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Video tags
Subtitles
Russian
00:00:00
we don't choose lovers for a long time,00:00:03
that's obvious,00:00:05
but sometimes00:00:08
we fall in00:00:11
love with a forbidden person,00:00:18
my sister's boyfriend,00:00:22
my daughter's girlfriend00:00:23
[Music]00:00:25
or even a married colleague.00:00:29
Today we're going to talk about00:00:31
forbidden loves00:00:34
when you lie forbidden loves ah00:00:36
yes in this life as they say we00:00:38
never stop being surprised by the00:00:40
circumstances of life we want one00:00:42
thing and it is quite the opposite00:00:44
that presents itself to us cost of00:00:46
it show will develop on this00:00:48
question of forbidden loves yes but00:00:50
it is a question of emotion are we00:00:52
master of our emotions00:00:53
ultimately this is the question we must00:00:55
ask ourselves is love forbidden00:00:58
there are prohibitions that we are obliged to00:00:59
defy at times we will talk about them in00:01:01
this show00:01:04
we are on the men's set00:01:05
here the only show that would have you00:01:09
then take your stool00:01:13
and welcome00:01:16
[Music]00:01:30
[Music]00:01:42
on our plateau and there if you00:01:45
take us downstairs I you are in the00:01:46
areas from here I am with my00:01:48
everyday friends the son of Gondo00:01:51
his name is he is just here hello00:01:54
brother hello brother and he is for00:01:57
I'm the most famous of the François00:02:00
his name is couture yes of course00:02:01
after00:02:03
hello syrup welcome how are you you're00:02:05
doing you're doing well00:02:07
today we're not alone00:02:10
we have some important guests00:02:12
she's the daughter of Koffi00:02:15
and gave her the first name of Virginie00:02:18
welcome to our set thank00:02:22
you very much thank you00:02:27
she is not alone she00:02:29
comes to us from Sweden00:02:32
she comes from Sweden and her name is00:02:36
Aziza genes exactly very well00:02:40
pronounced thank you it's when you say00:02:43
invite sizes there it's00:02:44
physically or it's at what level00:02:45
you know that you see these two women00:02:49
beaming on our set00:02:51
it's to talk to us about00:02:52
forbidden loves completely and you know they00:02:55
are of such elegance that I cannot00:02:57
describe them, that's it, so we are going to00:02:58
allow those who are outside this00:03:01
set to join in the debate, they join00:03:04
in the debate00:03:07
[Music]00:03:09
I am going to stop the relationship because00:03:10
the parents don't agree we ca00:03:12
n't get married so we'll delay00:03:15
for nothing or if there are solutions he00:03:18
gives us if there are sacrifices00:03:20
to make or not we make but there are the00:03:24
parents who don't want it at all so we00:03:25
let it go and Apple blacksmith he does00:03:29
n't get married that's what the parents00:03:30
said00:03:31
there was pasta which was signed00:03:34
with our 7 I can say that and then there00:03:37
is a gift and then Bosso that at the level of00:03:40
Mali and he does not marry otherwise we have00:03:42
no problem it is married to00:03:45
everyone first on the forbidden hand if00:03:47
it is the religion which is the basis of00:03:49
the prohibition of love I don't believe00:03:51
that no, this love in fact because00:03:54
at my level I don't want to take00:03:56
my children knowing that here with a00:03:59
spouse who is of an opposite religion00:04:01
my children I cannot accept that my00:04:03
children face to face with them I would00:04:05
always like that your parts which will make00:04:06
my religion in fact he will also want00:04:08
the children but we are going to put his00:04:10
children in these people of divergence there00:04:11
we not what is going here it will become00:04:13
tomorrow my good in my opinion it is necessary to get00:04:15
married with a leave or the family00:04:17
agrees my parents agree00:04:19
and then I am for when you force your00:04:21
head if it is not false but it is not00:04:23
all force by the way it it's not all in00:04:25
force by forcing you you're going to00:04:28
take things that will00:04:30
catch up with you tomorrow it's on both00:04:32
sides the parents don't want the other00:04:34
side of the name the other side also of the name00:04:36
so for to do is to let it00:04:39
hurt but we're going to do it with two forces00:04:42
and then it doesn't take he can force it00:04:44
too and then it takes we say the00:04:46
gifts as they say and then the bossaux00:04:48
they don't even get married00:04:51
and then you as we often say there00:04:53
is Mia and then there are sweaters there are00:04:56
Diakité les Diallo it doesn't matter00:04:59
because we were born to find00:05:01
so we if we are in it00:05:04
the question that was asked to those who00:05:06
are off our plateau it's what00:05:09
would you do if you find yourself in a00:05:10
situation where love seems forbidden00:05:14
when you lie why often we00:05:17
are attracted00:05:19
to impossible love it's in the00:05:22
nature of man00:05:24
in nature of man we will realize00:05:26
that generally all the things00:05:28
to which he is not easily00:05:30
exposed will in fact become an object of00:05:34
research it is a bit like if we want to00:05:37
go and discover why we should not00:05:39
do it okay00:05:41
and it is also in fact ultimately this00:05:45
desire for discovery which is in fact part00:05:48
of the human being the human being he00:05:50
wants to explore he wants to discover00:05:52
and therefore if we say that for example this00:05:55
relationship should not have place it will00:05:58
in fact naturally generate00:06:00
hormones OK and one of them00:06:03
is adrenaline00:06:07
which will wake up and we have the feeling00:06:09
that there is something to challenge and and00:06:12
that generally when we challenge ourselves we00:06:15
are in this logic of fighting00:06:17
for our love and that's what made00:06:21
the story of Romeo and Juliet very famous, that's what there is at the00:06:25
same time you see this notion of00:06:27
we want something but the the00:06:30
whole world is reading against us and together we00:06:33
must be able to find a way to00:06:35
make Hamlet this work one of the00:06:39
most famous in the world and so that's00:06:41
it in large part in fact this00:06:44
reason which explains why we00:06:47
maybe tempted to go towards so-called forbidden loves00:06:55
what is the question this is the question00:06:56
I reached you weren't there if00:06:58
I was there it's the same question00:07:00
I think Yuma00:07:02
is not that in fact Yuma says00:07:05
the essential thing00:07:06
is the prohibition to this force of attraction00:07:09
because we have seen it we want to00:07:11
assert ourselves so men like00:07:13
prohibitions yes everything that is00:07:15
prohibited in this attractive capacity00:07:17
which makes people want to discover00:07:18
the game have seen brave and we are00:07:20
a generation where people want00:07:22
their conviction their desire and the choice is00:07:25
made to the Pinnacle so when it is00:07:27
like that if he finds himself facing a wall00:07:28
they will try to get around us but00:07:30
they will do everything to impose themselves but00:07:32
at the same time in different cases of so-00:07:34
called forbidden love especially which seems00:07:36
forbidden there are people who have00:07:37
nevertheless managed to impose their love what00:07:39
because there are dimensions00:07:40
of expression of love where it discourages00:07:41
even those who were in opposition00:07:44
in the past because they are00:07:45
convinced that in fact letting them do00:07:47
what needs to be done and then good if00:07:49
finitude is ever pleasant so much the00:07:51
better if it goes badly also too bad00:07:52
