank of the Riga canal, right next to the00:30:39
water, there is a house of swans, but it is not00:30:42
written enough for outsiders, entry is prohibited,00:30:45
well, who would think of crawling from the water00:30:50
into the house of swans, or is it written for00:30:56
outside swans,00:30:58
all these prohibitions are reflected in the00:31:02
hunted pupils of the Soviet man00:31:04
and The doorman sees this very well and00:31:06
in anticipation of the next thrashing, they00:31:08
joyfully carry us to their favorite00:31:11
song, hello, country of heroes, and he is right00:31:14
because only a hero can survive in a country with so00:31:16
many prohibitions; there is a00:31:22
literary Pushkin, well,00:31:26
that’s what we call Pushkin’s language,00:31:30
which our great classics wrote00:31:33
for a reason We are now conducting this filming at the00:31:38
Lomonosov monument,00:31:39
after all, Russia has always been rich00:31:42
in personalities, well, I’ll remember some lines from00:31:45
Nikolai Vasilyevich Gogol or Pushkin, let’s00:31:47
say Gogol, a rare bird will fly to00:31:50
the middle of the Dnieper,00:31:51
it’s impossible to imagine everything00:31:55
that Gogol wrote, a rare00:31:57
representative of the bird family will fly00:32:00
then in the middle of the main water artery of the00:32:02
Ukrainian SSR, everything in a person should00:32:07
be beautiful and the soul and body of clothes and00:32:10
thoughts also could not be written by the Czechs in a00:32:13
human individual everything should00:32:16
correspond to00:32:17
social norms and the head part and the00:32:21
internal human factor00:32:25
seems to me that our newspapers have picked up00:32:29
this bureaucratic language than the00:32:32
swords of our people have been very spoiled, after all, if we look00:32:37
in any newspaper we will definitely find00:32:40
the expression there, let’s say with a glorious tread, that’s00:32:44
how it is, for00:32:46
example, I can’t depict to you how you00:32:50
can go with a glorious tread or in the vanguard for00:32:53
5 years, where does that mean that we are ahead for 500:32:55
years as behind and we are always moving00:33:00
routes of creation, also00:33:03
completely unknown to anyone, routes and we00:33:07
move by taking Reggie economic levers, a00:33:10
very cheerful picture turns out to be00:33:12
glorious after being at the forefront of the five-year plan,00:33:14
taking economic levers by00:33:17
routes of creation, we are always moving00:33:20
to the bins of our homeland, but00:33:21
there is a Russian literary one, I’ll once again00:33:27
emphasize Pushkin’s sex, I remember00:33:29
at least ugh Pushkin’s lines from Eugene00:33:31
Onegin yesterday at the left feast00:33:34
rs flew off like a marshmallow, it wouldn’t have been deprived of a drink in it,00:33:37
and the mothers of the floor of the red steps flew00:33:40
into the noisy crowd for the odalisques, the young00:33:42
last sound of the last speech I00:33:45
managed to catch from her, I dressed her in black sable00:33:48
close to her shoulders on the curls of her dear head I00:33:52
threw a green ball, I threw examples and not into the crowd of00:33:55
lovers, I pushed you apart,00:33:57
I love you in one city, the00:34:21
masseur was connected to the train of 200:34:24
ninth years, well, of course, the absurdity of the floor,00:34:27
because imagine yourself in the place of those people00:34:29
who have tickets for the 9 hopper car, all00:34:32
normal people can count to 900:34:34
so they know for sure the 9th car is the00:34:37
one immediately after 8 and not the one that00:34:41
moved,00:34:47
so everyone naturally sat down together in the 1st 9th00:34:51
carriage and the train drove off, she was00:34:53
very surprised and the conductor 2nd 9th, which00:34:57
not a single person had the strength to do, went to the00:35:00
foreman of the train in 1 year my fire is on fire the carriage is00:35:02
empty, then he says which 9 he made00:35:05
the departure angry again, something was mixed up as always at the00:35:08
ticket office and gave a radiogram to the next00:35:10
station to sell tickets to you, for everyone00:35:13
who received tickets at the 9th main station, they00:35:14
were also normal people, they also knew how to00:35:17
count until the 9th floor, they understood that you are00:35:20
the one after 8 right away00:35:21
so naturally they ran together at 100:35:23
9 can the conductor 1 9 gonna have everyone00:35:26
drinking tea a long time ago went to bed in horror00:35:28
were comrades you that I don’t have a00:35:31
single free seat at all, this is some kind of00:35:33
mistake, run quickly to the train foreman and00:35:35
run quickly because he is in the00:35:36
first carriage and you still have to run00:35:38
to notify all three minutes, those races00:35:40
are running with things to the mourners and children, the00:35:42
first carriage is met by the very surprised00:35:44
train foreman asks where in such a00:35:46
colleague00:35:47
they are burning, we are from the 9th carriage there are all00:35:49
doubles, the foreman understands that he he does00:35:51
n’t understand something,00:35:52
but what he doesn’t understand, he doesn’t00:35:54
understand yet, so he really quickly00:35:56
separates them into empty seats in the00:35:57
first carriage since there00:35:59
are three minutes in front of the army and gives departures to the train00:36:01
and the train is moving at this time, the00:36:05
conductor 2 9 comes to him, my Hebrew the00:36:10
carriage is empty, the foreman begins to slowly00:36:14
go crazy00:36:16
and disbelief and it is clear that the00:36:18
9th carriage is really empty and he then00:36:22
begins to count the carriages and calculate00:36:24
disney and finds out that such a00:36:25
mistake has occurred, they valued 2 of you00:36:27
and then he decides to fix the00:36:29
turret and returns together. gives00:36:31
a radiogram to the next station00:36:33
to uncouple 9 cars,00:36:38
it was at night, those who hitched were also00:36:44
normal people, they00:36:45
could count to 9,00:36:48
so they cordoned off the 9 1 9 car with peacefully00:36:53
sleeping people and took it to a siding,00:36:56
after which they reported to the foreman of00:37:00
the train, the foreman, to the messenger sighed with relief00:37:02
and let the train depart, I00:37:04
'll go eat at00:37:06
this time, the00:37:09
conductor of the 2nd 9th carriage came to him and00:37:14
said my carriage is empty,00:37:17
I don't know about Palmer's madhouse to the00:37:20
foreman of this belt after this flight,00:37:22
only this story was told to me by a man00:37:24
who was traveling in the first ninth year00:37:27
late at night he went out to smoke, he smoked,00:37:32
it was called to the curia, he drilled, he smoked, he00:37:34
smoked the curia, he smoked the druid brush for a long time, we stood00:37:36
again for a long time, he lit the curia on the stop and in the field, he smoked on the00:37:39
burn, he couldn’t stand it, he looked out the window,00:37:41
not in front or behind the cars, not00:37:45
a voice and the moon on the siding when he00:37:49
told me this, I laughed so much especially00:37:51
when he told me how he was an [ __ ] about everything, his00:37:52
mother gave birth, they jumped out and tried to00:37:54
tell where they were, I laughed so much00:37:56
that he got offended at me and said you00:37:59
’re laughing in vain, by the way, there’s nothing00:38:01
funny about this,00:38:02
by the way, and everyone in this carriage was traveling00:38:04
on a tourist package to Hungary00:38:09
[music]00:38:10
[applause]00:38:16
while we were driving from the Clematis monument along the00:38:19
Pashkin cog, I thought that if00:38:23
Clematis, in our time, came to do00:38:25
with his wallet in the Moscow00:38:28
state varsity, you would tell him00:38:30
that he belongs to neither the contingent of the00:38:32
author of their country in the wallet is not only the00:38:35
assortment that the00:38:37
teaching staff needs,00:38:39
