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Video tags
Subtitles
Russian
00:00:02
can make your thinking00:00:04
adequate, and this video will probably be00:00:06
suitable not only for those people who00:00:08
have some obvious psychological00:00:10
problems, but also for those people who00:00:12
just want to be successful, happy and the00:00:14
most adapted in life00:00:17
because this method that I00:00:19
will tell you today belongs to the00:00:21
direction of psychotherapy CBT00:00:24
cognitive behavioral psychotherapy00:00:26
its main goal and the main meaning of00:00:28
existence is precisely to lead people00:00:31
to such a state of mental health00:00:33
and what they then mean by this is00:00:35
exactly what a person throughout00:00:37
his life he can independently00:00:41
cope with absolutely all the00:00:42
problems that life throws at him00:00:45
without losing any kind of00:00:47
composure or moderate reasonable00:00:50
optimism, and so let’s see what00:00:55
this method is that I’m00:00:56
going to tell you about today, it’s called00:00:58
cognitive restructuring, that is, it00:01:00
allows you to completely produce rey00:01:04
inventory all your thinking in00:01:06
such a way that it becomes the00:01:09
most optimal and what00:01:12
is the most optimal thinking for us and00:01:14
this is precisely the kind of thinking that00:01:17
is the most rational00:01:20
adaptive functional and for this00:01:23
it must firstly be flexible and00:01:25
secondly it must be as good as possible00:01:27
reflect exactly objective reality and00:01:31
well, sir, they say that such00:01:36
psychological problems are when a00:01:38
person has some kind of pens, some kind of00:01:40
cockroaches, and this means that he00:01:43
has some distortions of perception00:01:45
surrounding00:01:46
what the world is, let's see what kind of00:01:48
character they can be these00:01:50
distortions, I’ll take a black felt-tip pen,00:01:56
look at our thinking and what is00:02:01
in thinking in general, let’s look at00:02:03
thinking, this is one of the spheres of the psyche, and what00:02:05
is the psyche, the psyche is a huge organ,00:02:10
this colossal machine that was created, or rather,00:02:13
it developed with us in the process of evolution,00:02:15
it seems I just got inflamed, yes no,00:02:18
I want to put it00:02:19
in short, you can imagine in this00:02:24
way the whole situation that is happening00:02:26
in the world, life is like the game batman and you are00:02:30
this very little man who00:02:32
must eat00:02:34
the dots, name all the ghosts, that is,00:02:38
we need our thinking so that00:02:40
we constantly scan the surrounding00:02:42
reality for objects what was00:02:44
happening and we noticed both the pros and00:02:47
cons, and we would go for the pros in order to00:02:49
realize ourselves in them, and we would00:02:52
avoid the cons so that we would not be eaten,00:02:54
the icicle would not fall on our head, we would not be00:02:57
robbed and in the end we would climb onto00:02:59
the top of the food chain of the pyramid and00:03:02
would become the most successful and best00:03:03
adapted to life, and00:03:05
look, it turns out that the most00:03:07
balanced, most alternative00:03:09
thinking is the kind that goes along00:03:12
the middle and when we notice both the pros and00:03:16
cons that life throws at us in00:03:19
order to be good at it00:03:21
navigate and maneuver in order to00:03:23
notice the plus and direct00:03:25
targeted efforts to achieve them00:03:27
and in order to00:03:29
bypass the minuses in the process, but we may have a00:03:33
bias towards positive thinking,00:03:36
as a rule, this happens in00:03:38
situations when people forbid themselves to00:03:40
experience all sorts of negative00:03:42
emotions prohibits feel00:03:45
guilty and forbid themselves to feel anger00:03:47
and they spend their lives in total00:03:49
denial in total denial of everything, don’t00:03:53
spoil it, as a rule, these are codependents, these are the wives of00:03:56
alcoholics, drug addicts who deny that00:03:59
their spouses have problems, these are the00:04:02
wives of schizophrenics who cannot00:04:04
recognize the elephant in the room and who00:04:07
forced to resort to distortions00:04:09
of reality, as a rule, this is always00:04:12
accompanied by psychosomatics, but there is also a00:04:16
bias towards negative thinking00:04:18
when you in a person’s thinking are00:04:20
systematically dominated by00:04:22
automatically negative thoughts and00:04:27
what does this lead to? This leads to the fact00:04:29
that a person spends his whole life00:04:32
as if in so cloudy, as if under a00:04:35
hood, not noticing anything good that00:04:38
is in his life, in his life it constantly00:04:40
rains and he never sees00:04:43
the sun and this leads to the fact that his00:04:46
life becomes gloomy and gray,00:04:49
unhappy, but with various psychological00:04:53
diseases it is the nature of these00:04:55
automatic negative thoughts can00:04:58
