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Comedy Club: Мотивация | Иван Половинкин @ComedyClubRussia

Comedy Club: Мотивация | Иван Половинкин @ComedyClubRussia

Channel: Comedy Club

Comedy Club: Джиган и HammAli & Navai | Гарик Харламов и Павел Воля @ComedyClubRussia

Comedy Club: Джиган и HammAli & Navai | Гарик Харламов и Павел Воля @ComedyClubRussia

Channel: Comedy Club

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Channel: Comedy Club

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[music]

00:00:31

[music]

00:00:37

[applause]

00:00:58

45 degrees

00:01:14

through the courtyards drunk you can get to any part of the city

00:01:17

this there, seven years old, everyone is

00:01:19

driving, everyone is there in the park,

00:01:29

here you have braces, you're a sucker, they're rich, that's

00:01:32

all there, there,

00:01:36

to the airport four days before departure,

00:01:38

we're leaving, it's all there, where there are traffic lights without

00:01:42

seconds, just like Traffic light

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numbers, just that's all, there, where Lenin is

00:01:48

every 5 meters and along Lenin Street

00:01:52

it’s all all there everything is there where Guarantor of

00:01:55

quality good conversation in the yard this is a

00:01:57

puddle of tavern underfoot it’s all there everything there there’s

00:02:00

such a pillar here there’s a trodden

00:02:03

bypass it’s all there

00:02:06

but the internet is good for some reason here’s the

00:02:09

internet everywhere LTE this is the Internet. We have

00:02:12

excellent Internet. Tell us that they are

00:02:15

raping us, do

00:02:25

n’t think that we are just collective farmers,

00:02:27

although on TNT these hillbilly series are

00:02:35

for whom you are filming this; in Moscow

00:02:39

they don’t watch it, and in the regions they laugh at it;

00:02:41

there are no such houses with painted

00:02:47

apples, such beautiful ones. happens

00:02:51

at a fire, no one laughs,

00:02:54

this is grief.

00:02:56

This is bad. We help and we do

00:03:01

n’t dance under Federico Fellinin near the river either.

00:03:14

concert at home for a damn what a set

00:03:16

table we look at mother Seryozha Dad

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Here, shaved,

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we consider half of everyone here to be roosters Well, of

00:03:29

course,

00:03:33

and the other half are

00:03:35

naturally considered their lovers, naturally in short,

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now the regions will perform who will

00:03:40

applaud the loudest We grab from the

00:03:43

audience and take them to the region we make teeth cheap

00:03:45

qualitatively and put it in place

00:03:48

[applause]

00:03:55

[music]

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We all saw such a picture on the side of

00:04:03

the highway

00:04:12

Well, who in the world is better stepfather,

00:04:17

at least let’s not go to the side of the road

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I’m all

00:04:29

Well, that’s it, in principle, a jar full of it with

00:04:32

deps, I’ll take it thank you

00:04:48

[music]

00:04:49

[applause]

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and the only person who can meet you more kindly than your mother is the

00:04:58

woman who

00:05:00

works at the reception of the sauna, the boys are my

00:05:03

darlings, my good ones, well done

00:05:05

for a ride,

00:05:08

Lord, and the girls I have today are also

00:05:11

good [ __ ], my giveaway

00:05:13

prostitutes are like this, I’m telling you straight away,

00:05:15

it won’t be possible to take me off as a joke.

00:05:19

Yes, we won’t order girls Yes,

00:05:22

boys, look, it’s very slippery here, I’ll

00:05:25

give you slippers to fall here, you can see

00:05:26

a bruise, you see this is for me because

00:05:29

[applause]

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condoms are in fact Yes, we won’t

00:05:37

order girls, you don’t understand there’s

00:05:39

such a room here Just put it on,

00:05:41

God forbid you scratch something now but I don’t

00:05:44

need it, you don’t need it, no one needs it

00:05:47

Let’s do it for 5 hours We won’t be able to We’ll do it at 5 o’clock

00:05:49

from 8:00 am Horror quest with

00:05:52

diseases Let’s do it for three hours normally

00:05:54

only in alpha bank the highest

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00:05:59

alpha account Open in April and

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get 9.5% from the first month

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00:06:16

now many women believe that you should

00:06:19

accept your body as it is

00:06:22

on the bus

00:06:24

[applause]

00:06:36

woman, can you remove your breasts?

00:06:40

I may reveal the secret, but your

00:06:43

mother has the same

00:06:45

I In general, I think so, you have a

00:06:48

Ferrari, you can’t hide it in the village.

00:06:50

You just destroyed my dream of a

00:06:53

Ferrari.