you see, dear friends, that in the name of00:38:42
Pushkin it was taken into the forests, in my opinion, the time has come to00:38:44
take the same forests and our native00:38:47
Russian language and carry out a complete00:38:49
restoration, I have such a00:38:52
proposal, send us your examples of00:38:55
the bureaucracy you have heard of00:38:57
regardless of whether the authors of the karate digger are00:38:59
again your bosses, local00:39:02
or00:39:04
higher, send examples of00:39:07
instructions, statements of explanatory00:39:10
notes, and some other ends of ours with00:39:16
lyricism in which we all00:39:18
laugh, we will read them out in our00:39:22
program of engagement and do not hesitate to00:39:24
attribute their surnames to the authors, they do00:39:28
n’t understand at all, they have a different00:39:30
type with a different way of making jokes,00:39:34
they have a more rectangular thinking in00:39:36
the West, they don’t have the same level of development as00:39:38
ours, after all, aren’t you from poverty just like00:39:40
them stupid qi tasty00:39:43
I think that human thinking is akin to00:39:46
the layout of streets in cities you know00:39:49
how in New York the street is located in the00:39:51
center of Manhattan meetings 3033 all in parallel00:39:55
then avenue avenue avenue avenue everyone00:39:57
bring dikul arno and they have the00:40:00
same thinking rectangular dull00:40:04
square head, but in our case,00:40:06
mind you, go out00:40:08
alley ditch garbage dump dead end poster00:40:12
we are developed because of this we are stuck on00:40:16
scientific thinking and they will never00:40:20
catch up with us we have overtaken all the countries of the world00:40:22
in humor this is the only thing in which we have00:40:24
overtaken all the countries of the world in humor in00:40:26
agriculture in general in00:40:29
industry I for example tried to00:40:31
tell foreigners the case which00:40:33
I often told from the stage ours is00:40:34
always laughing really stopped00:40:36
at the regional committee sky hotels in the city of steel00:40:38
harty and he locks the door for me only to the00:40:40
toilet from the outside00:40:44
well, you laugh, you are normal people00:40:47
right well right of course it’s funny00:40:49
outside why would there be a member of the regional committee in00:40:52
front like that to say we immediately catch up with this00:40:55
situation, they don’t understand it, it’s00:40:58
also impossible to explain that the stopper doesn’t match00:41:00
the size of the hole in the sink, here00:41:02
we are again laughing, or the shower flies off and they00:41:04
hit me on the head with a strainer, or I00:41:07
stayed in the same hotel and then00:41:09
this one did it, described it, well, you want00:41:12
the hallway to eat nothing, hangers are not00:41:14
flammable, they hitches from the windows blow straight00:41:17
into the bed, the windows are sealed up,00:41:20
they are aimed at the laws so that the00:41:23
muzzles of the mouth are directed directly into the pillow, the jet hits, and the00:41:26
pillowcase with the pillow, the dimensions you00:41:28
understand, and strongly, and the side of the00:41:32
pillow, that is, all night long in the word neck00:41:36
with a pillowcase quietly with itself the00:41:44
duvet cover is naturally square and the00:41:46
duvet is rectangular, that is, they are happy with00:41:50
three points, that is, they must lie along a00:41:53
sinusoid00:41:54
on the mattress and and diagonally with a00:41:56
duvet cover under the duvet cover,00:41:58
this again is to combine everything, so to speak,00:42:00
the brain of foreigners cannot be civilized00:42:03
only we immediately comprehensive and slim in00:42:06
this regard, and there is also no chair in front of00:42:09
the table, an ottoman, that’s how it used00:42:12
to be useful to put it, and a00:42:20
bathroom mirror just below the chest for shaving for00:42:23
shaving, I say when I was shaving,00:42:26
the maid came in, yes, I had to explain for a long time00:42:30
what I was doing in this position and00:42:32
the garbage chute, judging by the sounds, passed00:42:34
next to my bed, and judging by the smells, it00:42:36
also ends nearby, you00:42:38
see you laugh and quite hard, yes,00:42:41
I’m telling about this bolts on the00:42:44
other side to a foreign professor00:42:46
from Oxford of the Russian language, he doesn’t even00:42:49
smile, he looks at says if this is00:42:54
a joke I’ll explain why the latch is on the other00:42:55
side00:42:56
and how I will explain to him why the latch is on the00:42:59
other side00:43:00
I need to start explaining in 191700:43:04
why we have a latch on the other side, the00:43:06
cops are against it, but for them it’s really true that00:43:11
when you tell them jokes they don’t laugh00:43:14
because here again there are situations where the latch is00:43:16
on the other side on the other hand, for them it’s not a joke,00:43:18
it’s a problem, well, a nuisance and doesn’t look00:43:21
at us with sadness then,00:43:22
but when you talk about something seriously00:43:25
about what’s going on with us, they think that00:43:27
you’re joking like that, everything topsy-turvy,00:43:29
because it’s impossible to explain to them what’s going on with us00:43:31
what's going on if you start seriously00:43:33
tells them, of course they always ask to00:43:36
tell you about what we have, how it is with us, as00:43:39
soon as a Russian finds out, I immediately run up to kiss them, they00:43:41
start feeling sorry for them, I don’t know us,00:43:45
it’s difficult to say, they basically don’t00:43:47
know anything about us, they love Gorbachev, they00:43:49
really love Russians, they don’t they know they do00:43:51
n’t know anything that the bears are standing in the streets00:43:53
and Gorbachev is leading more and more of00:43:55
life and that’s why they immediately kiss, as if in00:44:01
their own face, they kiss Gorbachev all the time, I’m00:44:04
tired of it, to be honest, for me they care so much about00:44:07
these questions that I don’t00:44:10
want to tell how In our country, washing dirty linen in public00:44:13
I just stopped saying that00:44:15
Russian in some situations is00:44:17
impossible, I really got tired of it, I just00:44:19
tried to laugh it off, laugh it off at the00:44:21
impossible, they don’t understand jokes, it’s a00:44:23
very absurd situation, you00:44:26
often find yourself in an absurd position, for example,00:44:27
sitting with a friend in a restaurant and a Creole00:44:30
waitress serving you, hearing Russian00:44:32
speech it's coming from where you're from and I've already00:44:35
come up with a cliché and from this cliché I00:44:38
answer I say we're from China00:44:41
any of ours laughed and realized that they didn't00:44:44
want to talk to him until they turned away not00:44:47
only not Americans Americans said00:44:48
from China means from China she speaks and00:44:53
who's nationality is Gray the Chinese are pure00:44:59
granite of the dirty, so all the time the conversation00:45:04
goes on like dragging through the same gate and but00:45:08
if they already understand that you are Russian,00:45:10
of course it is impossible to explain to them, well,00:45:13
tell me how can you tell any of the civilized00:45:15
people00:45:16
that our whole country is treated00:45:20
on TV for free00:45:27
no I can say that we have00:45:30
Kashpirovsky’s Chumak basins charging the basins in the morning in the morning,00:45:33
in principle, I can00:45:35
say but they don’t understand charging the00:45:38
basins, it’s generally necessary to the00:45:41
Tatar-Mongol yoke to start00:45:42
explaining what it is00:45:44
to charge the basins and then drink from the00:45:47
adhesions in the brain go to sleep or where I’m on00:45:53
fairly good terms with Anatoly00:45:54
Kashpirovsky00:45:55
and he often shows me letters00:45:57
that come not as if according to non-script00:46:00
I can tell again some00:46:02
civilized person00:46:03
that in our country some people during00:46:04