when you are embarrassed00:07:55
what will you do if you are in this00:07:57
situation00:07:58
okay already I say to myself00:08:01
love is forbidden the forbidden in00:08:03
relation to what in relation to my values00:08:06
in relation to the other who is in front of00:08:08
me in relation to what in fact in what00:08:09
context is this love prohibited00:08:12
if I find myself with a person for00:08:14
whom I have feelings and this00:08:16
person is already in a relationship or00:08:19
this person is already or the00:08:22
parents oppose00:08:26
your friend or not for me it's not00:08:31
possible00:08:32
for you it's not possible in relation00:08:34
to my values in relation to my00:08:42
moralistic of your colleague who was already00:08:45
married never to you you don't like00:08:48
[Laughs]00:08:53
when we talk about forbidden love what are you00:08:54
thinking about in fact I would like to00:08:56
come back a little to what you are00:08:57
saying because I I found it very00:08:59
interesting what you both have00:09:00
and I would like to say for example that00:09:02
when you take the example of Hamlet or00:09:04
you take the example of Romeo and Juliet00:09:05
already there is a perspective that we must00:09:07
talk about it is the age as an adolescent00:09:09
because they are children but also00:09:12
the time and the social constraints of00:09:14
the time because something00:09:16
forbidden is in relation to a00:09:17
prohibited context in relation to what in00:09:20
my religion to my morality00:09:22
often has a mixture because morality00:09:24
and religion go together exactly00:09:26
in relation to popular thought00:09:29
or popular opinion which what00:09:31
I find very interesting on the00:09:33
primitive side that you describe we are00:09:35
animals all the same we have a very00:09:37
primitive side and therefore if we see00:09:39
something which is forbidden or which is red00:09:41
which either we try to leave from there or00:09:44
otherwise we try the hunter side but the00:09:47
hunter side it is and in fact it is00:09:49
a little exalted or it is we it we00:09:51
feel it because we are told that you00:09:53
can't really have that but in00:09:56
relation to what in relation to the00:09:58
social constraint it is social constraints00:10:00
they evolve00:10:02
they always evolve so what we00:10:04
considered to be a forbidden love00:10:05
15-20 years ago 30 years ago maybe not there00:10:08
absolutely nothing forbidden now00:10:10
so what does the ban00:10:12
actually do that's what I would00:10:13
really like to try to understand where I00:10:15
would like you to help me understand00:10:17
the question00:10:18
of prohibition we can we can put00:10:21
dashboards in place one of the00:10:23
first dashboards it could00:10:25
actually be morality or00:10:28
precisely religion so in the00:10:32
context where those who are in this00:10:35
relationship of love forbidden00:10:38
to values OK or as a frame of00:10:41
reference their morality or also their00:10:45
religion they will stick precisely00:10:46
to the precept to the commandment etc. that the00:10:50
religion that imposes on them there is a00:10:52
second interesting context which can00:10:54
be analyzed sociologically in00:10:57
relation to everything that has incest00:10:59
everything that is00:11:01
inter-caste relationships which are sometimes prohibited00:11:04
in this context there we will say if I00:11:07
am in a social group or it is said00:11:10
the law of the group social says00:11:12
brothers from the same mother or the same father00:11:14
cannot love each other this does00:11:18
not prohibit love but prohibits its realization00:11:20
so I really want us to be in00:11:23
a corner of the mind that love does00:11:26
not in fact make the difference as a00:11:29
feeling it does not know how to decide if00:11:31
I love my brother my sister an animal etc.00:11:35
no it does not make this difference00:11:36
however man is socialized okay00:11:39
he is socialized so at a given moment00:11:41
he learned through his education00:11:45
through the norms and values that he00:11:46
acquired that this is done and this is00:11:48
not done this is the second00:11:49
fundamental element the third element00:11:53
of prohibition can be linked to a00:11:56
personal conviction00:11:58
it is my conviction yes we say that it is00:12:01
feasible ok I take the context00:12:03
for example of the ex of my best00:12:06
friend or the ex finally of my best friend00:12:08
I prefer to say that like that otherwise it00:12:09
looks very strange ok so it's not00:12:13
it's not a00:12:15
forbidden forbidden yes but that's my conviction00:12:17
my conviction in terms of loyalty it's00:12:20
a value it's that I have a friend that I00:12:23
consider myself to be someone for whom I have00:12:25
a lot of affection, respect etc. if he00:12:27
has been with someone I cannot00:12:29
find myself being but the new lover of00:12:31
this person that is the different ones00:12:36
I said the first element is00:12:39
everything that is cultural, religious or00:12:42
moral, the second context is00:12:45
sociological, completely sociological,00:12:46
that is to say, society says that00:12:49
we don't do that here, although it's00:12:51
not really something00:12:53
something I won't stop at but as the00:12:55
society has decided and then if the society00:12:58
something after a while there00:13:00
will be a force of execution we00:13:02
agree that is to say that at a00:13:04
given moment it can there will be coercion00:13:06
if I decide to do what society00:13:09
says that I must not do00:13:11
coercive force means that I am put in00:13:13
prison, I am expelled from the social group00:13:16
etc to preserve its harmony so00:13:19
for that I will not do it but the 3rd00:13:21
yourself personally on what about00:13:24
someone who is in a forbidden love00:13:26
for example00:13:28
someone who falls00:13:30
in love with his colleague who is married00:13:33
or with00:13:36
his wife's friend or sister or the friend00:13:40
of you know what syrup the problem is00:13:43
not love00:13:46
the fact that you even fall in love with00:13:49
your own mother that's not the problem00:13:51
besides the DIP complex exists00:13:53
that's not the problem but the00:13:55
problem is the realization it's00:13:57
like having an ambition there is no00:13:59
problem but do you have the00:14:00
means for this ambition is00:14:02
it achievable a bit like when you00:14:04
take the Smart there has the dimension in00:14:06
fact it is an objective tool the00:14:08
realistic dimension is what I00:14:10
want to experience in fact what I sleep with00:14:12
my mother no because I love her no00:14:14
that's where I say that for me I do00:14:17
not judge the one who loves love it is00:14:20
a universal feeling it is a00:14:22
normal feeling personal judgment00:14:26
is not focused on the love he00:14:28
manifests my feeling is based on the00:14:31
context in which he is and what00:14:33
are the values that are acceptable or00:14:35
not part of that moment I00:14:37
would have told him ok you love it's normal but00:14:39
this love cannot succeed and00:14:41
as it cannot succeed00:14:43
you must be able to do the impasse on that we will00:14:44
perhaps see in another part of00:14:46
the show how to mourn a00:14:48
forbidden love I saw that Virginie00:14:50
wanted to intervene in the situation there are 300:14:53
dimensions therefore there is love which is00:14:54
universal in everyday speaking and00:14:56
then there is love which is from the soul which00:14:58
emanates which is called scourge and love00:15:01
Eros so normally if you love in00:15:04
the same way as you love your mother who00:15:06
is love maybe philo you ca00:15:08
n't have an Eros love because hero00:15:10
it's really for00:15:11
sexual relations that's it so00:15:13