be very different, for example, with anxiety,00:05:01
a person notices00:05:03
precisely negative thoughts, it is fraught with00:05:06
all sorts of dangers, if something00:05:09
is sick, oh, it could be cancer, I left the00:05:11
apartment, or the whole apartment will burn down, I’m about to get a00:05:14
job, suddenly they00:05:16
fire me from there, suddenly we go bankrupt,00:05:18
suddenly an icicle falls on the wrong side goal, suddenly00:05:20
my wife died, in short, a dangerous00:05:23
situation, a person only notices when00:05:25
depressed, automatically negative thoughts of a00:05:28
different nature, where a person notices00:05:31
precisely the depressing, sadness-inducing00:05:36
troubles of life, the hardships of existence that00:05:39
constantly cause him to be smart,00:05:42
not an escort with low self-esteem, there are also00:05:46
a lot of automatic negative00:05:47
thoughts, but they are only all directed at00:05:50
themselves00:05:51
I am bad I am stupid I am stupid I am a freak with,00:05:56
say, some kind of personality disorder00:05:59
when they bring up one00:06:02
emotional negative scheme00:06:04
for example distrust all people want to00:06:07
harm me00:06:09
they cannot be trusted or the scheme is00:06:11
emotional rejection00:06:12
no they will not love me no they will want00:06:14
to satisfy my needs, I00:06:17
will end up left alone, a scheme of social isolation,00:06:19
I am doomed to be alone all my life,00:06:22
I am very far from other00:06:24
people, people don’t like each other, people00:06:26
don’t need each other, warmed up, come in handy, pour in00:06:29
earlier,00:06:30
this is a search for negative thoughts in all00:06:33
other people, we are not a search negative00:06:36
thoughts about, in short,00:06:37
beliefs, a large number of negative00:06:39
beliefs about other people, they’re all [ __ ], they’re00:06:44
all fools, [ __ ], [ __ ], Yamal is the00:06:48
only good one, let’s see where00:06:50
all these negative thoughts come from,00:06:52
why some person can00:06:54
have so many of them, and why some even have them00:06:57
have such a narrowly targeted00:07:00
specificity that they can be formed00:07:03
precisely into a special kind of clearly00:07:05
defined psychopathology; automatically00:07:09
negative thoughts are never taken00:07:11
just out of thin air; a person00:07:14
is not a fool and his negative thoughts are00:07:17
always formed on the basis of some kind of00:07:21
experience that actually happened to him; the00:07:24
psyche received in order00:07:27
to fit this into its structure and what kind of00:07:30
experience this is, as a rule, it is a00:07:32
traumatic experience, that is, in childhood with a00:07:35
person and it doesn’t matter, not necessarily in00:07:38
childhood, just during his00:07:39
past some situations happened to him,00:07:41
what is psychological00:07:43
trauma when they were too strong and too00:07:46
big for the psyche to00:07:47
pull them and it was simply suppressed under their00:07:50
load and these impressions00:07:54
that happened to a person were00:07:57
either very strong so that they could00:08:00
pass without a trace or they lasted for a very, very00:08:02
long time,00:08:04
that is these were early, strong and00:08:06
long-lasting00:08:07
impressions on the basis of which a00:08:10
person formed precisely00:08:12
stable, deeply rooted beliefs and00:08:16
the tragedy of these beliefs, our psyche is an00:08:19
adaptation system that we need00:08:22
so that we can00:08:23
adapt, but here it already interferes with00:08:25
adaptation because a00:08:27
cruel joke happened here with her she after these00:08:31
impressions were formed is that they00:08:33
turned out to be so strong she is already00:08:36
now this is the psyche she is, well, the psyche is00:08:39
like this she absorbs everything into herself that she00:08:41
sees if she absorbed for a long time every00:08:44
day the child was told from the age of three to four00:08:46
you are stupid we you you don’t love us, you don’t, we do00:08:50
n’t need you, we don’t want you, you’re not00:08:52
talented, thousands could or the girls00:08:55
said you’re ugly, and so on and so forth,00:08:56
or the child was instilled throughout his childhood, put00:08:59
on a hat, put on a scarf, you’ll get sick, you’ll catch00:09:02
a cold, you’ll die because your00:09:04
parents had, for example, a person is00:09:06
anxious, then in this case this entire00:09:09
psyche will consist of these00:09:11
negative beliefs, and the tragedy00:09:14
is that after they have00:09:16
already been formed, if this experience has already00:09:19
been obtained, then at some point if it has00:09:22
already accumulated large, then the psyche will00:09:24
is capable of constantly00:09:26
reproducing it, and thus these00:09:30
beliefs themselves will provoke00:09:32
and contribute to the fact that all the time00:09:34
throughout your future life you00:09:35
will only be able to00:09:37
reproduce this negative experience00:09:40
and this can be changed, but only00:09:44
if if you can identify your00:09:46