Kashpirovsky’s sessions press their00:46:06
sore spot to the TV screen00:46:10
so that the adhesions dissolve completely about this is00:46:13
all our medical bacchanalia,00:46:19
it’s not even a medical godfather of years, it’s00:46:22
just a way out of some kind of coven, because it’s00:46:25
impossible to tell anywhere in the world there is no00:46:28
such passion for psychics,00:46:30
of course among psychics there are00:46:32
decent talented people who00:46:35
help their patients, as a rule, these are00:46:38
people who are not very good, so to speak, well,00:46:41
they take money for my work, because00:46:44
this is a morally defined position, but00:46:46
for example, psychics, when I found out00:46:49
about them myself and had a lot to do with them, I had a lot of relationships00:46:52
for many years because00:46:54
from hopelessness the mouse was driven to00:46:56
despair by the00:46:57
lack of medicines by the00:46:59
ill will of the district doctors00:47:01
I was given in America from tablets for00:47:03
sciatica,00:47:04
well, like tablets for sciatica, one00:47:06
star of our country got sick in00:47:08
Los Angeles, they had an operation, I00:47:10
went to see her at the hospital, I00:47:14
say there is pain, she says yes, no,00:47:16
I have a pain relief button, a00:47:19
pain relief button, you don’t even need to call00:47:21
this nanny with your00:47:22
face on the floor polisher it looks like with dirty00:47:24
syringes, which means we will overtake America even00:47:27
if it waits for us, this is completely00:47:31
impossible, and here it means a psychic, when00:47:34
they found out that I began to earn good money,00:47:35
they began to say that I am hopelessly ill,00:47:37
everyone without exception, I have a spine of salts,00:47:40
immediately sand in my brain,00:47:43
deaf-mute, I am left of the left ventricle, one00:47:47
completed psychic met me in his00:47:50
apartment he says without looking at00:47:52
me with his hands you know they and the groove and00:47:55
all these he says you have a very difficult00:47:57
case of00:47:58
immediately scaring the games what is he saying00:48:02
keep in mind when you perform there are00:48:04
spectators in the hall who hate you00:48:06
they have jinxed you and an energy tail has grown behind you, a00:48:09
tail, I have00:48:13
a look, then I am therefore facing a column00:48:15
that is inconvenient with a tail and burning like a tail, I00:48:21
also sincerely this is all the tail I have, I am00:48:27
Harry's tail and what are you, what is the00:48:30
essence of what he says to you with energy00:48:33
from outer space through this tail flows into00:48:36
the underworld, this connection with the devil through the00:48:38
skin is a00:48:39
conversation between two crazy people, in fact, in00:48:41
principle, I’m passionate about things with the tail, we will00:48:46
how can I live further through the fact that I00:48:50
can help you cut it off, I need to00:48:52
cut it off, I speak as he speaks, but00:48:55
you a big tail is very difficult for me, it00:48:58
will cost 100 rubles,00:49:00
he put me on the sofa, I think, well, let me00:49:02
chop it off for my money, Lord, I00:49:04
wonder what will happen, he put it on the00:49:07
sofa for a long time, he conjured over the tailbone of the00:49:08
abracadabra, he carried some kind of shinder, some kind of00:49:11
winter paw uniform, then went00:49:14
to another corner you I'll ask the tail is00:49:16
long Almeida is very long I say00:49:21
where do you put the tails chopped off but he's00:49:24
serious he's been taking this seriously for years00:49:26
I told the professor00:49:28
doctor in Texas he looks at me he's on00:49:30
fire you're joking and telling good jokes I00:49:33
'm coming to Moscow I'm going to see him I’ll take00:49:35
him somewhere to chop off something, I00:49:38
did it, I’m crying, but00:49:39
they don’t understand something to tell you00:49:43
don’t understand, it’s impossible to explain abroad00:49:46
that we have Muscovites, and Muscovites are00:49:49
generally important, you should know by yourself,00:49:50
except we are led to any city according to taste00:49:53
for as an American in any city in the00:49:54
world we are the navel of the earth Muscovite the navel of the00:49:57
earth00:49:58
well okay of course we are the navel of the earth but at the00:50:02
same time we ate last00:50:05
last year on September 1 we Muscovites00:50:08
ate the entire circulation of the newspaper evening Moscow00:50:11
is loaded with Alan Chumakov even a newspaper rally00:50:15
is still possible in some city in the00:50:18
world so that people eat newspapers, you laugh and then00:50:21
letters pour in with something to wash down or write,00:50:26
determine exactly what article the00:50:28
Chumak loaded editorials or about the weather, but that it’s00:50:30
difficult to eat the entire newspaper, a reminder even though it’s00:50:33
fresh,00:50:34
and where else in what country was it possible00:50:38
to on the radio on the radio they broadcast a minute of00:50:41
silence charged with us Chumakov you00:50:44
habits and on the radio people recorded a minute of00:50:46
silence of the service on a tape recorder00:50:51
so that later they could make it louder due to the fact00:50:56
that recently the fate of famous personalities in the press has been constantly00:50:58
reconsidering their00:51:00
attitude to historical00:51:01
events and it is proposed to reconsider the00:51:03
geography of the country and to restore the old00:51:06
concept, namely, Ukraine, to separate out00:51:09
independent states, and in order to00:51:10
give Ukraine the final00:51:12
pleasure of releasing a globe of Ukraine, separate from all00:51:14
countries, are00:51:17
you still laughing? There are cities in00:51:19
which it would not be acceptable to agree at all, let us00:51:21
buy the Tatars,00:51:30
give the Tatars the Tatar Strait,00:51:37
and to restore the centuries-old00:51:39
concept of the Tatars - the Mongols00:51:41
give it to him than Angola00:51:45
Carminha annex Nagorno-Karabakh as well as the00:51:47
Armenian lane in the city of Moscow00:51:50
since 26 Latvians live near00:51:56
Khabarovsk all hunters in the Far00:51:58
East are called Latvian maybe not00:52:02
very well he says you’ll be kidding yourself00:52:04
Georgia Azerbaijan annex all the00:52:07
markets in all cities of the Soviet Union00:52:14
but on Nikes to provide you with the00:52:19
same bottom and place ok Birobidzhan to00:52:25
annex Israel and the Union of Soviet00:52:27
Composers, finally Chukotka00:52:34
to annex Japan for the development of the Japanese00:52:36
sense of humor00:52:37
and also since they have a historically00:52:42
identical shape of eyes00:52:45
and all this together with Japan to reunite with00:52:48
Russia because in Russia also, from morning00:52:50
to evening, everyone dreams of being oblique, these00:52:55
demands we put forward for consideration by the00:52:57
Supreme Council, the Supreme Council itself,00:52:58
we demand to annex Central Asia into00:53:01
the leg, Central Asia has long been in need of00:53:03
establishing Soviet power,00:53:08
only 2 nationalities are not offended,00:53:11
only Russians are not offended, their braids are braids and00:53:15
even go well program for action00:53:17
seems like it’s normal Russian to come out, that the00:53:19
main thing is that it’s fun and you know who is00:53:23
not offended yet, don’t run from the Chukchi,00:53:27
by the way, they turned out to be very smart people, we all00:53:30
laughed, they wrote a joke, they were the00:53:32
only ones who understood how smartly to fight00:53:33
against Great Russian chauvinism,00:53:35
but I don’t know what they’re talking about us Russian00:53:37
jokes are written in Chukotka, wow, they00:53:40
also cover themselves and are00:53:41
very witty. From the jokes00:53:44
you can judge the development of the nationality. Judge for00:53:47
yourself, the Chukchi sits on the shore of the00:53:49
Bering Strait, emerges with an American00:53:51