the ban here will be done at the level00:15:15
where you love a person who is supposed00:15:18
to be your friend or your friend's ex00:15:21
and who is supposed to be your friend00:15:23
too but you are starting to want to00:15:24
perhaps go and push to have00:15:26
sexual relations this is where the prohibition00:15:27
in fact will come to arise through example you00:15:30
love your brother is this a00:15:33
forbidden love00:15:34
going out for example with his friend's ex00:15:37
yes it is a forbidden love to the00:15:40
extent that00:15:41
in terms of loyalty if you are00:15:43
still friends it presents very badly yes00:15:47
but that's what they say forbidden that's00:15:49
what they said it's not love itself that00:15:51
prohibits it's the expression of this00:15:54
painting the fact of living it because you00:15:56
put yourself in the place of your friend you will00:15:58
discover this and then she herself00:16:00
may be embarrassed too but sincerely00:16:01
I would like that we now enter00:16:03
into the different frameworks because00:16:04
sincerely there are00:16:06
societal prohibitions which tire me example which00:16:09
tire me for example my parents are I don't00:16:11
agree, for example, we're not of the00:16:14
same religion, that also tires me,00:16:17
there's a certain age, you see, it's00:16:18
tiring, there are people who are00:16:20
with older or less00:16:22
elderly people, but that's it. works well but I00:16:25
saw people as soon as you say00:16:26
10 years ago or else it's not possible00:16:28
it was a man he comes across a woman00:16:30
who has an elderly people born there no no00:16:32
it's not good you cannot put it00:16:33
together because00:16:34
it considers that they in their principle00:16:36
age becomes problematic but it is00:16:38
the choice of two people I think that00:16:39
people in relation to the ego of the00:16:41
human being also and in relation to the00:16:43
popular culture that we talk about00:16:47
I take the case of age as he said00:16:49
for you there is a forbidden love in00:16:52
fact I think that asking this question00:16:55
to my version of 10 years younger00:16:57
I would have said yes because in fact00:16:59
I was calibrated on certain certain00:17:02
social receipts on the fact that as a00:17:05
woman I would want a man who was00:17:06
older because age represents a00:17:08
certain maturity a certain00:17:10
understanding a certain possibility of00:17:12
giving me a life a life to which00:17:14
finally the life I would like 10 years00:17:17
later I understand that in fact a00:17:19
40 year old man does not need to be more00:17:21
mature and more secure than a00:17:24
25 year old man or a man who is younger00:17:25
than me on the contrary can really00:17:27
have the capacity to give me what00:17:30
I need emotionally00:17:31
affectively and even economically00:17:34
so I think that there is a figure00:17:36
I don't I found myself in a kind00:17:39
of situation I think that I did I 've00:17:41
been an older man and00:17:43
now being single for00:17:45
a while and seeing how00:17:47
some relationships play out00:17:48
around me I have an understanding that00:17:49
age is often really just a00:17:52
number and that is not in relation to00:17:54
age but it is in relation to the00:17:55
life experiences that people have had to00:17:57
experience in order to00:18:01
develop a certain00:18:04
understanding of life and in fact so00:18:06
my slightly older version looks00:18:10
critically my version the more I00:18:13
said but seriously you are a00:18:14
bit stupid so I think that the ban00:18:16
for Mania no ban I could00:18:18
really go out with a man who is00:18:19
less who is younger than me without00:18:21
problem as much as I could go out00:18:22
with a man who is older than me00:18:24
without problem by 10 years or 15 years in00:18:26
relation to the fact of what I can00:18:28
give him and what I expect in00:18:29
the relationship and that I don't think whether it00:18:31
's a problem if if it's a problem00:18:33
for my mother I need to tell her00:18:35
mom I'm listening to you I hear you but to00:18:38
what extent does this sacrifice have value00:18:40
or benefit for your life or for my00:18:42
life in real life00:18:44
it changes it changes for who what is it what00:18:47
I lose compared to what00:18:50
I gain or even what you have to00:18:51
gain and you know that in relation to the00:18:53
fact we are obliged to go to the00:18:56
pub00:18:58
the advert00:19:01
[Music]00:19:16
if you have just taken us on00:19:17
you are on the plateau of the men00:19:19
from here and if you are not elsewhere00:19:21
you are in the only program which00:19:24
directs you00:19:26
which allows you to find your00:19:27
destiny I am with the son of Gondo00:19:31
just the bread and my friend Yoman François00:19:34
we have some important guests00:19:36
today she is the daughter of Koffi00:19:39
Virginie and the coach and next to it there is the00:19:42
one who I spoke right away00:19:43
time00:19:46
Aziza Aziza you can continue in your00:19:49
continued development00:19:51
what I mean is that as you00:19:53
said earlier and as you00:19:54
reiterated there are certain00:19:56
social prohibitions when we talk about sociology which00:19:59
are established in relation to the evolution00:20:01
of the civilizations in which we are00:20:03
and it is in relation to the needs that we00:20:05
had to establish in order to be able to build00:20:07
flourishing civilizations in rich people who00:20:09
have wealth and who need00:20:11
we need to establish certain00:20:13
hierarchies so we have a highway code00:20:15
like being able to drive without there being00:20:18
an accident but00:20:20
as civilization evolves00:20:23
there are certain00:20:24
prohibitions which are really archaic00:20:26
such as for example the fact that we are00:20:28
different religions in what sense is a00:20:30
religion two people with00:20:32
different religions cannot00:20:33
coexist look we take the we take00:20:36
we take the Ivorian society we have00:20:38
Muslims we have Christians we have00:20:40
all kinds we coexist is not -this is00:20:42
not why there is00:20:44
still a need in 2023 to have a discussion on00:20:47
the fact that if I am a Christian and00:20:48
I fall in love with someone who is00:20:49
Muslim we cannot exist in00:20:51
fact we try to do certain00:20:53
certain parities of00:20:55
forbidden relationships whereas in real everyday life00:20:58
I am Christian you could get together00:21:00
with a fetishist or a00:21:04
ritualistic fetishist or not because it is not00:21:07
in relation to ritualism as that00:21:09
it is in relation to the person with00:21:11
whom I put myself given it is not00:21:14
given that she is ritualistic but00:21:15
given that she has certain00:21:17
convictions00:21:19
with really a certain broadness and00:21:22
these conditions where it is conviction00:21:25
there ensure that they are00:21:26
ritualistic he knows that in which sense00:21:28
we place things you see what I00:21:30
mean is it the fact that00:21:31
I am Christian first of all it is the fact00:21:32
that I have certain convictions which make00:21:34
me a Christian of course and you00:21:37
have certain convictions which are and00:21:38
these are two convictions in this sense00:21:40
perhaps they will not adhere00:21:42
but it is not the fact that you are00:21:46
my sense to me Christian in that00:21:47
sense what convictions we share do00:21:49
not share as a Christian or00:21:50
Muslim or whatever if we have00:21:51
convictions in common no matter the00:21:53
ball of our convictions no matter no00:21:55
matter the colors we use to00:21:57
being able to talk about what we're talking about00:21:58
isn't that at the very base the00:22:01
very meaning of what makes us what we00:22:03