automatic and negative thoughts,00:09:49
understand their formula,00:09:51
after all, realize and you can check their00:09:55
adaptability, reliability,00:09:57
realism, this is how much they00:10:00
really reflect00:10:02
objectively existing reality, this is a00:10:04
very interesting research00:10:06
process, its root and essence is not00:10:09
that you just take your00:10:12
black ones the glasses you wear if00:10:15
you have a lot of automatic00:10:17
negative thoughts were simply replaced with00:10:19
rose-colored glasses00:10:21
no, the point is not that00:10:23
because, as I said, positive00:10:25
thinking also has a lot of pros and00:10:27
cons, but the main point is00:10:32
that you looked at the world without glasses at all,00:10:37
just with wide open honest00:10:40
eyes and so that you see everything00:10:43
that happens in your life exactly as it00:10:45
really is and00:10:47
only after your thinking00:10:49
becomes rational you can receive00:10:53
in your life and you can continue to00:10:55
receive your life is a new experience and this00:10:58
means that your psyche will continue00:11:00
to develop and not get stuck in your00:11:03
traumatic situation, now I00:11:06
explained to you the essence of this method, but now I00:11:10
am with him the technique of this method and now the00:11:12
answer just flew by00:11:15
and you will remove two points of my narrative,00:11:17
maybe that same attentive00:11:20
viewer when you looked without a whip since00:11:22
then and is even waiting in your video about00:11:26
being aware of your emotions, I talked00:11:29
about a sign that consists of a00:11:32
situation of emotions and the thought of behavior then00:11:35
told that this sign is very00:11:37
well suited for you could become00:11:38
aware of your typical most00:11:41
common exaggerated emotions,00:11:43
but this tablet actually has00:11:45
much more resources in it than00:11:47
just identifying00:11:48
emotions because it helps00:11:51
us take the most important very first00:11:53
step to change our thinking, which is to00:11:56
identify automatically and negative thoughts00:11:58
that visit you in certain00:12:00
situations and then I gave an example, well,00:12:03
let’s say the situation is a visitor at a00:12:04
party, you are offered to play the00:12:06
guitar,00:12:07
you think I can’t handle it, I won’t play well, I sing00:12:10
out of tune, I won’t00:12:12
succeed, the emotions that you experience are shame and00:12:15
for example, the result is you really00:12:17
you play poorly, or let’s say this00:12:19
situation, a neighbor asked for help with00:12:21
her affairs, you think I’m a bad,00:12:25
terrible person, I refuse help00:12:28
when you refuse, you00:12:30
feel guilty and, as a result, behave00:12:33
succumbing to feelings of guilt, you still00:12:35
go and help the neighbors, or your00:12:37
husband sits and plays phone number you are00:12:39
feeling angry and00:12:41
at the moment you are feeling angry you00:12:44
think my husband is an [ __ ] he is an [ __ ] he does00:12:46
n’t like me at all behavior you are approaching00:12:49
your husband’s aretino as a result of which00:12:51
your relationship with him is deteriorating or00:12:53
let’s say your child bit a piece of a00:12:56
flower and you immediately you think he will die, you00:12:59
have anxiety, your thought he will die and00:13:05
your action, you wash his mouth and00:13:08
call the doctor, although in fact it00:13:10
may not even be a poisonous flower, and00:13:13
look what first of all we00:13:15
must understand in order to make our00:13:17
thinking adequate first of all, we00:13:20
must understand that if you experience00:13:23
any negative emotions, especially if00:13:26
you experience them on a regular basis,00:13:28
that is, they are systematically00:13:30
exaggerated in their intensity,00:13:33
for example, you suffer from depression00:13:35
when your emotions are constantly dominated by00:13:39
sadness and melancholy and hopelessness00:13:42
or, on the contrary, you suffer from00:13:44
some form of anxiety00:13:46
disorder, for example, you have00:13:48
panic attacks, hypochondria, social00:13:52
phobia, agoraphobia, specific phobia, or00:13:57
generalized anxiety disorder,00:13:58
then this always means that behind this there are00:14:02
some negative thoughts that you are not00:14:05
aware of,00:14:06
well, let’s say an example if if you were00:14:09
offered to play the guitar and you would00:14:10
think so it’s cool I’m in the00:14:13
company of my friends they all love me no matter00:14:16
how I play they will absolutely love00:14:17
my song I get so much pleasure from it and the music is00:14:21
created to have00:14:22
fun no one cares about me will00:14:24
evaluate then you would experience a sweet,00:14:26
joyful anticipation of the game and in the end00:14:29
you would be satisfied with how you perform,00:14:31
even if you were fake and drank, you00:14:33
still wouldn’t pay any attention to it00:14:35
because the root is the root of00:14:37