submarine, asks where the Russians are in00:53:52
two sips, the Chukchi are burning, conditionally,00:53:54
the north-west, the Russian Americans00:53:57
dived, let's go behind the Russian at that time she was00:53:58
sleeping and a coward to the basement a boat from the past00:54:00
day of the Rican sip the Chukchi are talking about00:54:02
as if the north-west00:54:03
the Russians are saying don’t split your hair00:54:05
show in00:54:08
Russian the guests are packing up we00:54:11
need to separate and stay with the Chukchi00:54:15
[music]00:54:23
sandals00:54:25
came00:54:27
drink and I wheeze00:54:30
Vasily in time00:54:37
the morning is wiser00:54:41
but in the morning00:54:44
everything is not the same no fun00:54:51
I either smoke and00:54:53
on an empty stomach or drink with a hangover yes and00:55:01
yes and again yes many many many00:55:06
many times yes and00:55:14
many, many times00:55:18
kamoka00:55:20
green counted00:55:24
napkins fight00:55:27
for the beggars and jesters00:55:31
you will be like birds look00:55:35
in the church stench00:55:38
twilight00:55:39
[music]00:55:41
I’m running in a row of00:55:43
harmony00:55:44
and for me00:55:45
and in the church00:55:47
[music] the00:55:50
guys00:55:51
as they need00:55:53
yes or the00:55:54
mountain yes and00:55:57
hiro dai00:55:59
many, many more on00:56:02
[music]00:56:03
be it else once00:56:08
unica00:56:10
I did00:56:13
[music]00:56:14
helped so that things would be00:56:19
solved and00:56:21
on the mountain and00:56:25
in the important area00:56:29
I have [music]00:56:32
jem00:56:35
this is not a joy00:56:39
and you are doing it with him and still00:56:43
everything is not as it should be00:56:46
and00:56:47
I’m glad and the whole rand so that00:56:52
oh00:56:53
she’s [ __ ]00:56:55
in many ways00:56:57
give me more kindness00:57:01
to me dear TV viewers you see00:57:10
another landmark of the city of Moscow00:57:12
gas line heaped McDonald’s I think00:57:15
that if some sculpture00:57:18
wanted to capture the image of our00:57:20
time he would have to00:57:23
sculpt of course this line must00:57:27
also confess that only after visiting the00:57:29
West I found out that00:57:32
McDonald's eateries all over the world exist00:57:35
so that there would be no queues, the head of the00:57:39
McDonald's company says, now he is in great00:57:41
confusion, he wanted to open a00:57:43
McDonald's eatery in Moscow so that there would00:57:45
be no queues in Moscow either, now he is00:57:49
even on the verge of insanity00:57:51
because his dreams have failed collapse, I00:57:55
think that after all, our people have a00:57:57
great mission,00:57:59
we are the origin of coordinates both on the x-axis and don’t00:58:02
give a damn delat she’s mom00:58:07
you are far away00:58:09
traces of darkness there is no god and volume00:58:14
1 of00:58:16
Basilica II00:58:19
was given00:58:20
yeah00:58:22
yes I’m for the sake of00:58:26
but also00:58:28
the pope of the world00:58:31
I somehow00:58:34
give me my legs00:58:35
[music]00:58:40
this is for her I have00:58:42
yellow so00:58:46
although there is a blue00:58:47
lab00:58:49
along the road00:58:50
[music]00:58:55
I will give it to00:58:57
me for a gift00:59:01
abac there is00:59:03
nothing 900:59:07
guys00:59:09
dalida00:59:13
what a00:59:16
evening before there is I'm glad00:59:20
yes and everything for us in many ways00:59:23
but in many ways but the city is melting00:59:26
[ music] I00:59:32
must admit that the more I00:59:35
try to understand something, the more I don’t00:59:36
understand the truth, for example, I don’t00:59:39
understand who we are always00:59:40
mistaken for, you go into the elevator and there are00:59:43
rules for using the elevator, I00:59:45
really don’t understand, so what is the00:59:47
mental development of the person00:59:50
who when entering the elevator, before pressing the00:59:54
button, you will read the rules for00:59:59
using the elevator, have01:00:00
you ever read them, I understand,01:00:03
read them when you got stuck, I understand01:00:05
then read the note below, it is forbidden01:00:08
to use a faulty elevator, how01:00:10
can I and use it, what should I do in it,01:00:12
I don’t understand I don’t know, maybe01:00:14
I’m the only one who doesn’t understand or but I, for example,01:00:16
don’t understand why the proverb money doesn’t buy01:00:18
happiness, only we have it, maybe we need to01:00:22
say correctly not in ours doesn’t like01:00:26
happiness01:00:27
the name of ours I don’t understand if one01:00:30
district of the city is called Soviet then all the01:00:32
rest anti-Soviet, what01:00:36
if there is another district in the01:00:37
partisan city, it’s better not to go there at night,01:00:40
I don’t understand what01:00:44
the name “wings of the soviets” means, it’s true and01:00:47
let’s not let it be like the soviets can have wings, I01:00:52
understand that someone born to crawl cannot fly,01:00:59
I don’t understand why the plant is called not01:01:03
just rich, but certainly a red01:01:06
hero, yes, I don’t understand why the red hero is01:01:10
he drunk, and why did the01:01:12
red seamstress blush with shame01:01:18
for her products and thanks for the years of red dinner,01:01:22
but sometimes I don’t understand something that is01:01:27
generally better to talk about in a whisper, despite01:01:29
the publicity, it’s true but I mean01:01:32
what does this motto mean, the proletarians of all01:01:36
countries01:01:39
if there are proletarians only in ours01:01:42
and they can unite only under Frank01:01:49
or with the proletarian me01:01:52
I don’t understand at all what the01:01:54
word proletarian itself means, it’s that a person who01:01:58
flies past all the time I do01:02:03
n’t understand a lot, I don’t I understand we were01:02:07
all taught at school that communism is when there is no01:02:11
money and there is a lot of goods,01:02:15
what have we built?01:02:20
I just can’t understand how you can01:02:29
fight the communist party under01:02:32
its sleeves01:02:33
[music]01:02:38
and even under the slogan more socialism,01:02:41
how even more01:02:49
I really don’t By the way, I don’t understand many of our01:02:52
slogans. I01:02:54
couldn’t even understand this slogan since childhood and I do01:02:56
n’t understand it now. I just don’t understand01:02:59
communism. This is Soviet power plus01:03:04
electrification of the entire country. No, I really do01:03:10
n’t understand what it means to01:03:12
turn off the lights under communism. this is the01:03:16
darkness that will be the Soviet government and01:03:22
I don’t understand many of our new slogans either, I do01:03:25
n’t understand what this new slogan means,01:03:27
let’s turn the economy around to face the person01:03:33
earlier, where do I stand when I01:03:38
watch TV, I don’t understand anything, I01:03:41
don’t understand, for example, the sessions of the Supreme01:03:43
Council and then that they specially created such a thing01:03:48
in life, well, to entertain the tilde of the shores,01:03:51
they used to wait for months for laughter around, and01:03:54
now any day it comes, it will work and01:03:57
it will catch on. By the way, I don’t understand,01:04:00
some deputies, you know, don’t01:04:03
say it or not, we are with you at the01:04:05
beginning of the path of building socialism01:04:10
again at the beginning01:04:13
no, it’s true I don’t understand many of their01:04:15
expressions, I don’t understand what it means or my01:04:17
favorite expression, we won’t give up01:04:19
our conquests, I don’t understand what kind of01:04:22
conquests we are talking about, I still don’t understand01:04:25
who we don’t have, a [ __ ] who is against them,01:04:32
and I certainly don’t understand the phrase01:04:38
socialist camp,01:04:42
I understand it like this that a good place for a camp is01:04:45
not at a factory and I don’t understand what it is, it does01:04:51
n’t mean the capitalist world,01:04:54
but we have a socialist camp,01:04:58
but I already understood something, I already01:05:02