are who we're trying to highlight00:22:07
I completely agree with what00:22:09
Aziza shares with us after you know00:22:12
in the Stratis stratification of00:22:15
society00:22:16
it is if you want00:22:18
certain sociological reflections have the00:22:22
aim in fact of preserving the group00:22:23
to preserve the unity of the group so at a00:22:26
given moment for example when we are going to00:22:28
say such a00:22:30
forbidden relationship for example at a certain00:22:33
time we did not have00:22:36
medicinal scientific advances but finally00:22:40
everything we have today00:22:42
to help us sometimes to manage00:22:45
certain situations so we might as well00:22:47
prohibit at least that allows us to do that it00:22:49
allows you to channel a certain number of00:22:51
things for example so you can00:22:53
behind that it's important that we00:22:55
actually understand the spirit of the forbidden00:22:56
so once we have understood the spirit00:22:58
of the forbidden that becomes easier to00:23:01
lift the lock and stay attached00:23:05
respond to specific needs yes00:23:07
you have very specific needs for example00:23:10
when we prohibit love between a00:23:12
woman of a very advanced age and a00:23:15
younger man in fact the idea behind00:23:18
it is the fear of the capacity for00:23:21
longevity okay longevity00:23:25
reproduction since at the base in any00:23:27
case in the secular years00:23:28
the objective of marriage was not00:23:30
pleasure the objective of the mask the00:23:32
reproduction of the species and therefore when00:23:34
you get married you have to multiply the00:23:36
chances of reproduction but if the woman00:23:39
is already of an advanced age her00:23:41
reproduction percentage is already very very00:23:44
low the second thing00:23:46
was that there was a bad00:23:48
perception too of women's sexuality00:23:50
it was estimated that younger women00:23:52
were more sexually active00:23:54
than women of a certain age and therefore00:23:56
for a young man married an older woman that00:24:00
would mean you will not have more00:24:03
joy that he will not have more pleasure00:24:04
in your marriage that is extremely00:24:07
false but completely false at this00:24:09
time you must understand that00:24:11
sociology also evolves with ideology00:24:13
it also evolves with philosophy it00:24:16
also evolves with the capacity for00:24:17
understanding or of apprehension that a00:24:20
society can have about festivals for00:24:22
example of prohibitions linked to00:24:23
religions it has not always existed no00:24:26
it has not always existed it existed at00:24:29
periods when religion itself00:24:31
had become conflicting and so if00:24:34
religion is conflictual, we might as well00:24:36
preserve people from00:24:38
different regions so as not to have their union00:24:40
arouse, but there have been times in00:24:43
which there were00:24:44
absolutely strategic religious marriages whose00:24:46
aim was to calm down, for example,00:24:48
people who were in opposition there were00:24:51
political type marriages we00:24:52
saw in ancient Nubia for example00:24:54
that Nubian kings were going to marry00:24:57
daughters of another people in00:25:00
fact obtaining a certain stability a certain00:25:01
peace since we are married00:25:04
so there are in history a lot of00:25:06
traces like that and today we00:25:09
simply stay on the00:25:11
apparent idea there I am Christian you are00:25:14
Muslim we should not get married00:25:16
but what is really happening00:25:17
what What happens is that you00:25:19
realize that when you are a Christian, love,00:25:22
life goes with that because what is00:25:23
love ultimately is it is this00:25:25
strong affection that pushes me to give00:25:28
a person agreement with the aim of00:25:31
but what happens is that the00:25:33
Muslim opposite, whether I am Christian00:25:36
or not, love is not going to be prohibited and00:25:39
that is what I want us to understand00:25:40
clearly in our show is that00:25:41
love does not forbid anything at the base00:25:44
but in its manifestation we will00:25:47
now encounter realities00:25:48
the environment most of the time it00:25:51
is the parents or here it is the00:25:54
different finally the different losses00:25:56
of different people around we will00:25:57
say ok there is no problem we will00:25:59
manage but at the moment when we are going to make00:26:00
our love public at the moment when the00:26:03
parents must intervene this is where at00:26:05
a given moment parents or00:26:07
religious guides or00:26:09
religious dignitaries will say well it can't be00:26:11
done why because of the transfer00:26:12
which will ultimately come to join00:26:14
the other etc.00:26:16
your forbidden love and that's what I've00:26:20
always said I say it's normal to have00:26:22
feelings but afterwards you have to00:26:24
actually have the honesty to look at the00:26:28
plausible nature of this feeling for me I have00:26:30
no problem I will ask myself a00:26:32
thousand times I will give you00:26:34
this answer a thousand times the problem is not00:26:36
love but at a moment given this love00:26:38
so that it is longevity you must00:26:40
now use your00:26:42
intelligence to your head love comes from the00:26:44
heart but its longevity comes from the head00:26:46
if we put the head aside and at a00:26:49
given moment we will be confronted the very00:26:51
fact of saying our love to each other is00:26:53
already difficult to take00:26:55
the expression of just it is already00:26:57
difficult so we are aware of that00:26:59
and together we put in place the tools00:27:02
that we need, we put in place the weapons00:27:03
that we need. it is necessary to defend it and it is00:27:06
possible in any case if it does not affect a00:27:08
certain social context where it is it is00:27:10
demoralizing or it is it is degrading00:27:13
for the society in which we are if00:27:15
it is an aversion well I will not00:27:17
elaborate this aspect but if in00:27:19
a certain society we do not accept00:27:21
a certain form of love and you00:27:22
want to impose it you see you00:27:24
will in fact gang up not00:27:26
only against society but when00:27:28
the very principle which makes this society00:27:30
there at this moment I say it is of no use00:27:32
because your love will not be able to00:27:34
be lived because on a daily basis you00:27:36
will be entering into attracting00:27:38
football to you but if we are in00:27:39
contexts like I am Christian, you are00:27:42
Muslim, it's up to us to understand each other,00:27:44
you see, it's up to us to understand each other, it's up to00:27:45
us to talk to each other and say at what00:27:48
point, for example, for me it's not00:27:50
a problem that you go to the prayer00:27:52
on Fridays and me going to occupy00:27:55
Sunday it is already at the level of the two00:27:57
but if there is one of you who has00:27:59
reservations and who is not00:28:00
honest enough to express them and00:28:03
that the difficulty now it comes from00:28:05
the environment that we end up saying00:28:06
ah well finally could00:28:09
n't you for example convert since here00:28:12
I find it unhealthy I find it00:28:14
manipulative I find it false and for00:28:16
me such a relationship should not have00:28:18
a future00:28:19
yes I also wanted to say that there were00:28:22
medical sources you see the00:28:25
consanguineous marriage people noticed that there00:28:27
were diseases which were linked to00:28:30
that so there is00:29:32
and then you do what you want00:29:33
except that's dangerous so when00:29:35
she comes back she acts Muslim for00:29:37
a moment but then she's a00:29:39
basic Christian so it's parents it becomes00:29:41
stories they had to hide to00:29:42
get married all that I still like to learn00:29:44