most of the problems and symptoms that are00:14:40
maintained in us mental00:14:41
states, but it is connected precisely with the fact that00:14:44
we think, I00:14:46
have now laid out this tablet just like this in the form of a00:14:48
tablet, but in fact in CBT, you00:14:50
know, there is a diagram of such a vicious00:14:54
circle of different spheres of the psyche that00:14:56
mutually influence each other, thinking,00:15:00
emotions, physical reactions and behavior,00:15:05
each of the links in this chain is the00:15:07
main spheres of our psyche, they00:15:09
support each other both cognitively and00:15:12
here in the situation before which00:15:15
all this can cause us,00:15:17
and in cognitive00:15:20
psychotherapy there are methods that00:15:21
directly affect00:15:23
behavior, for example, if you have agoraphobia00:15:26
and you are afraid to go outside, you00:15:30
just need to take it and go outside and00:15:32
then this link00:15:33
will break, or for example, if you00:15:36
suffer from excess shame,00:15:37
then you start00:15:39
to shame yourself a little bit and your social phobia also00:15:42
disappears, but still the best00:15:44
target and . this is precisely the effect on00:15:47
thinking,00:15:48
if you change your thoughts,00:15:51
everything will disappear immediately, in general, the first step of00:15:54
cognitive restructuring00:15:56
is precisely to understand the relationship between your00:16:00
emotions and your thoughts, and for example,00:16:04
the very first step and the most important step for00:16:06
treating depression is to realize that it is00:16:10
permissible for a person to eat this video is00:16:11
not so simple, I’m filming it precisely as a00:16:13
primer for depression in order to00:16:17
understand cognitive restructuring in general,00:16:19
this is the main method of00:16:22
treating almost all mental00:16:25
illnesses and depression, panic attacks,00:16:27
generalized anxiety00:16:28
disorder, and so on and so forth, that00:16:30
is, this video is a huge00:16:32
preparation for the future is just like00:16:34
such a standard template, and so the00:16:37
most important discovery that00:16:39
depressed people make is that they00:16:41
understand that their depression, their emotions are00:16:45
connected precisely with their negative thoughts00:16:48
that they have, the second step of00:16:50
cognitive restructuring is to understand00:16:54
and formulate00:16:55
these thoughts because they are00:16:57
automatic and we often don’t00:17:00
realize them, it’s just that it00:17:02
flashed by, I didn’t see anything what it00:17:04
was, so if you have00:17:06
some kind of negative emotion, for example with00:17:08
depression, sadness, it’s your sacred duty and00:17:11
obligation to sit and understand that I00:17:14
just thought that I just thought and the00:17:17
result must be written down in00:17:20
this tablet, for example, life is meaningless and00:17:23
write it down00:17:27
is meaningless, or for example,00:17:31
nothing will work out for me, any thought can be00:17:37
formulated,00:17:39
it just requires special practice00:17:42
over a period of time, you00:17:44
listen to your thoughts and that’s it00:17:46
you managed to catch it like a fish,00:17:48
you identify it and write it down, then00:17:51
the most interesting part begins. The00:17:53
third step of cognitive restructuring00:17:57
is you take this recorded00:18:00
Michelle, write it out separately and after00:18:05
that you ask her a series of questions in00:18:07
total there are 12 questions to00:18:11
challenge negative thoughts what is our00:18:14
goal our goal check the validity00:18:16
and reliability of these thoughts and their00:18:18
correspondence to objective reality00:18:20
after you ask00:18:23
12 questions for each of these thoughts, you write down00:18:27
the answers under this thought and at the end you00:18:30
write down the conclusion that you00:18:32
got about depression I will have a00:18:35
separate video now I suggest taking00:18:37
not from some everyday sphere, let's let the00:18:40
muscles play the telephone, my husband is a goat, let's00:18:42
try to challenge this thought,00:18:45
my husband is a goat, now we will go00:18:50
straight through all the main 12 questions, so00:18:53
let's check the00:18:55
validity and reliability of00:18:57
the thought,00:18:58
my husband is a goat, your husband is sitting playing00:19:02
computer game and you think about him, he's an00:19:04
[ __ ],00:19:05
you feel angry at him, you00:19:07
move and yell at him, you're lazy,00:19:09
you don't love me,00:19:12
I spent the best years of my life on you,00:19:13
why aren't you developing, I'm the only one00:19:16
doing housework, you're doing nothing for00:19:18
days tyrant k and we have a list of00:19:22
questions, 12 of them, I will leave a list of these questions00:19:25
in the description under the video so00:19:27
that you can carry out00:19:31
cognitive restructuring yourself. I laugh00:19:33
because00:19:34
people liked the advice. How much00:19:37
