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Video tags
Subtitles
Russian
00:00:01
clinical deaths of an overdose, I00:00:04
took it together with my wife Yes, I woke up,00:00:06
she didn’t As if she were lying dead next to00:00:09
my whole circle Yes, I’m 44 years old There is no00:00:12
one anymore My best friend burned his grandparents there00:00:14
in the house He died, smears it morning00:00:17
and evening so that at least they could move their legs, the00:00:19
girls went to the panel, my acquaintances00:00:23
stole monuments from the cemetery and there one00:00:26
acquaintance killed his mother, as if one acquaintance00:00:28
cut off his penis and sent it to his ex-wife00:00:31
by mail, she had a stroke. Now00:00:35
she has been lying there for six years just like a00:00:38
talking bed00:00:46
on In fact, in principle, I00:00:49
shouldn’t be here at all and be00:00:53
alive because on mine I had00:00:58
three00:00:59
clinical deaths from overdose,00:01:07
and in fact, it’s like some kind of miracle that I’m00:01:09
sitting here in front of you, living and healthy,00:01:28
my story begins in00:01:30
1991 That is, it00:01:34
was very fashionable back then Yes, I was 1300:01:37
years old glue The moment is like this, well, the story is00:01:40
like everyone on the team Yes, and the children were pre-Soviet,00:01:45
that is, they were deprived of any support00:01:47
from the state, and that is, all00:01:50
these circles there disappeared there, Homes for Pioneers and00:01:53
schoolchildren, yes that is, our parents were00:01:55
busy just feeding us.00:01:57
We were chatting, hanging out in00:02:00
the gateways and breathing in this glue00:02:03
moment. This is a nightmare, of course00:02:08
[music]00:02:14
[music]00:02:21
[music] I00:02:26
took mind-altering substances right there and00:02:30
then, well, it’s00:02:32
like this one hit Russia wave of00:02:36
hard drugs I also00:02:39
personally had a very bad company before 200:02:42
there were companies one from the school there were00:02:44
decent boys there 2 such street servants as00:02:47
if they were gopniks who stupidly envied me00:02:49
that my father had a car Yes there in those00:02:52
years Another 80 and the wealth in the family00:02:55
just made me stupidly dragged into this very basement00:02:59
like Come with us Sasha Sasha and went00:03:02
this basement In the ninety-first and essentially00:03:05
yes until 19 He was sitting in this basement00:03:19
This is the basement he is even now the00:03:22
door is open like this like in the00:03:25
ninety-first very year00:03:28
Come in, as they say Well, it’s00:03:32
better not to go there because apparently there are00:03:34
janitors in Tula or someone else there, and00:03:37
there Yes, this is that in the Soviet era, then00:03:40
in the post-Soviet everything was abandoned, and all00:03:42
these basements were laboratories there,00:03:47
they found a lot of all sorts of these then these00:03:51
yellow whatever they call these boxes with00:03:55
these antidotes WoW this with this life safety from the00:03:59
Defense also ate all sorts of pills like00:04:02
Toren and so on all sorts of crap That00:04:04
is, but the children were like that in general I’m 44 and00:04:06
in fact I’m a child at heart Yes, this00:04:09
teenager 15-year-old because these are00:04:13
all anonymous people Yes, we are addicted, at00:04:17
what age I am, or rather Yes, I started00:04:19
using it there and then I stayed00:04:27
during the hole wild pains, crazy00:04:31
diarrhea, gagging,00:04:34
insomnia00:04:39
and that state when you are ready for anything,00:04:43
anything in general, just to get00:04:46
the drug from this pipe on the fifth floor,00:04:50
I almost fell, the00:04:52
fifth floor is my windows, through the pipe00:04:56
I’m on this forest on the roof, that is, this is00:04:58
what I was capable of. Let’s a man00:05:01
in this very madness that through the forest from the00:05:04
window on the roof like this now this is a00:05:08
new pipe, before there was still an old one I00:05:10
almost flew down with this pipe00:05:14
I started using hard drugs for00:05:18
payoff in gardening there Northern00:05:20
Samarka we have been best friends for 20 years00:05:22
[music] it00:05:23
turned out hands Yes he burned my grandfather there00:05:27
grandmother in the house He died00:05:29
The girls with whom I lived also died, like00:05:32
my whole circle Yes, I’m 44 years old There is no00:05:34
one anymore and honestly with whom I started00:05:37
using then they died or from some00:05:41