a story where there is the young girl00:29:45
who was totally going to suicide so I00:29:47
tell myself that these prohibitions are00:29:50
cultural and regional it depends on the00:29:52
place where we are but in the end I00:29:55
realize that at times to00:29:57
express your love you are obliged to00:29:58
brave what we have had to brave at00:29:59
times parents because often00:30:02
they want to see what you are really00:30:03
decided we say no you don't have to why and00:30:06
what bothers me is when the arguments00:30:07
are favored, that is to say the parent does00:30:09
not always put himself in the child's place00:30:11
he will tell you I know what00:30:13
is good for you I want to00:30:14
choose it like that and those who go00:30:16
further to the ethnic group there I think that00:30:18
it 'that's it again it's dramatic the00:30:20
gentleman didn't do anything we say what he00:30:22
was like or the nonsense no no they00:30:24
know we don't want to judge in fact these00:30:25
are prejudices the gentleman can be00:30:27
in love and then will choose to get together00:30:28
with her and then he will be00:30:30
the exception but we cannot his son00:30:32
sees an ethnic group or even a region00:30:34
of others memo down to the physique of the00:30:36
person or to the profession we say00:30:38
artist you have chosen these artists you00:30:40
I want that, you don't have to follow them, but00:30:43
nevertheless the artist can be a good person. I saw someone00:30:46
good, moreover, I saw people00:30:49
who said what he is, what does he make00:30:51
videos? on the Internet to be wary of it00:30:52
there you don't even know me and00:30:56
often others are sad I know00:30:58
people who until today00:30:59
had to leave their love true love they00:31:02
went to get together with people who00:31:03
don't love not but he hides to00:31:05
see himself or else it's they are tortured00:31:07
because from afar you watch for the other00:31:09
as he evolves you two are00:31:11
unhappy well listen let's00:31:13
update our society and then00:31:14
let people love as he00:31:15
hears what you wanted to intervene00:31:17
see good at this level I think00:31:19
that what I can add is that00:31:22
people who are00:31:24
faced with this kind of love should be able to assume00:31:27
because as the coach said everything at00:31:29
the moment00:31:31
society gives you advice there00:31:34
is doctrine there is morality there is00:31:36
all that but the thing is that I00:31:38
would have to come to terms with the fact that00:31:40
I marry or I get into a relationship00:31:42
with a life it's not just a00:31:44
person it's a family education a00:31:46
way of living and for me love00:31:49
itself it's something00:31:53
of your colleague who is married00:31:56
someone who is in love00:32:02
the feeling of love may not be00:32:04
logical but the decision to make00:32:07
this love live must be very well thought out00:32:09
absolutely because love in fact we00:32:12
decide in fact to love because otherwise00:32:15
we get married real everyone we will00:32:16
get in touch with everyone00:32:17
that's it but we decide at a given moment00:32:19
you not only look at the feelings00:32:21
you look at many other aspects the00:32:23
feeling the values of the person00:32:25
what the person gives off all that in fact00:32:28
have you ever experienced this kind of situation00:32:31
in relation to00:32:33
Koffi I know that you have necessarily had a00:32:36
guy during00:32:41
which00:32:51
we talk about desire because I think00:32:53
we say a lot we say a lot of00:32:55
things00:32:56
but but I mean how many times00:32:58
finally maybe it's an experience00:33:00
that is personal to me how many times00:33:01
I was able to see someone who00:33:03
absolutely does not correspond to some of the standards00:33:05
that I have emotionally, affectively00:33:07
and perhaps even theoretically but00:33:09
who still manages to shout desire00:33:14
in less desire physically00:33:20
well in his discussion and the difference00:33:22
between desire and love and00:33:25
feeling the real feeling and then00:33:28
having desire for someone it's00:33:31
something else I can be00:33:33
somewhere and I want to see a boy00:33:34
maybe I'll see you say00:33:35
frankly operational he is handsome he00:33:37
is tall there are many things you00:33:39
open your mouth and I say to myself wow00:33:40
what is it where he comes from but the00:33:42
feeling of desire for attraction on the00:33:44
physical is still there is it00:33:47
what do you understand what I00:33:48
mean and I think that in in00:33:50
this situation of course of course I00:33:52
think that if we're going to be honest I00:33:55
can't be the evening00:33:57
having someone past00:34:03
there's no a lot of things to00:34:05
explain I told a little story00:34:07
a little story it could be I'm00:34:09
at a party I'm expecting where I'm even00:34:11
at a conference and I expect00:34:12
the person to be at certain00:34:14
intellectual levels because that we abuse00:34:16
this word but I00:34:18
would like to describe myself as00:34:20
someone who is sapiosexual that00:34:22
means that but well my my warming up00:34:25
is often related or to the00:34:27
intellectual capacity of discussion to feel00:34:29
ok someone someone who makes me00:34:32
curious enough who really forces me to00:34:34
think a little bit through my00:34:37
trenches and I expect maybe in00:34:39
a certain in a certain00:34:42
social context that the people who are around00:34:44
me the men who are around me00:34:45
and this ability there and then I see00:34:48
someone really very attractive I00:34:50
think he has a beautiful physique he has and00:34:52
then I can feel a little feeling00:34:55
maybe00:34:56
yes but it is already found in a00:34:58
conference00:35:02
we have TV there is no time OK00:35:05
conclusion absolutely we can we00:35:09
find ourselves in a situation where it becomes00:35:10
a little physical and then it doesn't go00:35:13
too far00:35:15
it's okay we're not going to consume everything that's00:35:18
not all the plaquali sauce that we00:35:19
have to eat00:35:20
so sometimes I just have to keep a little00:35:23
for the next day at the end of the day00:35:25
when I realize that this00:35:26
person has even if there is a certain00:35:27
physical attraction I could00:35:29
perhaps even be sleeping with her I00:35:31
still feel that it doesn't go far00:35:34
but I want I still want to00:35:36
add because that's00:35:37
something important it's you talked about it00:35:39
you talked about it it's is still00:35:41
something the truth is what you're00:35:42
saying when you have you have you have you00:35:45
have when you were a teenager the00:35:47
teenage version of me could have done00:35:48
things whatever you see but the00:35:51
adult version of 'a certain person00:35:53
realizes that no breaking things is00:35:55
just to piss me off afterwards00:35:56
no we're going to leave that because I00:35:58
like my peace more than anything00:35:59
else but it's in relation to00:36:01
the evolution of my person now00:36:02
so I think it's important to00:36:04
make the difference between what it is00:36:05
when it's something sexual00:36:06
in the fleeting moment because at the00:36:09
end of love and the relationship it's not00:36:10
the same love my feeling I can00:36:12
love you but to know that we00:36:14
are going to fight to be able to have our00:36:16
relationship00:36:18
no maybe not00:36:21
it's exactly that and then in any00:36:23
case we have to say it clearly right00:36:26
away the desire doesn't is not necessarily linked to00:36:29
love absolutely not desire is00:36:31
bestial desire it acts it is primitive00:36:34
it is the end it is the reptilian brain00:36:36
I see the opposite sex I am attracted00:36:39