understood something, I understood it01:05:11
before, I didn’t understand it, I thought who was responsible01:05:13
for everything turns out to be a coach, but I01:05:18
still can’t understand something, I recently01:05:20
read this in the newspaper and didn’t understand, but01:05:23
I said it in a whisper so that only01:05:26
those who don’t understand could hear it, but I read the truth01:05:29
in the tape and didn’t understand, I didn’t understand01:05:36
why they repaired01:05:44
[ applause]01:05:49
[music]01:06:00
[applause]01:06:16
[applause] [music]01:06:24
in no country in the world there are such01:06:26
sights as our honor boards,01:06:29
we just interviewed low01:06:31
passers-by, they all answered that these are01:06:34
portraits of those people who are in their area,01:06:37
who work, well Well, I congratulate01:06:40
all the residents of the area01:06:41
who live and exist wonderfully,01:06:44
despite the fact that only these comrades in the01:06:46
area work well, even like01:06:58
at work, it’s good outside, it’s raining 801:07:01
slush, but at work it’s warm, dry, cozy,01:07:04
I want to work, but I just want to have a01:07:08
strong drink first. annealed for merge01:07:10
how much at work good01:07:13
rosali you please pour me01:07:15
a cup by the way yesterday on TV01:07:16
we watched the news another01:07:18
trade worker was imprisoned had a dacha with a swimming pool01:07:21
tennis courts three peacocks and a01:07:23
kangaroo who hid the states in a bag for a01:07:24
million minutes that I only01:07:29
answered the phone call yes this01:07:31
department no they didn’t wake up01:07:34
that’s what our department is called just a minute I’m01:07:36
asking now I don’t know I’m talking about for a la01:07:40
listen and no one here knows from the01:07:42
specialists there is no one only the01:07:43
Komsomol organizer is right he Rosa Lvovna pour another01:07:47
cup otherwise this is a phone call from01:07:49
me at work fortune knocked out01:07:51
a million, can you imagine01:07:52
and here you are spinning around all day01:07:54
for 140 months reflected 110 to two children01:07:57
as a result we barely save enough for a book01:07:59
every month we save 3 hundred Olonets01:08:03
Selezneva there is no way where the department store for01:08:05
the boys is simple when I left and it01:08:08
happened like that for a week or two no no I know when he01:08:10
’ll come back to try to call the beginning of01:08:12
winter,01:08:13
that it’s already winter, look at my brother’s01:08:18
conversations, they didn’t notice how Simmons01:08:19
I love winter when I look at 1 with him, it’s01:08:22
creepy to work, I’ll01:08:24
just go, I’ll take a smoke break, wean myself, I’m01:08:26
fastening my head, I can’t understand anything, a01:08:28
strange state of work, I want to01:08:30
think not against energy I01:08:32
turned out to be a good leader,01:08:34
guys, you all smoke, and who01:08:36
saw football on TV yesterday, our fellows do01:08:38
n’t know how to play and don’t let others,01:08:40
and they read in the newspapers what outrageous things are01:08:44
happening in connection with the implementation of the01:08:45
alcohol law, well, what are you saying, the number of01:08:48
divorces in the country has increased twice01:08:51
as why half of the men and their wives01:08:53
looked at it with sober eyes for the first time and well01:09:00
okay okay okay this is a joke01:09:02
seriously hands often at the dacha I01:09:04
want to work I just got up to the rim I’ll look otherwise01:09:06
my head on an empty stomach doesn’t01:09:07
understand anything wow what the hell is the queue and01:09:10
what are you you're doing a great job, that you're very01:09:12
busy with me, that you're not Nastya, you don't know me,01:09:14
especially well done, a stranger01:09:15
has taken the line, comrades, that you're making noise, who is skipping the01:09:18
line, I just need tea, I'm01:09:20
on an insurance diet, I grew up today at01:09:22
the distribution, give me an egg, cheese, pate, to start,01:09:24
beets, peas, straight sausage01:09:26
this is for a snack now let me eat01:09:28
comrades what are you making noise that I01:09:31
promised to take tea to heaven far away tea01:09:33
no without sugar instead of sugar God forbid01:09:36
straight from the cabin this is the dish01:09:39
that I mean in the menu called01:09:42
this fried that is a typo not this not a01:09:47
typo all right, sadness, let's see01:09:49
which two,01:09:51
and then there's the right type of fuel,01:09:57
all the comrades are leaving, leaving, leaving, and Boris01:10:00
the lawyer is growing up, quickly come here, I've flooded your01:10:03
line that you're not alone with the department of01:10:08
14 people, let's go, idle 14 hall, go, go,01:10:11
come, come here and don’t01:10:14
embarrass us, otherwise we’ll stand in this through01:10:16
all of ours will come, it’s already come,01:10:18
I think he’s so hungry and takes it, move01:10:21
the plates, there’s nowhere to put them and01:10:22
say thank you that I’m on a diet today, I01:10:24
can’t eat anything except meat flour01:10:26
lactic acid salty solid01:10:28
and liquid01:10:29
to a new diet Russian is called01:10:33
according to this go eat the world according to01:10:37
this diet you need to eat once a day from01:10:39
morning to evening oh well let's go I've eaten it's01:10:44
time to get to work just once again I'll go to01:10:46
kurna then my head on a full stomach01:10:48
doesn't understand anything but what do men smoke all the time and01:10:51
how our boss killed a boar in the last case, we01:10:53
heard01:10:54
that the shot didn’t hit the boar, it’s not yours in the01:10:56
budget, the boar bent the wool, scared, the01:10:58
tree climbed, the knight, remember the goal, the feast with01:11:00
a hook weighs the court, Dima broke in, he fell01:11:02
right on the boar and killed it immediately on the spot, he did01:11:07
n’t even have time to grunt01:11:09
no, the farrier didn’t have time to grunt01:11:12
hf I had time and now excuse me guys, I01:11:16
have to get to work, just for air for a01:11:18
second I took a smoke break for payments, my whole head01:11:19
doesn’t understand anything, oh my god, why is it01:11:23
good on the street the leaves have bloomed, summer, the01:11:25
drake dodged, well, when did01:11:28
the sandals become very sad, only01:11:30
size 38 you got it at 33,01:11:32
well, don’t be angry with the woolen sock in the winter,01:11:34
just now let’s go quickly to the department from01:11:38
the vacation, we missed it, but why did Rosa Lvovna01:11:41
drink all the tea?01:11:47
as Xiangnan read the resolution from above, I01:11:50
approved,01:11:53
well, it’s time to go on vacation,01:11:55
here’s the job, you’re spinning all day long, you’ll01:11:58
look back and it’s not clear01:12:00
what you’ve done in a year, one thing is clear very01:12:02
quickly at such a job, life flies by,01:12:05
maybe that’s acceleration01:12:08
[applause]01:12:17
[music]01:12:27
Nikolai Vasilyevich Gogol01:12:30
has the feeling that this monument is in01:12:32
exile in one of those quiet01:12:37
Moscow courtyards, someone01:12:40
didn’t like this monument and so it was01:12:41
moved here, people pass by and don’t01:12:44
know anything about this monument,01:12:47
now when we start filming only01:12:49
people gather, it doesn’t interest them01:12:51
Gogol that we are removing of course01:12:54
the monument is more unexpected look he is not01:12:58
pompous Gogol is not proud he does not01:13:00
point out to us that we are wrong not with his left hand01:13:02
where we are going the load well look not how sadly01:13:07
he looks he seems to be disappointed in his01:13:11
writing work01:13:12
he seems to understand nothing01:13:14
changes anyway from the fact that he ridiculed something,01:13:17
struggled with some kind of shortcoming, little has01:13:20
changed in Russia, to this day, in the01:13:24
last century, Gogol wrote in Russia01:13:27
there are two troubles and roads and fools,01:13:29
the feeling that he wrote and a direct forecast01:13:31