money did you save by watching this00:19:38
video? Watching this video is00:19:42
priceless in the past what is this truly00:19:45
and so the first question is what are the first four00:19:48
questions the most important the first question00:19:50
what are the arguments for the fact that my00:19:53
husband is an [ __ ] and what are the arguments00:19:56
against so we take it straight and in fact we do this00:19:59
page but it’s better00:20:02
not to do it in writing of course It’s better to do it00:20:04
only in written form and it’s possible00:20:05
to do it, so again, buy00:20:07
a notebook in general, cognitive prize00:20:10
therapy is all that, so what00:20:12
are the arguments for the fact that my husband is an00:20:15
[ __ ], the00:20:16
first thing is he plays a computer game,00:20:20
what other reasons are there for00:20:23
him not to give flowers?00:20:29
in favor of my00:20:31
husband being an [ __ ], he doesn’t know how to do repairs, that00:20:37
is, specific facts, he hasn’t fixed the faucet00:20:42
for three months now, it’s00:20:44
leaking00:20:45
4 he’s lazy,00:20:48
yeah, that’s a danger,00:20:53
you can’t write like that in any case, it’s a very big00:20:55
mistake because the most The main rule00:20:57
for day-to-day restructuring is that00:21:00
in pillboxes, both pros and cons, should not be00:21:03
our opinion, not our assessments, not our00:21:06
judgments, not what we think, not what00:21:08
seemed to us, but only one thing,00:21:11
real existing concrete facts,00:21:15
so lazy is an assessment. it doesn’t00:21:18
fit00:21:19
the arguments for any more, we couldn’t strengthen00:21:22
our wife, well, what are the arguments00:21:24
against the arguments against the fact that my husband is00:21:28
koziol,00:21:29
but this is more interesting and the most00:21:32
important thing is probably the search for arguments against00:21:35
this is exactly the most basic sub-00:21:38
point of this cognitive restructuring00:21:40
why because this is how it happens with us00:21:42
when we have some kind of00:21:43
automatic automatic negative00:21:47
thought and we are used to thinking it, this00:21:50
is also accompanied by the fact that in00:21:52
our brain we have already formed a certain00:21:54
neural pathway that drives us from00:21:57
well, this is already this snowball in a circle in a00:22:00
circle in a circle in a circle and we are no longer00:22:02
noticing anything around her, and when you00:22:05
select arguments against, then you take off00:22:07
your blinders00:22:08
and you, as it were, begin to look no longer in this00:22:11
narrow corridor of yours, but rather00:22:14
you look closely at completely different00:22:16
other possibilities, you open your00:22:19
worldview you open your eyes,00:22:21
open your thinking, and thus00:22:24
you have the opportunity to form00:22:26
some new neural pathway or00:22:28
some other new neural pathway that00:22:31
will already drive00:22:33
completely different thoughts in your head, this will be a very,00:22:35
very interesting process because00:22:38
these facts exist00:22:39
but you are not used to looking for them then and00:22:42
just for fun we will find them you can00:22:44
earn a lot of money second we my00:22:47
husband00:22:51
took our children from kindergarten every day for three whole months00:22:53
my husband and I have00:22:56
wonderful sex my husband is a very00:23:01
smart person to me It’s interesting00:23:02
to talk to him, well, you can say that he’s a00:23:09
very smart person, this is an assessment, but00:23:11
it’s interesting to talk, this is a fact, that is, he’s00:23:13
really interesting to talk to.00:23:15
Fifth, when we go to the store, he00:23:18
carries heavy bags all the time, I feel like00:23:21
just queens, I need to00:23:23
work really hard in life and the last00:23:26
point, when I got sick, he was00:23:28
happy to go to the pharmacy, so it00:23:31
turns out that my husband is not such a00:23:33
goat, it turns out there are a huge00:23:35
number of arguments against the fact that he is a00:23:38
goat, well the first question is the most00:23:41
key, the most key, and it is very important00:23:45
that you train yourself to do just that. look for and00:23:47
find arguments against it will be very00:23:50
interesting, I assure you, everything should00:23:53
tell you a very important thought if, for example,00:23:56
you are a client who works with a00:23:58
psychotherapist or you are a psychotherapist,00:24:00
take note there00:24:01
is always a very big temptation, for00:24:03
example, you spend time with someone, for00:24:06
example, with your00:24:07
depression you are trying to convince him a00:24:09
very large salon is always starting to00:24:12
argue against this person00:24:15
instead of himself and this leads to the fact00:24:17
that he just starts arguing with you even more,00:24:19
for example, this girl,00:24:21
for example, if she were talking about my husband00:24:23
is an [ __ ] and I said no, he’s not a goat,00:24:25
he earns a lot of money, she would00:24:27