disease Yes, it’s like this thing there,00:05:44
let’s say hepatitis itself or just an00:05:46
overdose, it all started out fun, everything was00:05:49
interesting, like some kind of game, some kind of00:05:51
farce, it was fashionable, it was00:05:54
interesting, it was the nineties,00:05:58
health was a lot, like a lot of energy,00:06:01
but00:06:03
over time it00:06:06
sucked in so much that I had to just00:06:09
smear it in the morning and evening to at00:06:12
least move their legs the00:06:14
girls went to the panel the00:06:17
boys started stealing as if00:06:20
many ended up in prison and ended00:06:25
their days there, my acquaintances stole monuments00:06:28
from the cemetery and stole from stores and there00:06:32
was a young couple together, they just got00:06:35
married and used it, they died, they00:06:39
lay there for a long time before they were found there’s also a smell00:06:45
there, one friend of mine killed a mother, it’s as if one00:06:48
friend of mine cut off his penis and sent it to his ex-wife00:06:52
by mail, that is, the deaths began00:06:55
somewhere in the year zero and continued00:06:58
literally, that is,00:07:00
these days I still feel like, You know, I’m00:07:06
not at ease when he four years ago in 1800:07:11
I used it with my wife Yes, I00:07:13
woke up she no she was lying dead00:07:15
next to us we were at the dacha00:07:19
and I still blame myself for it Because no00:07:22
matter how much she wanted I wanted to00:07:25
use this state to the enemy you won’t00:07:29
wish00:07:32
[music]00:07:40
my rock bottom was in 1919. That is,00:07:44
when my car was taken away, when00:07:47
I had Well, I was slapped with several00:07:51
criminal cases. When00:07:53
my beloved wife died. Yes, an overdose. That is,00:07:57
I woke up on Dead. That is, I00:07:59
realized that everything as if, that is, there were00:08:02
moments when I00:08:05
also used with friends, I woke up, they were00:08:08
n’t there, they were dead,00:08:11
I have a friend, she lives there00:08:14
in the center, and she was also paralyzed. That is,00:08:17
she got hit, she had a stroke and now00:08:21
she’s been lying there for 6 years now like a talking00:08:24
bed, my best friend would be Victor,00:08:27
who died of AIDS in the twelfth year00:08:32
Because when the diagnosis was made, I00:08:35
started taking drugs against00:08:38
speech no,00:08:41
one fine day he got sick and died00:08:46
[music]00:08:49
only00:08:51
having lost, that is, all my loved ones Yes, there are00:08:54
two wives there, there are friends everyone and for work,00:08:58
all these00:09:00
concomitant diseases which, that00:09:03
is, he cannot00:09:04
earn for himself until the very day, it’s as if my00:09:09
mother gave me a drip there, I don’t know, I don’t remember00:09:12
that 10 there was an IV in you for two months00:09:14
at home on Pionerskaya, I was lying around, that is,00:09:18
I was walking along the wall to the kitchen. I slept an hour a00:09:22
day And somehow I00:09:25
had a bit of sleep and came out here, but this was the00:09:29
first time I went00:09:32
[music]00:09:44
[music]00:09:52
to some theater because00:09:54
[music] they were00:09:56
well dressed with such sparkling eyes,00:09:59
joyfully, that is, What did I do? I00:10:02
took off my dishes, my teeth, and started00:10:05
banging on the table with them, yelling. What kind of00:10:07
drug addicts are you, you’re like, well, you’re all lying, I’m a00:10:10
drug addict, and in the nineteenth already,00:10:12
that is, knowing about others, that is, I00:10:16
came to the group and started going every00:10:19
day, that is, two weeks passed until I00:10:21
believed in myself, well, here at 3000:10:24
Sovetskaya, also in the center,00:10:26
my friend lived there. I took drugs there, I00:10:29
used drugs, yes, I didn’t00:10:32
feel anything, as if the water had been driven away, and00:10:34
that same evening I also went to the group,00:10:36
that is, I realized that it was like00:10:38
this Curse of Narcotics Anonymous, it00:10:40
works, and since then I’ve been clean00:10:43
sober. That is,00:10:44
I stopped00:10:47
using and even quit Cigarettes, there are00:10:50
different groups,00:10:52
I went because, well, in sobriety, that00:10:55
is as if it00:10:57
is being restored Yes, and literally, that is,00:11:01
[the music]00:11:03
sometimes tears you up in your feelings That is, as00:11:06
if you don’t know how to live joy,00:11:08
yes, that is, as if before what I did, that00:11:09
is, I stabbed joy Yes, there00:11:11