in general, it seems to me that our classics are01:13:33
surprisingly modern quarantine in the01:13:35
last century, for example, they asked how you01:13:37
would characterize the situation in Russia01:13:39
in one word, he answered steal and01:13:42
Saltykov-Shchedrin01:13:43
again emphasized the last century01:13:46
wrote for our ruble and now they are not01:13:49
giving anything and soon they will punch you in the face and how01:13:51
modern is the decree of Peter the Great01:13:53
and one of the first decrees of the boyars in their01:13:57
minds to speak according to what is not written so that01:14:00
everyone’s stupidity01:14:04
can be seen, maybe that’s why Gogol is so sad01:14:09
[music]01:14:15
when you walk down the street in America, all the people are01:14:18
smiling, everyone is happy, it’s01:14:21
not their custom to live happily,01:14:24
the feeling that they don’t know that they are rotting,01:14:27
I decided treat me to lunch sure01:14:30
invited to lunch a very rich01:14:32
American businessman now past01:14:35
captain of the KVN team of the city of Riga Yury01:14:36
Radzievsky he once headed a club of01:14:39
cheerful and resourceful people now he showed01:14:41
resourcefulness he left the Soviet Union01:14:43
he remained cheerful he left telling me the01:14:46
last phrase life is given to a person01:14:47
once this is in the Soviet Union union, I01:14:49
won’t survive this, there really remained01:14:52
some kind of joy of a person every day and01:14:55
he invited me to lunch we are a very01:14:58
expensive restaurant 107 floor skyscrapers01:15:00
night01:15:01
lunch Americans late downstairs in the night down there01:15:04
just in the depths of Manhattan but you01:15:06
know the waiter brings hot and we eat01:15:10
cold appetizers01:15:11
and there is hot food on the baking sheet, a luxurious01:15:14
smell of some kind comes out from under the lid and01:15:17
for the sake of a friend, he says something in his ear to the01:15:20
waiter, he, embarrassed, turns around01:15:22
and leaves with the hot food back in the kitchen,01:15:23
I’ll ask Yuri, Yura said something,01:15:26
why the waiter was embarrassed, Yuri left,01:15:29
what? told him told him that he brought it early01:15:33
[music]01:15:36
game what did you say, well, he01:15:40
brought it early again, of course it’s early, we didn’t01:15:43
run out of cold, it brings bitterness,01:15:45
it’s unethical towards us Egrul, I beg you,01:15:48
come to Moscow, tell01:15:51
the waiter there that he brought it early I want01:15:55
you to be shocked too, and01:15:59
purely physically, they serve cognac in01:16:04
glasses like this in this restaurant in01:16:07
huge glasses, I say again, not01:16:09
for this, not for Soviet people in general, here01:16:11
in huge glasses, but pour it a01:16:13
little wide, the vigor of the glass01:16:15
allows you to feel01:16:17
the aroma ancient conica and pours01:16:19
one drink at the bottom is called that is,01:16:23
drink nous de 2 Grinko feel the aroma of01:16:27
cognac is understandable not for our people, and01:16:30
they also introduced rules there that01:16:33
were definitely not designed for the increased01:16:37
flow of Soviet tourists to America due to perestroika, that01:16:40
is, through every 2 drinks and I brought you the third01:16:42
award for free, well, this01:16:46
rule cannot be extended to ours,01:16:48
you know, when the waiter ran to the01:16:51
kitchen for a free twentieth for us01:16:53
drink am,01:16:55
he returned, lathered, and asked where we were from, I01:16:58
say from Russia, he ran to the kitchen,01:17:00
returned with a bottle, and said here’s a drink01:17:02
these01:17:03
and nothing to drive me back and forth all the01:17:06
time I still have work, again01:17:11
you know for the Americans what I say is01:17:13
normal, but ours can come to the restaurant01:17:16
and tells me the first two drinks & nela01:17:18
Dmitry01:17:20
about ours it turned out to be such a consideration01:17:24
that they weren’t no01:17:27
American rules are calculated and civilized01:17:28
people pour wine, for example, into a glass01:17:31
for you to try,01:17:32
they have no right to pour it in sparring until01:17:35
you try, that is, imagine01:17:37
pouring expensive Burgundy, you know,01:17:41
try, try, finish the item01:17:48
sourly,01:17:49
only ours laughs, for any01:17:52
foreigner this is normal, but ours wants01:17:54
why because ours immediately understands,01:17:56
she can move from restaurant to restaurant,01:17:59
she says sour iq evening, it will be sour01:18:04
a person who has been burned by the Soviet regime01:18:07
can cheat any government in the world, this is what01:18:11
the Americans understood with the arrival of Soviet immigrants in their country,01:18:14
they all shouted,01:18:17
let the dissidents come to us, we01:18:20
let them go, but no one I didn’t know that they were01:18:21
so dissident with me, sitting at the01:18:24
table with us, Grant sets fire to the bay01:18:27
leaf, lowers the vodka01:18:29
game, why and says I’m driving so that it doesn’t01:18:30
smell,01:18:33
it will never come to mind for a stupid01:18:36
American, ours, at least the little things should01:18:40
be eaten up, so to speak, in general, ours formed whole ones there districts01:18:43
migrants Russian district of Brighton Beach01:18:45
in general here they were all Jews but there we call01:18:48
them Russian winds are called01:18:50
Russian there Villy Tokareva sings in01:18:52
the restaurant Shifutinsky Gulko Uspenskaya01:18:54
because this restaurant this area01:18:57
generally flourished with restaurants it was such a01:19:00
poor area lived a decent beggar01:19:05
our blacks survived in general, it is known from history01:19:08
that when blacks came somewhere,01:19:10
all nationalities left from there, this is the01:19:12
first time in life when01:19:14
blacks fled from somewhere01:19:16
after Russia came there and the areas01:19:23
blossomed with restaurants, Yasha's sons Urim and01:19:28
Odessa Tashkent Russia and fun, a01:19:33
feeling of happiness that they left01:19:35
the Soviet Union is enough for them for the01:19:37
rest of their lives01:19:38
they have fun every day ours since01:19:41
the year you are all every day the last tomorrow01:19:45
back the Soviet Union to return01:19:47
so rich Yalta with Odessa01:19:51
temperament and Kharkov taste01:19:53
and they don’t even learn our English01:19:56
Muggles and it seems like not and not in As soon as01:20:00
America arrived, Aunt Frida came here to them,01:20:03
someone from Kharkov comes01:20:05
with me to an American store01:20:07
not far from bright, she says01:20:09
what are01:20:10
we here for six years, Americans don’t01:20:12
speak Russian, arrogant American police officers01:20:18
in the Russian region are learning Russian, the01:20:22
FBI was created department for studying what01:20:25
is going on in the Russian region because the01:20:29
largest number of denunciations in01:20:31
America comes from the Russian region,01:20:33
our chromosome set cannot help but blame our01:20:35
comrade, this is heredity, nothing01:20:38
can be done about it, because01:20:41
my friend called me from prison, for example.01:20:43
issued counterfeit dollars to the01:20:45
Americans, firstly, how many of01:20:48
ours issued counterfeit dollars in two01:20:50
days, and secondly, how will they do it? ours, having01:20:53
arrived, immediately realized and issued01:20:55
counterfeit dollars on a photocopier01:20:59
in some cities, when I speak, he does01:21:02
n’t even react because he doesn’t know01:21:03
what a photocopier is here and in America01:21:06
there is a multi-color copier, everything01:21:08
down to the smallest veins of our01:21:10
Americans thought it was necessary to work01:21:13
on all trades in order to receive a salary01:21:14
some kind of machine immediately money 500 and the01:21:18
Americans think that they have dealt with the problem of01:21:20
theft magnetic stripes on the01:21:23
price tag are applied if you pass from a01:21:25