00:06:54

Well, why are you silent, but she

00:06:56

accepts herself as she is, and she won’t

00:06:59

take pills, so we’re in a psychiatric hospital

00:07:01

and we’re taking

00:07:02

Granny,

00:07:15

and every man has a certain

00:07:18

moment comes a revaluation of values,

00:07:20

dear, I don’t understand why we’re getting divorced

00:07:27

Well, you can’t provide me with

00:07:30

money, it’s not a problem It’s just a tragedy

00:07:34

and it fell

00:07:36

Well, it’s okay, the TV got into pawnshops,

00:07:39

you see, the last time

00:07:43

you know, it’s

00:07:51

funny, as always, that’s why I

00:07:54

fell in love with you

00:07:57

faster than coffee shops in all cities,

00:08:00

only new microdistricts are appearing, but

00:08:02

even microdistricts New businesses are

00:08:05

opening old ones there

00:08:07

It’s great that the new residential complex Yes, the clean one doesn’t

00:08:12

stink But this is while yours has come down to earth from heaven to you,

00:08:17

or rather, individual entrepreneur Yurasya with his 24-hour

00:08:21

Pelican store, I’ll sell everything through the window

00:08:24

right away, I’ll tell you about the store there

00:08:27

will be an entrance here, it will be clear from the very

00:08:29

sad cat and the scattered fish

00:08:30

heads on the door there will be a Pepsi poster so

00:08:33

old and rare, let's go inside

00:08:36

naturally, an angry saleswoman comes after us after finishing her cigarette,

00:08:38

because

00:08:40

she just lit a cigarette, she sits with a white

00:08:42

border, classic slippers, pink

00:08:45

fur socks, right here one eye there

00:08:46

Lilya Let's go to the store

00:08:50

Let's go to the store Here I do

00:08:52

n't need a cash register

00:08:54

because I have a phone number for transfer but the

00:08:56

online store never receives anything here

00:08:59

I'll have ice cream, everything stinks of meat And the

00:09:01

price tags for ice cream are mixed with the

00:09:02

price tags for dumplings anyway,

00:09:03

guess what, we'll go to the Raptor household chemicals department,

00:09:06

we'll go back to the store

00:09:08

here I'll have two stolen

00:09:10

carts made of magnets here I'll have

00:09:12

shawarma hot dogs hamburger everything with

00:09:15

Korean carrots here I'll have

00:09:17

a leak here I'll have ketchup brand

00:09:19

ketchup there's a fart from a red bottle so

00:09:21

very pink on the label Cook

00:09:25

where are you that this is delicious right here I

00:09:27

'll have this glass refrigerator

00:09:28

on top like this Armenian lavash hangs

00:09:30

every hour the saleswoman will pour something from a bucket

00:09:32

onto the street I don't know what's

00:09:35

transparent at the entrance very heavy,

00:09:37

cut like that, [ __ ] Now no one

00:09:40

will come in, especially children, but they will still come to me

00:09:43

because for

00:09:44

some reason I have very tasty bread.

00:09:55

Listen, well, there is not enough assortment for you, any

00:09:57

supermarket will make it for you, my friend, I

00:10:00

was taking in air in my chest because I

00:10:02

remembered the herring in In a white bucket right here, it

00:10:04

will stand here, I will have

00:10:06

cookies by weight, which have already been weighed, there

00:10:08

will be condoms with a photo of a

00:10:10

naked woman who most likely

00:10:11

died a long time ago, God forbid, you take an

00:10:13

item with a price tag, they turned back,

00:10:16

also without price tags,

00:10:18

at the end, count it on a

00:10:20

resident-style calculator I don’t know there will be

00:10:24

sweets that will make kids have tongues

00:10:26

red green blue marmalades with all the

00:10:29

parts of a vampire vampire teeth vampire eyes

00:10:31

vampire head all analogues mmd

00:10:34

everything except m&m’s puffed rice you

00:10:37

think he’s dead for nothing I have

00:10:38

frostbitten enemies here will be

00:10:41

sold

00:10:46

here there will be a working chocolate for me in

00:10:49

case the saleswoman wants something like this and

00:10:51

treat it like this thank you thank you and back

00:10:52

to the counter on the refusal camera at the checkout

00:10:55

monitor so that you can see yourself from the back That's how

00:10:56

the fan could be pinned

00:10:58

only on the saleswoman it blows only without a

00:11:00

casing on top the vegetable department

00:11:02

has all the husks under the onions, potatoes, all the soft

00:11:04

carrots are all bending, here one

00:11:07

tile of tile will be missed

00:11:08

carefully near the extension cord that goes

00:11:10

into the refrigerator, which on the first day was

00:11:11

white and now worn down by

00:11:13

horseradish in the store, swearing is prohibited

00:11:15

because this son, saleswoman, grandfather,

00:11:17

homework, son Aslan and let’s not forget

00:11:20

that I’m a patriot, that’s why there are only chips

00:11:22

Russian potatoes with cigarettes only

00:11:24

Russian style class only Russian gift and

00:11:27

all this will be brought to me by an Uzbek

00:11:31

[applause]

00:11:37

and Anti-policeman at the checkout

00:11:39

[applause]

00:11:41

and the original cola is still there

00:11:42

because drunks drink mostly

00:11:44

bell

00:11:47

and now I won’t make a mistake with us very much

00:11:50

You can hear the lights burning

00:11:53

[applause]

00:11:58

Well, in general, everything seems to be going well Well,

00:12:02

probably not, we’re in vain,

00:12:06

but if I say I’m red and white and buy

00:12:08

wine from which it’s normal to fly on the toilet later

00:12:33

[applause]

00:12:52

Our first concert

00:12:53

[applause ]

00:13:02

Respect and respect,

00:13:07

the main thing is that I like this song,

00:13:13

let's go Laysan I love you Let's

00:13:16

start this improvisation

00:13:18

he had everything except his own

00:13:21

evening show show of will April 16 at 9:00

00:13:26

pm

00:13:33

[music]

00:13:42

[music]

Description:

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