to the opposite sex and and inside and it is00:36:42
devoid of anything that is feelings, you have to00:36:44
understand that when we talk about love,00:36:45
when we talk about affection, it's00:36:49
a construction that is psychological,00:36:51
you have to have a capacity that is actually00:36:54
human to get there, so you can't00:36:56
say that animals fall in love00:36:58
they have a project here the lion plans00:37:02
to make the lioness really the most00:37:04
beautiful thing no there is not this00:37:06
construction there so be careful attraction00:37:09
desire love it's really things00:37:12
said completely we have to talk about00:37:14
everything everything does so and00:37:18
how we can love a person and then00:37:20
at first intention there is no desire00:37:22
the sexual dimension even at the start00:37:26
does not exist we are impressed as00:37:27
she said I let it become for00:37:29
example important00:37:30
you see we can talk about we talk about the00:37:33
desire00:37:34
for attraction we can't talk about TV00:37:36
without advertising and00:37:39
allow us to go to the advertising00:37:48
[Music]00:37:54
if you just take us on00:37:56
we are talking today00:37:58
about forbidden loves00:38:01
what is forbidden and what is00:38:03
not00:38:04
and for that I am with00:38:07
the most beautiful boys on earth00:38:10
when you lie and until00:38:15
today I am also with the most00:38:17
beautiful women of the world00:38:19
her name is Aziza and the other Virginie00:38:27
in fact a certain number of elements which00:38:30
sometimes can be found in the same00:38:31
context what is the difference between00:38:33
desire and love then in desire00:38:37
in fact desire is carnal00:38:39
a little love no there is not00:38:41
necessarily love I am a man no00:38:44
listen to a syrup I am a man I00:38:46
see a naked woman or certain00:38:48
parts of her body I feel attracted00:38:50
because I see I have desire00:38:52
physically it's physiological00:38:54
no it's physiological I'm a man I00:38:58
am a woman I00:39:00
find myself in a certain context with00:39:01
a guy with bulging muscles etc you00:39:04
see it's physical it's in the00:39:06
carnal relationship but there is not00:39:08
yet love where we speak of love00:39:11
there is an affection which is vivid when we00:39:14
speak of affection it means that there00:39:15
is there is it takes into account three00:39:17
dimensions in the section00:39:22
[ Music]00:39:28
really in the moment it's a bit00:39:32
like it's a bit like you00:39:33
're telling me it's a bit like you're saying to me00:39:35
listen I'm hungry this is when I'm00:39:38
hungry this is it what I want is00:39:40
to eat now am I going to00:39:42
eat caviar am I going to eat00:39:48
at the first level if you are hungry00:39:52
you eat if you are thirsty you drink water00:39:54
you see that is basic so in in the00:39:58
desire there in the desire the desire itself00:40:00
may not be there is the person do00:40:01
you know what I was going out to00:40:03
tell you I have a desire it's as they say there00:40:05
we don't sort not the water we use to00:40:07
put out the fire no business you have00:40:09
a desire you find yourself why00:40:11
people at the same time people find themselves00:40:12
sometimes00:40:14
it is the confusions unfortunately00:40:16
that we have00:40:18
admitted in our minds and finally00:40:19
we designate a person thinks that we00:40:21
love him, could I just00:40:23
ask you something before you00:40:24
intervene, is there no00:40:29
difference in the interpretation00:40:31
of desire in relation to a man or in00:40:32
relation to for women which is linked to00:40:35
sexual education which is for a00:40:38
woman or for a man that often a00:40:40
man has the right to his desire he has he00:40:42
wants to make love he just needs00:40:43
but a woman will tend to00:40:45
justify the the physical act by00:40:48
saying to yourself ah I have feelings Célia00:40:49
education00:40:56
has a profile in her head in terms of00:41:00
shape size term thing everything it can00:41:03
happen that at the turn of a street00:41:04
or of an event you you come across00:41:07
the call and then immediately there is00:41:10
something that happens you are going to tell me00:41:11
there it is primitive but you open your00:41:13
mouth you say hello young lady hello00:41:15
You make a chat and she is00:41:17
intellectually beautiful you see there has00:41:18
a construction00:41:21
is it not possible that I00:41:22
see her and then she says that one your heart00:41:25
you say she I want her at the first at the00:41:27
first at the first I mean at00:41:30
a first intention ok it is always00:41:34
carnal that 'is what made me00:41:35
attracted to the person00:41:39
then you are not going to limit yourself to that you00:41:42
agree with me as long as you do00:41:43
not decide what calls for love I00:41:45
finish but because if that stir up what does that00:41:47
mean when you take the horse00:41:49
and put yours there is00:41:50
something that attracts the other that's it so00:41:52
you won't tell me that this is the horse00:41:53
exactly we agree on I00:41:57
agree, so one pulls the other,00:41:59
it can start with a desire and00:42:01
lead to I agree but say00:42:04
peremptorily that because I00:42:06
had desire therefore I love that's why00:42:08
that I still find a little00:42:09
malicious the people who continued you00:42:12
I love you here is00:42:24
syrup we confuse things a lot you00:42:26
cannot love a person you00:42:28
have just seen love is a00:42:30
construction and it begins with00:42:32
attraction through desire by many00:42:34
things but there is a construction and00:42:36
it is at the end of this construction00:42:37
as she said for example I00:42:39
expected to see someone of her00:42:40
profile I expected I saw in00:42:44
first tension like that wow he00:42:46
interests me as soon as he opens his mouth I00:42:48
'm broken what was it00:42:50
love no00:42:53
as an example I like your example because00:42:55
I would also like to ask you if you00:42:58
were at your age now you have you have00:43:00
a certain standard in relation to the time00:43:01
that you want to put into the people around00:43:02
you don't you and especially on a00:43:04
woman so that means that even if00:43:07
today you are going to find that you have a00:43:09
certain standard you would like her to be00:43:10
a certain size a certain time you are00:43:12
not ready to compromise some00:43:15
of her values some of these00:43:16
attitudes certain psycho-00:43:19
intellectual sides of this person in00:43:21
relation to these big butts aren't they00:43:31
the curves that's the pigophiles the00:43:34
famous pigophiles as soon as he sees that you00:43:36
have curves love has started it's00:43:37
not even an action it's sexual desire00:43:42
when he says I think what you00:43:44
mean yes it's when you say00:43:46
that when love00:43:47
I say not00:43:51
so much to do00:43:57
so in fact when you say that00:44:00
love begins I think that what00:44:02
you mean is that attraction00:44:04
begins00:44:05
calls out to say that here is someone someone00:44:09
with whom I could build00:44:10
something don't stop at saying that00:44:13
because I saw a person who wants00:44:16
to build something it's much00:44:17
simpler I ask you if I ask you to00:44:23
love a person it's what to love yes00:44:26
love you you are a man when you say00:44:28
this woman I love her what does that mean00:44:31
but it's not love00:44:33
then I can see a girl and then00:44:35
I said wow yes of course I'm00:44:38
activated at the same time I like her so much00:44:40
ok now that means that in00:44:43
the next moment I had seen this same00:44:45
girl you turn around in the same room00:44:47
you see another00:44:49
thing00:44:52