crow of some kind - then a magnetic strip thing01:21:28
rings at the door, a policeman will stop you,01:21:30
but if you go to pay01:21:33
with a probe, the computers remove01:21:35
the magnetization of a few stripes and01:21:37
at the same time the price is sent to the cash register,01:21:40
all this way you pass quietly,01:21:42
nothing rings, you can’t demagnetize it yourself,01:21:45
you can’t demagnetize the code, you need to know the headphones of the institute01:21:48
were working on a solution to this01:21:52
you know, our problems are being torn off and carried and all of01:22:00
us will not defeat Einar, we cannot be01:22:04
defeated by the Americans will never01:22:06
fight with us, they understand that we01:22:08
will tear something away from the rocket, I01:22:12
finally realized that we are an invincible01:22:14
people when I saw our people buying01:22:17
bananas in stores, but still one case is01:22:20
also indicative from the point of view of our01:22:23
thinking, the01:22:24
Americans were forced in the Russian01:22:27
region to replace new pay phones01:22:29
with an old one, they developed a new type of pay01:22:32
phones, it will be uncomfortable01:22:34
to talk on a pay phone if you01:22:35
flip a coin01:22:37
during the conversation,01:22:38
the conversation may be interrupted you will in01:22:41
tension, so01:22:42
put down the boss 4 and talk and01:22:45
as long as you want you can really01:22:46
talk 78 30 minutes but when you01:22:49
talk you have to hang up the phone01:22:52
will ring,01:22:55
you pick up the phone it will tell you how much longer you01:22:57
have to put down01:23:01
ours are sitting01:23:05
right now01:23:06
[music]01:23:10
they found fools01:23:13
okay you ours just left not ours, but the fact01:23:16
that he was burned should experience a01:23:19
feeling of deep satisfaction let’s01:23:21
inherit purely then he takes off the01:23:24
liters he says he went to the erased mother and01:23:26
only after that he runs away with a feeling of01:23:28
deep satisfaction01:23:31
the Americans cork poured the day when01:23:34
they invited our dissidents01:23:36
by the way, but I realized that we are01:23:39
invincible people when I saw it, I01:23:41
finally made this conclusion for01:23:43
myself after I saw how our people01:23:45
buy bananas from the store,01:23:47
talking scales, you put, say,01:23:51
two bunches of bananas in plastic bags, you01:23:53
put your finger Elena package on the01:23:56
scales, the scales tell you how much you have to01:23:58
do from here Chuck gets out, paste the01:24:02
check over plastic bags and go to the01:24:03
cash register where they charge you according to the price01:24:05
indicated on the check01:24:09
no, our bananas are put in a01:24:12
bag that collects dust on the veins and they even put Polina Victory on the scales01:24:14
and since this is all being watched by01:24:15
television cameras, but they put it down01:24:18
and lift it up bananas stupid01:24:23
American scales01:24:26
dell curtains of a divided package01:24:32
and only the same stupid American dice01:24:36
can’t understand how for such a bunch of01:24:38
4 cents you, on the other hand, all these01:24:44
rules, this rule is the basis of our shame01:24:48
abroad, I have never been as01:24:50
disgraced anywhere as abroad in general I’m embarrassed to01:24:52
even tell you, but we’re all idiots,01:24:54
so there’s nothing wrong with it,01:24:57
for example, I decided in Italy to eat lobster01:25:02
with lobster, well, I think01:25:04
read that I lobster amaretto pmpk01:25:06
perestroika has not ended and so I’m in the01:25:08
mood, I think now the waiter will come,01:25:11
I’ll say lobster, he’s coming lobster, but01:25:14
what else? here I was not ready, the rage01:25:16
inhibits the compote like that, but I realized that the01:25:20
first sit in my life who ordered the01:25:23
compote after lobster, he sees and the compote is01:25:28
wrong and piled up the com-port, I said, as01:25:32
if this is a hobby, I have01:25:34
the comfort of drinking every day after lobster happened in01:25:36
life he brought not lobsters first in the01:25:39
aquarium they say which one to choose he01:25:42
imagine if they bring you a cow to a01:25:44
restaurant where to cut the steak from well I’m01:25:47
burning for this for me this is every day01:25:50
before the compote so01:25:52
he brought me this lobster with01:25:57
lobster tongs if I knew I I wouldn’t have ordered01:26:00
eat with tongs01:26:02
prick or rather you need to know how along where01:26:05
across and what kind of lobster what kind of tongs I use a01:26:08
fork and a knife to chicken, that is, I don’t know how at the01:26:12
embassy the reception was at the station chuh chuh chuh01:26:14
chug chug and the skeletons are only from01:26:16
chickens and I only plucked the hairs01:26:26
unshaven chicken so Soviet I01:26:30
splashed the floor of the restaurant with this lobster and pooped01:26:33
lava01:26:34
from me people sat down I myself arah01:26:37
he he explodes turns out to be to the more01:26:40
I was the epicenter of the arn of their splashes was just and01:26:43
suddenly the waiter brings me a bowl this is an01:26:46
accounting liquid compote of some kind01:26:49
for Russians, a diluted peach floats01:26:52
one olive to and a slice of lemon and well, I01:26:55
think they won’t raise a scandal and well, he01:26:58
sucked this thing out hahaha this is a liquid01:27:04
for washing hands after ha-ha-ha what did you01:27:11
think there’s a peach floating there01:27:14
can a peach float with liquid for washing01:27:17
rum I will die I will remember the faces of the01:27:23
people in this restaurant01:27:27
you know how ashamed I was I was not01:27:30
so ashamed that I left without paying01:27:32
at all no it’s funny to be honest and sad01:27:44
to see how in modern films,01:27:45
again,01:27:47
shot more by publicists than by01:27:49
journalists, young people they complain that they have01:27:52
nothing to do because there are so01:27:54
many libraries, so much01:27:56
wonderful literature01:27:59
in which you can live, good literature01:28:02
invites you to visit, our01:28:04
section is called engagement, that is, an01:28:05
invitation to the audience to a certain we01:28:11
mean good mood, not01:28:12
necessarily satire, not necessarily01:28:14
humor01:28:15
some new thoughts interesting to the viewer01:28:19
invitation engagement also good01:28:21
literature she invites you to visit her01:28:23
in the novels of Turgenev Tolstoy you can live01:28:26
in the novels of Chekhov you01:28:28
can not only live but also put down01:28:34
the book to dream that the next day you01:28:36
will return to this house in this family01:28:39
which water rings01:28:41
I don’t like these modern films01:28:44
that justify young people saying they have01:28:47
nothing to do when people don’t know who the01:28:49
famous words belong to, they usually01:28:52
speak as someone from the ancients said, so this is how01:28:54
someone from the ancients said, every01:28:57
nation has the government that it01:28:59
deserves, we We brag about the Russian terminals that01:29:02
we have been buying in Canada for over twenty years,01:29:04
despite idleness, most of us01:29:07
walk around with dirty hands, we dance at01:29:10
funerals and cry at weddings, we go into battle for the one01:29:13
who shoots us, we immediately eat01:29:16
pasta and potatoes after pancakes with01:29:18
sour cream and eat it all up buns with01:29:20
jam, we know painting from candy wrappers01:29:23
and literature from cinema and are perplexed01:29:26
why Vronsky is reading01:29:28
Malaya Zemlya on TV in a Bolshevik factory costume,01:29:29
we insult each other with01:29:33
the word intelligent and the expression painfully01:29:35
smart,01:29:38
we found glasnost as an opportunity to01:29:42
approach the boss and say that he is an01:29:43
[ __ ],01:29:45
yes We have glasnost, you are a goat, we01:29:49
simultaneously overtook all the countries of the world in01:29:52