only say, but he doesn’t give me flowers at all,00:24:30
that is, people start00:24:32
arguing with these arguments against, so it’s00:24:34
very important that a person who00:24:36
has a negative point so that he finds them himself00:24:38
doesn’t have to look for him instead there is no need00:24:41
to do this juggling because its00:24:43
main point is for him to learn to00:24:46
look for alternative ways00:24:49
if they exist, well let’s move on to the00:24:52
second question the second question is00:24:54
whether other explanations are possible, that is,00:24:57
what other explanations could there be for the fact00:25:00
that my husband is sitting playing in the telephone00:25:03
besides the fact that my husband is an [ __ ], what00:25:07
other reasons could there be for the fact that he is00:25:08
playing in the telephone, oh my god, what a00:25:11
nightmare and I urgently need to find them,00:25:14
maybe he’s tired oh00:25:15
let’s write down tired as00:25:19
assumptions so so so so why else00:25:22
can a person play telephone00:25:24
let's look for the brain with work,00:25:28
maybe it's because I'm constantly00:25:30
criticizing him aru and he closed down and00:25:34
just because he's afraid of me, that is,00:25:37
maybe he plays telephone precisely because00:25:39
I'm yelling at him, this should00:25:43
also be written down closed well let's say00:25:47
maybe there are other00:25:50
explanations besides the fact that he's an [ __ ] the00:25:53
third question is what would someone else think in such a situation,00:25:59
well, it's good that Anka thought Anka00:26:03
if this if she was the wife of00:26:05
my courage thought Anka Anka you00:26:07
thought about and I there is a husband and Manka00:26:13
Manka so that Manka thought you thought00:26:15
I so my husband doesn’t beat me and he’s not an00:26:19
alcoholic God what happiness and Katka00:26:23
Katka would have thought what and Katka would have00:26:25
thought my husband is not cheating on me and00:26:29
besides he is not infertile we were able to00:26:32
parents of children here Christmas tree-sticks in general,00:26:36
the husband is no longer turning out to be a goat, well the00:26:38
next question 4 is also a very interesting00:26:41
question, what advantages and disadvantages00:26:44
does this way of thinking give me? We very00:26:48
rarely are generally critical of the00:26:50
very00:26:51
way of our thinking00:26:53
because when we believe our own if we are00:26:54
completely immersed in it we seem to be00:26:56
looking at the situation from the inside, and here it00:26:59
gives us the opportunity to00:27:01
look at ourselves from the outside, well, what are00:27:03
the shortcomings, what shortcomings does00:27:06
this thinking that my husband is an [ __ ] give me, well,00:27:09
naturally, it ruins our relationship,00:27:13
what other shortcomings are there, well, this doesn’t allow00:27:18
me to get that what I want in our00:27:20
relationship because it doesn’t allow me00:27:22
to ask him00:27:23
what I want it blocks me when I contact00:27:26
him00:27:27
and as a result of this I myself don’t get00:27:29
what I want oops and sometimes I myself don’t00:27:34
get it well these were the disadvantages and00:27:36
what are the advantages This way of thinking gives me00:27:39
a lot of interest. It would also be interesting00:27:41
to look at this question.00:27:44
Advantages: oh I know I look cooler00:27:49
compared to it00:27:50
because when I say that they would be00:27:51
stupid, they don’t develop, I myself think that I00:27:54
’m smart, cool, I’m confused, let’s00:27:55
write it down, and write it down00:27:59
allows me to rise above him, that is, he00:28:05
supports me with respect, this person00:28:09
at this moment when a person looks at00:28:11
now from the outside, he00:28:13
perfectly sees all the flaws and flaws in00:28:16
his thinking further 4 questions are the00:28:19
most basic, the first four questions, but00:28:22
there are also other very interesting questions00:28:24
due to the fact that they will see the00:28:25
universal ones, imagine all these 1200:28:28
questions, they cover all00:28:31
psychopathologies in the world and allow you to00:28:33
check any absolutely any00:28:36
negative thought for its reliability and00:28:38
compliance with reality, which is why00:28:41
cognitively sharply spins, this is the most00:28:43
important method of cognitive behavioral00:28:45
psychotherapy and this is the most universal00:28:47
method which is the main means of00:28:50
treating almost any disease00:28:53
along axis 1, well, well, the fifth question is based00:28:57
either on my well-being or00:29:00
on the facts that actually happened in this00:29:03
case, well, yes, of course,00:29:05
my thought is based on the00:29:06
facts that actually happened, but my00:29:09
emotion was in this case00:29:11
exaggerated in the first place that is, my anger00:29:14
was excessive and secondly, I didn’t00:29:16
value other facts because I00:29:19
only taught that one fact out of nine00:29:22