there this photo you are going to see the same thing there00:44:55
that I just saw there she's not an00:44:58
ordinary girl she's an00:45:00
extraordinary girl okay but with this00:45:03
moment you want more I love her like that00:45:04
I saw her I fell in love I have00:45:07
the impression00:45:11
there I talked about frizzy hair to00:45:13
say that it's not her eloquence that's00:45:16
not her beauty she can play and I00:45:19
fall in love so you see00:45:22
he said that for two seconds he said00:45:25
look he said something very00:45:27
important he said that it wasn't his00:45:28
hair it wasn't so if it wasn't that00:45:30
which was more important for him from00:45:32
that moment on you see there is in00:45:34
love there is the pure side that what is the00:45:35
time it is to say the foam it is not00:45:37
the only one00:45:38
in fact the responsibility because I00:45:41
know men yes he saw a woman00:45:42
he looked then say married it was not00:45:46
because he saw three four times the00:45:47
first day he saw the real thing like that there00:45:48
they don't even have why talk isn't00:45:50
it if it's we're going to say it's Laura who00:45:52
is getting away but something I do00:45:53
n't know what but it's is as if he was00:45:55
hypnotized by her and then he says there you go00:45:57
husband indeed the bride yes we're going to00:45:59
call it what I think the fact00:46:00
of being able is like when you go to00:46:02
a store you go to buy your avocado or00:46:04
your mango you take the mango and you00:46:06
expect that you have the hope that00:46:08
your mango it is very ripe you in00:46:10
avocado is very ripe and when you00:46:11
open it it is spoiled it can be spoiled or00:46:13
it can be very good yes but that I00:46:16
can't I can't the experience does00:46:18
not justify to me the fact that love00:46:23
at the same time like a bomb because00:46:25
that I think that it is also00:46:26
something that we are lied to with00:46:28
especially women00:46:30
we will take the different kinds which00:46:32
love which is forbidden which is not00:46:34
forbidden agree00:46:35
for you which are the forbidden loves00:46:38
it's really everything which is00:46:39
incestuous eh really linked to the00:46:42
family it's that is to say I give00:46:44
examples a brother who is with his sister00:46:45
and a son who is with his mother a father00:46:49
who is with his daughter these are people00:46:51
things that exist but it's it's00:46:52
really reality and for you00:46:54
it's at the spiritual level, that's at the00:46:55
level of religion why because00:46:57
if these people are not00:46:59
aware of the challenges they00:47:02
are going to put themselves in by agreeing to get00:47:04
together I say to myself that there is a00:47:07
religious concern that's religious that told you00:47:09
what that means what for example00:47:12
a Muslim must not necessarily00:47:14
have the same education in relation to a00:47:18
certain number of things it's not00:47:19
possible that's the same thing00:47:26
you can't marry a Buddhist no00:47:30
me marriage it is first spiritual00:47:34
not only physically00:47:38
no00:47:50
I think I will join Crépin00:47:52
on this question of when we00:47:56
endanger the life of someone else in00:47:58
relation to a relationship which 'already has00:48:00
morally which is very hard to accept00:48:01
but on top of that which can have00:48:02
biological repercussions and on00:48:08
his girlfriend's ex yes00:48:11
absolutely00:48:17
this example a little00:48:20
because we bring down we say it is00:48:22
forbidden to go start a relationship00:48:23
you are you are you are the example and I00:48:27
start with you without having been clear00:48:30
I understand that it will hurt you I00:48:33
am ready to make these efforts and to00:48:35
establish a secure relationship00:48:42
going out with00:48:45
his friend son00:48:47
fall in love with the house00:48:59
you cannot give an education to00:49:01
your child and have an attitude before00:49:04
it is because I say love yes but00:49:06
then it is to ask yourself the question of00:49:08
knowing is this love -this is00:49:10
aligned with the values it's possible00:49:12
it's not it happened in the United States00:49:13
we stopped it's just that I'm saying00:49:16
you have to think about the implications of course00:49:19
if the implications are destructive00:49:21
you can't favor your love to the00:49:24
detriment of destruction normally00:49:26
you have to remember this rule when you00:49:28
love it shouldn't hurt to take out00:49:30
your boss no that's up to you too there is00:49:33
the interview and it's important that you00:49:35
determine if it's really love00:49:38
or it's00:49:39
profit00:49:42
has fallen in love with his priest your00:49:44
lover is already ready the priest00:49:46
it's forbidden since in his00:49:49
sacerdos he is supposed not to marry00:49:50
no no but there is others who say it00:49:52
I agree but from the moment00:49:53
establishing the principle and then00:49:55
let's look at what it did with his pastor00:49:57
but the pastor is supposed to be married00:49:59
Marie of one wife even if he is00:50:01
married no he is supposed to be married00:50:03
okay because normally for00:50:04
you to be a pastor you are supposed to be married00:50:07
and the husband of one wife so if one00:50:09
of your faithful falls in love it's00:50:11
called doctor's syndrome it's00:50:13
normal every time someone00:50:15
someone does something good it00:50:18
's a hero's role it's a savior's role00:50:20
it creates them wonderfully but00:50:22
it's not even the love00:50:25
of his mother going out with00:50:28
his mother's friend that always stays in that but00:50:30
it's always it always stays in00:50:32
the values but what I would say00:50:33
is that there are taboos finally,00:50:36
kinds of taboos where you have to be00:50:38
clear exactly00:50:46
not things if I fell in love00:50:49
yes from the friend here is from my mother that00:50:51
means that it is structured it is if it is00:50:53
structures that means she is dead00:50:58
be clear enough with help00:51:01
lives there wait00:51:04
yes in love don't think but it's00:51:07
what I say that00:51:10
you tell me forbidden no but if we tell you00:51:13
that simply we are in the process of educating00:51:15
people we have to say why we have to00:51:17
say it exactly we are going we are going we are going to00:51:19
make a show00:51:22
if you are really in love you you00:51:24
hear very well and then you will00:51:26
explain to the sea00:51:29
in love with his coach send him00:51:32
messages until and then after apologizing00:51:33
without being asked a question no00:51:35
it's of the same order it's a fantasy in00:51:37
in the end you just know that the00:51:40
person sees this is your role this is00:51:42
your social role you see this is the00:51:44
thing the guy who speaks well and so on00:51:45
but you don't know what it is on a00:51:48
daily basis d 'being with this person00:51:49
there is a lot you see an interface in00:51:50
fact they want to marry you yeah but00:51:53
well listen afterwards also it's part of the00:51:55
Game you have to leave people just a00:51:57
question because I find that we do00:51:59
n't have we didn't talk about it at all we are00:52:00
so much in the spontaneous the illusion00:52:02
of feelings in a few00:52:05
generations ago four five generations00:52:07
not even maybe three four five00:52:08
generations in certain civilizations00:52:09
always do that orange marriages00:52:11
where it is you and I we meet again at00:52:14
this time our parents chose us00:52:16
for each other there was00:52:17
no feeling and this marriage already00:52:20
they hold but especially after 4000:52:23
years when we ask them do00:52:24
you have feelings they are very00:52:26