three years, couples whale of prostitution,01:29:53
democracy, we will soon have prison directors01:29:56
elected by prisoners at a general01:29:58
meeting by secret ballot, and from01:30:00
our midst we do not even fill the01:30:04
chamber hall and for the sake of Mozart Chopin01:30:07
Beethoven and Vivaldi Richter and at the same time, it’s a01:30:10
new day for them with stadiums to once again01:30:12
listen to the gentle May or the blue fog01:30:16
doesn’t look like deception or circles with us 101:30:18
break you up with me me with you or don’t01:30:20
pour salt on my wounds,01:30:22
or better yet, wouldn’t you put some tea on my back, we01:30:28
ourselves We write words to ourselves everywhere, in no01:30:33
country in the world will you see, let’s say in France,01:30:35
so that the01:30:38
glory of the great French people spreads along the Champs Elysees through the01:30:40
builder of capitalism,01:30:42
it’s the same as at home, each of01:30:45
us hangs a slogan right in the hallway,01:30:47
not and in parentheses attribute it to a01:30:50
loved one01:30:52
and sit drink under it and why else01:30:59
work when and so the words01:31:01
we are leaving the cinemas from films or01:31:04
not Forman Coppola from the greatest films01:31:08
in Bertolucci and at the same time,01:31:11
funds have finally been raised all over the country to repeat on01:31:15
television the film Slave Isaura we01:31:24
have gotten so used to this film01:31:27
that they01:31:33
seriously began to call their garden plots fazenda me01:31:38
good fazenda 6 acres01:31:42
two days three logs to the toilet trailers01:31:46
yes the slave Izaura01:31:48
would hang herself on your land right in the01:31:52
trailer most of us, by01:32:00
the way, still do not distinguish between a cello01:32:03
and a double bass and01:32:05
confuse the oboe with the gibbons of Rembrandt with01:32:09
Ribbentrop Babilis and Schnobel01:32:14
and Sarah Bernard St. Bernards01:32:17
we were all interested in Pugacheva's gifts for a year01:32:21
swore01:32:24
if she swore then write with what words01:32:27
how hold it connected and nothing to blame01:32:30
the deputies they by the way are people's01:32:32
deputies01:32:33
what kind of people are such deputies01:32:42
you noticed in life that just how - strong,01:32:45
smart people01:32:47
can laugh at themselves, which means there01:32:49
is hope, we will survive in the last century, the idols of01:32:52
our fatherland were poets, in part there were01:32:55
questions of honor, in our time I am a psychic sorcerer,01:32:57
hypnotists and we are01:32:59
satirists, God forbid, someday this time01:33:01
will end in Russia and times will come again01:33:03
poets, the only thing that is a pity is that we01:33:05
don’t live to see this time with you, we01:33:08
only need to think, the rest must be01:33:10
completed by our descendants, but since we01:33:14
won’t live to see this time, remember the song01:33:16
helps us build and live01:33:17
your helps us survive, so laugh01:33:19
if you can live like today for a long time,01:33:22
our country has enough stupidity for a long,01:33:26
joyful, wonderful life, but also01:33:29
all the best to you01:33:30
[applause]01:33:42
although I perfectly understand that it is to01:33:47
some extent absurd to hold evenings of01:33:49
humor and satire in our time, I recently drove01:33:52
around Moscow by car by taxi and01:33:56
this picture stuck in my mind, I think there will01:33:59
always be huge queues of kefir for01:34:02
passports,01:34:03
I never in my life thought that I would live01:34:05
to see the time when I would eat kefir strictly01:34:07
at my place of registration, there is nothing bread, it’s01:34:13
hard for people to get01:34:14
eggs, sour cream, what to say is that we are01:34:18
all all we know very well, but the01:34:22
fireworks over Moscow explode with joy, it’s01:34:25
somehow absurdly strange to have fun at this01:34:28
time, and look now at the01:34:30
television program,01:34:31
well, in addition to the01:34:37
rock bands completely choking under their own gaiety, we have01:34:40
either a knights’ competition, or a01:34:43
professional billiards competition, or a01:34:46
mother-daughter competition, or a competition beauties01:34:48
granddaughters bugs will soon be in general all this is01:34:52
a little reminiscent of a feast during the plague and01:34:55
nevertheless it seems to me that the audience01:35:00
wants to meet01:35:02
intelligent,01:35:04
creative people who are interesting as individuals and01:35:07
we invite you, dear viewers, to01:35:12
your new program engagement01:35:17
[music]01:35:26
[applause] [music]01:36:14
[ applause] [music]01:36:39
[applause] [music]Description:
Ангажемент. Михаил Задорнов - Задорнов сидит на лавочке у входа в ГИТИС и рассуждает о сатире и сатириках, о перестройке, о человеческой доброте - Об антиалкогольной кампании, о новом мышлении, о преподавателях КПСС и предлагает весь сегодняшний концерт посвятить "развитому идиотизму" - О том, над чем будут смеяться через 10 лет, о цензуре советского времени - Рассказ об археологах далекого будущего - О реалиях современной жизни, русском языке, профессии сатирика - Задорнов на сцене: "В России беда - уродился урожай" и что такое "Закрома Родины" - Задорнов беседует со студенткой ГИТИСа Инной, студентка произносит скороговорки, затем они беседуют о правильных и неправильных ударениях в словах - Рассказ "Заметки фенолога" и рассказ "Наш человек" о швейцарах в гостинице - Задорнов у памятника М.В.Ломоносову у здания факультета журналистики МГУ рассуждает о русском языке, о бюрократическом языке газет, читает фрагменты поэмы "Евгений Онегин" А.С.Пушкина - Вокзал, у перрона поезд "Москва-Воркута". Задорнов читает рассказ "Два девятых вагона" - Памятник А.С.Пушкину в строительных лесах у кинотеатра "Россия" на улице Горького (ныне Тверской), Задорнов предлагает телезрителям провести полную реставрацию русского языка - О всеобъемлющем человеческом мышлении, о шабаше Кашпировского и Чумака на телевидении - Песня В. Высоцкого, многочисленная очередь в "Макдональдс", среди стоящих Задорнов, он рассуждает об американской закусочной - Рассказ "Я не понимаю…" - О передовиках района - Рассказ "Ускорение" - Задорнов у памятника Гоголю на Никитском бульваре рассуждает о том, почему Н.Гоголь такой печальный - Задорнов вспоминает свой визит в Америку и читает рассказ "Омары и компот" - Задорнов на лавочке у ГИТИСа рассуждает о современных фильмах, об очередях в стране, о конкурсах на ТВ Главная редакция литературно-драматических программ, 1990 г. Режиссер - Юрий Зайцев ▶Подписаться на канал "Советское телевидение": https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCiVZttFkdEwMi3QXpRqFTzQ?sub_confirmation=1 Наши группы в соцсетях: 📌 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/unsupportedbrowser 📌 VK: https://vk.com/teleradiofond 📌 ОK: https://ok.ru/group/54885780750586 Приложение для смартфона "Радио. XX век" 🔗 Google Play: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=ru.gtrf 🔗 App Store: https://apps.apple.com/ru/app/%D1%80%D0%B0%D0%B4%D0%B8%D0%BE-xx-%D0%B2%D0%B5%D0%BA/id1336486169
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How can I download an audio track (music) to MP3 "Ангажемент. Михаил Задорнов (1990)"?
The most convenient way is to use the UDL Client program, which supports converting video to MP3 format. In some cases, MP3 can also be downloaded through the UDL Helper extension.
How can I save a frame from a video "Ангажемент. Михаил Задорнов (1990)"?
This feature is available in the UDL Helper extension. Make sure that "Show the video snapshot button" is checked in the settings. A camera icon should appear in the lower right corner of the player to the left of the "Settings" icon. When you click on it, the current frame from the video will be saved to your computer in JPEG format.
What's the price of all this stuff?
It costs nothing. Our services are absolutely free for all users. There are no PRO subscriptions, no restrictions on the number or maximum length of downloaded videos.