that was beneficial and interesting to me so00:29:24
that my anger had something to00:29:26
cling to. Further, the sixth question, what00:29:30
logical mistakes are I making?00:29:33
logical errors are made, of course, if00:29:36
you are not at all familiar with psychotherapy,00:29:38
for example, you don’t watch my channel,00:29:39
you don’t get information about this from00:29:41
any other sources, it may00:29:43
be difficult for you to independently support your00:29:48
own reasoning with some decent, weighty argumentation, but before that00:29:51
I have all the other video00:29:54
channels in which I give you a huge base of00:29:56
theoretical material according to00:29:59
which this question could be00:30:01
answered as follows, I make00:30:03
such a logical mistake that I think that00:30:05
if I subject my husband to00:30:07
violence, that is, shout at him,00:30:09
then this will give me the opportunity to get00:30:12
what I want, but in fact, as a result,00:30:14
this only leads to the fact that he00:30:15
closes himself off from me, our relationship deteriorates00:30:18
and in tone my needs remain00:30:20
unsatisfied, so if I want to00:30:23
get what I want from him, then in00:30:26
this case I must I will simply ask him about this,00:30:28
formulating my00:30:31
request in an accessible and understandable way for him00:30:33
instead of yelling at him00:30:35
and giving him negative assessments further00:30:38
7 am I forgetting some important00:30:41
facts and not overestimating or the significance of00:30:43
little things, exactly this situation happened00:30:46
without further thinking in extreme in00:30:49
all-or-nothing categories,00:30:51
of course I’m arguing, I think that my husband is00:30:54
either an [ __ ] or he should be an ideal,00:30:57
but any person is absolutely multi-faceted,00:30:59
I didn’t further consider questions00:31:03
that are impossible to answer,00:31:05
look further here from 9 in principle to 13 question00:31:09
they are no longer suitable for this situation and00:31:11
in this case, to solve this00:31:13
situation, in principle, it would be quite possible to use the00:31:15
first 4 questions, which are00:31:17
already enough to solve a very00:31:19
large number of situations from 9 to 13;00:31:23
this, in principle, is more suitable for00:31:25
low self-esteem and all kinds of00:31:27
anxiety states after you have00:31:29
driven away your a negative thought on all00:31:33
this issue remains for us the last00:31:36
final fourth step of00:31:38
cognitive restructuring below as a00:31:42
conclusion you00:31:44
summarize and below you write down the00:31:47
alternative thought that you00:31:49
got as a result it will be an00:31:53
alternative thought that more00:31:57
adequately reflects the00:31:58
site objectively existing reality00:32:00
and how If only our conclusion would sound here,00:32:04
the result and the result, my husband is not an [ __ ],00:32:07
of course I don’t like the fact that he plays00:32:09
computer games,00:32:10
but he could earn money, we have00:32:13
great sex,00:32:14
he’s a very smart, interesting person, in00:32:17
principle, I’m happy with both Anka and00:32:19
Manka no, it’s quite possible that00:32:21
he’s playing phone games not at all because00:32:23
he’s an [ __ ], but precisely because I’m00:32:26
subjecting him to psychological violence and00:32:28
this method of treating him00:32:31
is not the best, he’s preventing me from00:32:33
getting what I want, let me better00:32:36
go and formulate it now a00:32:38
clear, specific request to him and then our00:32:41
relationship with him will only improve and00:32:44
I will have no reason for irrational00:32:45
anger. Let’s see what mistakes00:32:48
people most often make when they00:32:51
try to carry out cognitive00:32:53
restructuring. First, it’s00:32:55
very difficult for them to identify their00:32:57
automatic and negative thoughts, they do00:33:00
n’t have them at all. understand and they say00:33:02
my head was empty00:33:04
I don’t think anything at that moment I just00:33:06
experienced a negative emotion but I didn’t00:33:08
think anything it’s not very difficult to identify your00:33:10
negative thought00:33:11
but that shouldn’t stop you be00:33:13
sure to continue to identify your00:33:16
negative thought until you you won’t00:33:18
be able to formulate it,00:33:19
believe me, behind every negative emotion00:33:22
there is a negative thought and try to formulate it in such a way00:33:26
that it is00:33:28
clear enough and concrete, that is,00:33:31
if it turns out to be something very complex00:33:33
ornate, like some cloud such and such00:33:35
reduces it to some00:33:38
simpler sentence to some one and00:33:40
the main thing is thoughts and ideas the00:33:47
second main mistake that people00:33:50
make when they carry out cognitive00:33:51
restructuring when they try to00:33:54
fill out the arguments for and against they00:33:57
include facts that do not really exist,00:34:01
their opinions, assessments or some00:34:06
assumptions, some of your own tastes, it’s easier00:34:08