in love very very in love there and for00:52:29
me it is a certain proof of the fact00:52:31
that this feeling that I00:52:34
put in you I put in you00:52:36
illusion00:52:42
you know what happens is that00:52:44
often we have too quickly we were too quick00:52:47
to draw on this way in which00:52:49
ancestral Africa of course consolidated00:52:52
the bonds of marriage but it solved00:52:54
a lot of problems first problem00:52:55
you know what it is the capacity00:52:57
of observation that our ancestors had00:52:59
to watch this saying when they analyze00:53:02
an analysis which was both00:53:04
vertical and horizontal when they00:53:06
in fact analyze a woman he could00:53:08
know if this woman had the00:53:10
skills after ancestral Africa00:53:13
is not a dimension or00:53:16
explanation and you see is very00:53:18
structured we will tell you why00:53:20
because it is linked to her infertility00:53:23
they had the ability to observe a00:53:25
woman through certain00:53:26
physical aspects to see that she00:53:28
will not be able to be fertile for example so00:53:29
when we banned it was not that we00:53:32
don't like this woman or that she00:53:33
's not good for you but we'll00:53:34
sum it up simply by saying that we,00:53:36
our family, don't marry women00:53:39
for example for a flat foot in a00:53:40
certain way or that in a certain00:53:42
way it works or that our hips are00:53:44
quite tight because by observation00:53:46
he saw that generally this00:53:48
morphology did not have a capacity00:53:51
for example of fertility that so when00:53:53
I analyze all these concepts and that00:53:54
end up finding you a woman00:53:56
generally it is a woman who will00:53:58
have values who will have a00:54:00
belief in the divine who will have a00:54:02
capacity in the education of children00:54:04
etc and therefore all the factors00:54:06
which mean that we must have values00:54:08
that found us in a marriage you00:54:10
life the only thing that is missing now00:54:12
is the feeling oh promiscuity there00:54:15
promiscuity the sacred love00:54:18
what did you say about forbidden loves00:54:23
in a minute I think that we must00:54:27
first situate the framework why do00:54:29
we see that it is prohibited if00:54:30
it is prohibited in relation to00:54:32
societal observation we do not care about00:54:34
others people think if it is00:54:35
prohibited in relation to the parents in the00:54:37
end who will give it is you who lives00:54:38
with the person you have chosen but00:54:40
when it starts to clash with your00:54:42
personal convictions then it becomes00:54:43
problematic but also as they will00:54:45
say if ever this love risks00:54:47
to disturb00:54:48
the established codes and that even00:54:52
bothers you there is a problem but if00:54:53
it upsets certain people and00:54:55
it does not bother you there is no00:54:56
problem we have necessarily at times had to00:54:58
jostle people often we have problems00:55:00
parents who are super protective or00:55:02
they don't want to see the child00:55:04
make the same mistakes as them so00:55:06
in the ambition to protect you are told00:55:08
no don't do this don't do that sick00:55:09
you are MOOC in the end it's the person00:55:11
that Your heart has chosen so they will00:55:13
want to prevent a moment from happening either00:55:15
it will destroy an exceptional love that00:55:18
could have existed or it will create two00:55:19
frustrated people who will go and live a00:55:23
good life until the end of time so what00:55:24
I I can tell people that as long as00:55:26
it does not offend morality to a00:55:28
certain level, I have learned to let00:55:30
people love each other as they feel,00:55:31
how they sincerely think, I00:55:33
say to myself, society is in in the process of evolving the00:55:36
heart has its reasons that even reason00:55:38
ignores let's let people love each other and let's00:55:41
not take our case to have00:55:43
something of a category validated00:55:46
before answering the question I want00:55:48
I would like to come back in fact to a00:55:50
also case love is forbidden00:55:55
therefore in relation to the fact that there are00:55:58
illnesses linked to the electrophores of00:56:01
people so sometimes we love each other we can00:56:03
love each other very strongly and then we00:56:05
realize that we are both carriers00:56:07
of this disease for example so00:56:09
in fact love should not be00:56:10
just the feeling we talked about00:56:12
earlier something spontaneous we00:56:13
are in it I think that we will have to00:56:15
say to ourselves that we are going to have children it00:56:17
could be that among our children00:56:18
knowledge and education love and all00:56:21
that we could transmit in00:56:22
fact a serious illness and which could00:56:24
even make us plunge and00:56:26
even make us lose everything we have00:56:28
built there are the same cases00:56:30
where people are separated, children who00:56:33
have died and all that afterward there are00:56:34
exceptional cases where they have children00:56:36
who are not at all sick so we00:56:38
really need to conclude that00:56:40
we should in fact assume what we00:56:42
fact it is not forbidden to marry00:56:44
such a person but you should know00:56:46
that what you are doing you00:56:47
will assume it until the end that00:56:50
for me the prohibition is the00:56:52
control often we make prohibitions00:56:54
as you with it is what you00:56:56
started with finally what you established already00:56:59
at the beginning the prohibition and it is the00:57:02
control and at one time or the other as00:57:03
you said love for its reasons that00:57:05
reason doesn't think it's you have to00:57:07
be you have to have you have to be you have to00:57:10
try to be at peace with yourself and00:57:13
make sure not if you don't if it does00:57:15
n't bother00:57:16
so much the better we has nothing to say but it's00:57:19
clear that you have to have respect for00:57:20
yourself you have to have respect for00:57:21
the people who are important around00:57:23
us it's very important for me00:57:26
love starts with the heart but it00:57:29
had to continue to exist through the head00:57:31
we must not lose these two notions00:57:33
because if love makes us lose our00:57:36
heads then the head will make us lose00:57:38
love that is really very important00:57:40
at a given moment that we understand that if00:57:42
yes we are in love affairs of a00:57:45
one shot king ok if we are in this00:57:47
perspective there is no problem but00:57:48
if we want to be in a love which is00:57:50
constructed we make a love which has00:57:52
destiny we want a love that will00:57:54
produce offspring, there are00:57:56
factors that can be taken into00:57:59
account because in the end we get married,00:58:01
that's true for us, but we also get married00:58:03
so that this marriage00:58:05
ultimately becomes something something that brings to00:58:08
others that matters a plus to the society00:58:10
in which we are so here is me it00:58:12
will be my my last word what to love with00:58:15
the heart yes but then continue00:58:17
to love with the head00:58:20
love00:58:23
how long00:58:27
can we have to talk about00:58:28
love00:58:30
I don't think there is00:58:33
enough time to talk about love00:58:35
because love lives in me in time what do00:58:39
we call unless what00:58:44
can we fight against the view of the00:58:47
society of parents without taking into00:58:50
account what others think about00:58:53
love can put us in this genre00:58:54
[Music]00:58:56
of SAS but how can we fight00:58:59
against the Mute00:59:00
the question remains asked see00:59:04
you next time show00:59:05
it was the men from here00:59:08
[Music]00:59:25
[Music]Description:
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