was swelling of grief, too, as if yes Well and in00:11:16
sobriety there are definitely people there Yes, definitely00:11:18
sex, definitely food there on shopaholism before00:11:22
the start, anywhere there is00:11:24
someone in workaholism, as it were, before the00:11:26
first step goes I realized that I am powerless, yes, that is,00:11:29
overdependence, the second step I00:11:32
remember that there is some kind of power Yes,00:11:33
unknown to me, which may still somehow00:11:36
return to me there, this is00:11:43
the head, that is, when I entrusted, as it were, to a higher00:11:47
power, the so-called spirit of the Universe, the00:11:50
fourth step is a deep00:11:57
search. This is where all this came from. Yes, there00:12:00
is childhood, let’s say, but these are00:12:02
fears feeling There is a sex relationship that00:12:05
this is what I’m writing, these are these examples Yes,00:12:09
and life there is something from the past, something from the00:12:11
present and, in fact, the 12th step is00:12:13
when I already realized all this, it let me00:12:15
go, now I’m already00:12:18
telling other addicted people00:12:22
so how is it possible at all there is a way out that00:12:24
it really works itself, that is, that00:12:27
this is not a doctor of some kind, yes, this is a fact,00:12:32
any person, let’s say, I’m from a00:12:35
good family Yes, my father was00:12:37
a professor, my mother is a candidate of sciences, I had a00:12:40
house full of things I lived on Nevsky Yes, as00:12:42
if I had everything I wanted Yes, and as00:12:46
if I had this interest in life,00:12:48
such a lively boy. I’m like, even to this00:12:51
day I don’t understand why I started00:12:53
using anything at all, that is, it’s00:12:56
possible as if yes00:12:59
People are divided into There are two categories: some00:13:02
seem to use and the second don’t00:13:05
because they are simply rushing from life to00:13:08
life itself, this is a buzz, this is generally00:13:10
joy, yes That’s because a person was00:13:13
not originally born there with a syringe Yes, in the hands or00:13:17
cigarettes or a glass he is just a person and the00:13:20
current ones are just crazy They are00:13:22
sane, many have such serious00:13:24
speech impediments, as if yes And many went00:13:28
through the madhouse through00:13:31
[music]00:13:33
not the same story as00:13:36
modern drugs, they are00:13:40
literally there in a very short00:13:43
time but they make a Human simply00:13:48
insane Yes, it’s like he’s00:13:50
degenerates himself, if let’s say00:13:53
I lasted more than two00:13:56
decades on my drugs, and of course with remissions, then00:13:59
in six months people are generally just00:14:01
stomach and there is no program as a rule in00:14:04
principle, that is, there is already brain destruction going00:14:07
on. on an00:14:10
organic level, that is, they seem to be00:14:12
healthy young people or, as it were, girls,00:14:15
but inside they are just some kind of00:14:18
pitch-black I, by the way, write poetry myself. I00:14:22
have a poem. That is, I remember the reflection of00:14:24
terrible days, death was breathing in my back00:14:26
when everyone was in a deadly dance, I became friends00:14:30
with ruining my life with heroin and all00:14:33
the dope arriving I said no to myself and00:14:36
I dream about the future so I chose life,00:14:39
as they say there was such a film Trans00:14:41
Putin Dacha for Life00:14:43
[music]00:14:53
then I think this is my calling I really00:14:56
love animals00:14:58
So I want and making it easier their suffering there00:15:06
[music]00:15:09
today I work as a00:15:12
veterinarian, it’s just a miracle for me Yes,00:15:15
just a miracle, yes, that is, as if I left the00:15:18
profession 20 years ago Now I’m back,00:15:21
yes I00:15:22
cured myself This is a disease Yes, it’s like00:15:27
these fatal ones, that is in fact, I00:15:29
should now be dead a long time ago00:15:32
Yes, I’m alive I’m standing in front of you, I’m00:15:35
happy, yes, in fact, that is,00:15:39
Well, that’s the story00:15:41
[music]Description:
Александр родился и вырос в интеллигентной семье в самом центре Петербурга. Дом — полная чаша. Он был живым и любознательным ребенком. Но время 90-х внесло свои коррективы. Что заставило его попробовать наркотики? Как он смог вернуться к нормальной жизни спустя 20 лет, и как удалось найти свое призвание? ✅ Подпишись на канал: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCG7nnvhsL7bsHkrBsTO2KLQ?sub_confirmation=1 @plo66
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