to write there a feeling you can’t do this,00:34:11
you can write only facts and finally the00:34:14
third and most recent mistake is that00:34:17
when someone else starts00:34:21
filling out the arguments against for you, but it is very important00:34:24
that you yourself look for the arguments against00:34:27
because it is the process of searching for them00:34:29
is the process of bonding with your brains00:34:32
is the most important process that00:34:36
allows your habitual00:34:38
stereotypical thinking to go beyond its own00:34:41
limits, let it be better for you to find00:34:43
one argument against at least than for someone to00:34:47
find 10 for you next time you00:34:49
will find 2 next time you will find 3 and00:34:52
so gradually it is your thinking that00:34:54
will become more and more flexible,00:34:57
adaptive, rational, adequate and the00:35:00
most objectively reflecting the00:35:02
existing reality,00:35:04
damn, I don’t know, to be honest, it’s not00:35:06
a mistake at that moment, I just00:35:08
thought for some reason, I think I have a00:35:10
fairly large number of people watching00:35:12
precisely young and smart people00:35:14
at the same time, and among them there will certainly be00:35:18
some temptation to say something00:35:20
like objectively existing reality,00:35:24
we were aware of it, or maybe there is00:35:28
no objectively existing reality at all, well in this case00:35:30
we can say that our task is to00:35:32
most adequately perceive the visible00:35:36
part reality in all its pros and00:35:39
cons at the current moment in00:35:41
time, well, yes, this video is our base and00:35:47
I explained the whole principle and mechanism to you today, but00:35:50
we will still use this template and outline,00:35:52
but00:35:53
every time I shoot a00:35:55
video there about generalized anxiety00:35:57
disorder about panic attacks00:35:59
about depression we will do00:36:02
cognitive restructuring for each00:36:04
individual specific topic so don’t00:36:06
worry or worry if you00:36:08
think that you won’t be able to do it yourself,00:36:10
I will continue to help you but for now, just00:36:12
for fun, you can00:36:14
check it out for yourself your cognitive00:36:16
intellectual abilities,00:36:17
subscribe to my channel,00:36:19
like, leave comments and wait for00:36:21
my new videos, bye everyoneDescription:
Когнитивная реструктуризация - главный метод когнитивно-поведенческой психотерапии, который направлен на изменение мышления. На то, чтобы сделать мышление наиболее адаптивным, рациональным, функциональным, наиболее объективно отражающим реальность. Этот метод подходит для проверки обоснованности негативных мыслей при лечении всех психических заболеваний: депрессии, тревожных расстройств (агорафобии, социальной фобии, генерализованном тревожном расстройстве, ипохондрии, специфических фобиях), ОКР, расстройствах личности, заниженной самооценки. 11:05 Техника когнитивной реструктуризации 15:57 1 шаг: понять взаимосвязь между событием, эмоцией и мыслью. Понять, что эта мысль вызвана именно каким-то событием и является реакцией на него 16:50 2 шаг: сформулировать мысль 17:54 3 шаг: Проверка обоснованности и достоверности мысли на соответствие реальности (12 вопросов сократического диалога) ссылка на вопросы: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1bC9WuxI_rte3cFd_mmpeEiMnfBh8PK3z/view?usp=drive_open 31:38 4 шаг: создание итоговой альтернативной сбалансированной мысли 32:48 типичные ошибки при выполнении КР Вопросы для изучения обоснованности мыслей. 1. Что свидетельствует за? Что свидетельствует против? 2. Возможны ли другие объяснения? 3. Что в такой ситуации подумал бы кто-то другой? 4. Какие преимущества и недостатки дает мне такой способ мышления? 5. Основана ли моя мысль на моем самочувствии или на реально произошедших фактах? 6. Какие логические ошибки я допускаю? 7. Не забываю ли я о некоторых важных фактах и не переоцениваю ли значимость мелочей? 8. Не рассуждаю ли я в экстремальных категориях – всё или ничего? 9. Не рассматриваю ли я вопросы, на которые невозможно ответить? 10. Не предъявляю ли я к себе более строгие требования, чем к другим? 11. Не переоцениваю ли я вероятность угрозы определенного события? 12. Если случится то, чего я так боюсь, что в этом было бы ужасного? 13. Не принимаю ли я на себя ответственность за вещи, которые я не могу контролировать? Если кому-то очень понравился метод, и хочется про него еще послушать, то у меня есть еще вот такое старое видео про него с большим кол-вом примеров https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=md6ZBgjrT5s ____________________________________________ Приглашаю вас на мой второй канал на Vimeo: https://vimeo.com/strl Если мои видео были для вас полезны, и вы хотите отблагодарить меня, то можете внести пожертвование: 1. https://new.donatepay.ru/@streletskaya 2. На яндекс.кошелек 410014011220528 3. bitcoin:14WckknYyqmewLgyQ1Vnvt52arURkqryQ2 4. https://www.patreon.com/strelochka
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